Sanity is Overrated

The difference

2012-01-26T00:26:00.003-05:00

When I meet new people here they always ask me if Vancouver is very different than Montreal. Aside from the very obvious differences, the language, the ocean, the mountains etc I am not sure I have really noticed too many differences. Although, having driven coast to coast a few times I can tell you every province is unique and wonderful in its own way. So maybe there are a few things that make this place special.

It could be where we are currently living, but there are A LOT of outdoor technical shops. Walking down West Broadway I passed 8 in 3 blocks. However, everyone seems to be wearing some variation of lycra/fleece/organic cotton blends, so I guess they need to buy it somewhere. If you need to find some high tech outdoor gear this is your city. There is one thing I am confused about, running lessons. I passed one particular shop advertizing running clinics for $160. Really, you need to pay someone $160 to tell you how to run. As far as I know it goes right foot, left foot, repeat, or if you are inclined left foot, right foot, repeat. Continue to breath (or you will die, and as it turns out this is autonomic so your fine), fling arms in any way which makes this horrible exercise feel tolerable and proceed forward until you feel like you want to quit, then continue for a while longer until you have dissuaded all your guilt about eating that white bread for breakfast. $160 please. There may be more to it but watching my 2.5 year old run around I can tell you it is pretty easy and natural so paying someone a stupid amount of money to "help you" run seems like a big waste to me.

Along those same lines, I hate Lulu lemon everything and it is pretty much the standard uniform around this city. In principle I don't mind wearing similar items for working out (really working out, not just walking to Starbucks), sleeping or cleaning my house but that is it. Yes those magic pants make you butt look super duper great, but it is hard to take someone seriously when they are wearing spandex. If you ever see me out in public wearing Lulu lemon you know that I have lost my mind, gone totally crazy and should immediately be locked up because I have become a danger to myself and others.

I have also been meeting a lot of green, granola, grain fed organic poultry kind of people. I smile and nod while they describe in detail the many many organic shops they frequent and where they buy their farm fresh everything and recycle everything from their hair clothes to their dishes. I try to be polite but I am not a very "green" person, I think I am more of a yellow, oatmeal, grain fed beef kind of girl. Back when I lived in Alberta I was more of an orangish, plain toast, and grain alcohol kind of girl but I am trying. I have always recycled but now that I have physically produced 2 more future consumers I feel I need to try a little more. Maybe living here is making me green by osmosis. I have switched the little man over to cloth hybrid diapers (G diapers are fabulous in case you are curious), I am buying and using only glass containers and buying some great local wild fish, but you can't ask me to give up my beef, sorry.

Speaking of food, there is a discernible lack of duck fat in this city. I have tried a few times to find a tub of duck fat and it seems that is not a standard ingredient around here, go figure. I have also noted an absence of fois gras, blood pudding, pate, non-pasteurized cheeses and a descent selection of cream. What is half & half light, isn't that milk? Seriously,35% cooking cream is not a crazy ingredient,but definitely lacking in the average grocery store around here. We can get good crab here, but I actually miss he lobster and the general commitment to food. Most people I have met are more interested in talking about what they don't eat (and the list is long) rather than the food they enjoy. Sort of backwards if you ask me. Food is amazing, it should be enjoyed and savored and shared with friends and loved ones.

Snow, that is something different here. I was under the impression that there was to be no snow. That is what we were paying the premium for. I feel like I deserve at least 10% rebate on our house for the snow I had to deal with last week. Never mind it was only a few cm's, I am now a Vancouverite and I don't do snow.

This is my new home and it is pretty good so far. I have actually met a lot of great people (not too green and crunchy) and we are setting in. I have lived in 4 provinces now and each time I had to start over and build my life again. This time it seems easier, I guess that is the beauty of family.

The whole adult thing

2012-01-24T23:52:00.010-05:00

Moving blows! Just in case you don't already know that, let me state it once again, moving blows. Well maybe moving across town to a shiny new house is pretty exciting, but moving in general sucks in all kinds of ways. We did make it to our new city, and I will admit Vancouver is beautiful! Very very beautiful. On the rare nice days I have been exploring the city with my two mini sidekicks snapping photos like crazy. The mountains, the ocean its all pretty spectacular. So that does not suck. However, having no friends, not knowing where anything is, and having to sort out all kinds of grown up stuff is the not so much fun part. Maybe its the being an adult thing I am not adjusting to very well. For 14 years I lived in the shelters of academia where I more or less got to put off being an adult for as long as humanly possible. But now, with a whopping mortgage, hubby having a real grown up job, 2 kids and my new wifey duties I can't hide from the reality, I am a grown up. Maybe not the best grown up out there, but I am learning/coping.

So far I have manged to change my name (finally, after almost 4 years of marriage), get all new ID, change all our bank accounts, schedule the hook up the phone, cable and electricity, find a new family doctor, and coordinate the sale of our old house, shower, locate and explore all the Costcos in the city, attend all sorts of mommy and me fun times, and get dinner on the table every night. Yup I am super woman.

The real work will begin next week when we get possession of our new house. I finally saw the outside, but still have not seen the inside. It will be a fun surprise, I hope. I am looking forward to seeing our stuff again, and not to be running up and down stairs all day. The place we are renting is 3 floors and there are exactly 32 stairs from our room to the kitchen. Who needs to go the gym. Missy's room is on the 2nd floor so I also get to do some stair exercises at night. Mostly I am looking forward to the young prince having his own room. Right now he sleeps in our walk in closet and lets just say he is not the best roommate ever. But we are in a great neighborhood and it is like a mini vacation while I size up our new city.

99.9% of the time things are pretty great. Mainly because we are together and it is making Missy so much happier/easier/content. We spend our mornings exploring the science center, aquarium, city, parks and playing at different drop ins. Then in the afternoon I haul 2 sleeping kids around while I do the adult stuff. Luckily they are both happy to sleep in the stroller and as long as I keep moving they keep sleeping. It was pretty weird when I went into the bank to update all our accounts and investments and they changed my status to homemaker. Not that I feel that it is not a worthy job, trust me it is a very worthy job, a hard job and a thankless job. But it is has never been my job, nor a job I really thought I would want. But we agreed right now that I need to be home with the kids to get them settled, to get the house and our life organized and to do all the other stuff so Dylan could focus on his new job. We agreed that it is the best thing for our family but it did not stop me from going into a total panic and spend the night combing the web for jobs. Of course I did not find any perfect jobs and then I went into a panic about never finding another job and not getting to use my degree again and basically mentally spinning out of control. This was aided by many nights of little sleep, a few too many cups of coffee and my general anxiety and craziness. Around 3 am I talked myself down off the ledge and realized that I don't need 10 perfect jobs, I just need one. And until the summer/fall my job is mom. Okay, breath again, but still panic sometimes because that is what I do. Anyways, that is an ongoing battle.

I do have to say that I am really enjoying my mommy time. Missy is a little person now, a funny, very crazy and creative little person. I love that I get to know her and spend time with her. I do how ever really have to watch what I say. She has a real knack for repeating the wrong thing at the wrong time. The little man is also pretty fun, he is the happiest more relaxed baby ever. He loves to watch his sister and he loves the volunteer ladies at drop in.

Anyways, I know this whole post lacks the fun factor, sorry. Next time I will be funny, but today it is raining and gloomy and I am not my sparkly self. But we are doing good. Until then here are just a few photos I love of our new surroundings.

Light at the end of tunnel....and it is not a train!

2011-12-27T13:34:00.001-05:00

Wow, Christmas is already gone, that was fast! Although we have been in Christmas mode for over a month, so in some ways it feels like it has been going on forever. Missy is old enough now to sort of understand Christmas so we decided to make that the focus to distract from some of the other fun issues like temper tantrums, daddy working in another province and the stress of not having a place to live. Well I have to say I have been loving all the Christmas spirit, the activities, the crafts, the stories, the movies and joy that it brings to my little ones face. Sort of sad it is over. Even the little man loved to sit under the tree and try and eat his presents. I think despite the craziness of the last 6 months, this was be the best Christmas yet. There is actually a lot of positive things that have been happening and I figured it was about time to focus on those.

Missy is finally learning to handle her emotions a little better, and mommy is learning to handle the whole thing better too. I have always sort of mocked parenting books, figured I was not the kind of parent who would get caught up in theories and dogma. However, I have to admit I was stumped and I actually read a parenting book, and even bigger shocker it actually worked. I won't say I liked everything about the book, but at least it had some good insight, some good suggestions and after putting it into practice we have now had 4 wonderful days. I am not in the habit of going around handing out unsolicited advice, but if you find yourself in a similar situation I would recommend the book 1,2,3 magic. Now I am just wondering if I can use the same tactics on my husband.....

We have a house. That is right, we actually bought a house and we will have somewhere to live in the not so far off future. Within 6 weeks we should be endlessly in debt, but in our own home with our own stuff. It may be small, we may have the same old crap to fill it, but at least it is our crap and our little home! It is nice to do something with my spare time besides pouring over mls listigs while crying inside. I have not seen this house yet mind you. That's right I trust my husband that much. Most people I talk to say I am crazy, but the reality is, right now I don't care about the details I just want a place for us to live, a place for my kids to call theirs and to feel like a family again. If you know me, you know that I am a super duper type A control freak so this is not like me at allhttp://www.blogger.com/img/blank.gif. I guess this is what sleep deprivation, and children have done to me.....that and stretch marks

Sibling rivalry. Yes there is a positive side to it. When Missy doesn't want to eat her food, I just plop the little guy in her seat and she comes running over ready to go. I am sure this will come back to bite me in the ass big time, but for now I am a bad parent using it to my advantage when I can.

Immunity, I am positive that by now we must be immune to everything under the sun. We have had 5 colds and 2 rounds of gastro in this house and thanks to the RotaTeq vaccine little man has managed to avoid both rounds of gastro. I can handle colds, snotty noses and ear aches but babies with gastro is another story. So I am grateful for the miracle of vaccinations....and washing machines. You don't really know how great they are until you are without one. Christmas eve after Missy puked on the coach and little man pooped all over his chair we found out that my parents washing machine died a tragic and untimely death....it made for a memorable night before Christmas that is for sure.

I am also positive that the next few months will be a big adventure. New places, new people, new home and new life. After 14 years of University living, I am finally saying goodbye to my school years and hello to my new big girl life. On Jan 1 we move as a family to our new life ...wish us luck.

Dear...

2011-12-11T00:30:00.003-05:00

Dear Friends:

Thank you so much for the amazing support! The phone calls, the emails, the comments and the pep talks over coffee. Thank you! These days I feel like a single parent, and I know I have said this before, but single parents deserve medals. We have made a huge amount of progress and no longer seem to have tantrums in public, they are typically reserved for me and only me. I know now that Miss A is very sensitive and over-punishing was making things worse. And mostly I try to remind myself she is only 2, and this is what 2 year old children do. And while I may not always like it, she is also entitled to her own option (I just figured I had at least 10 more years before that became a serious issue). 90% of the time she is amazingly funny, sweet, kind, caring and gentle so it really could be much worse.

Just the same, thank you again for giving me ideas/suggestions/love when I needed it.

But I would like to post a special message to the very snarky, middle aged, hippster bag who decided to roll her eyes and say loudly "this is why I do not believe in breeding" while I was attempting to deal with one of our last public meltdowns.

Dear Lady:

I am sure my daughters meltdown was a real inconvenience for you, I know that those 4 - 5 minutes of your life where you had to listen to her crying was probably the worst part of your month. I am sure that it put a damper on your extra hot soy double pump no sugar, $8 coffee which you actually got to finish while it was hot. But rest assured it was no picnic for me either. While you may not understand this, the whole discipline part of parenting is pretty much horrible for me too. I hate having to fight with my child, I hate having to listen to her cry and scream. But most of all I hate that look that you gave me, the look which says "if you have kids you should never leave the house".

I am a firm believer that children need to be taught how to behave in public. They need to learn to eat in restaurants, they need to learn how to conduct themselves in different environments and they can't learn that if we lock them in the basement and never let them out. Yes, you may need to put up with the occasional outburst,but as a race we would not be very successful if we all decided having kids was too inconvenient. So while I am at home eating dinner with one hand, peeing with the door open, and scrubbing carrot puree of the ceiling, you can sit back and enjoy that $40 bottle of Merlot and talk about the horrible lady and her brat who wrecked your day. But please remember one thing, all those horrible parents who choose to "breed" are raising the future members of society that you like to mock. And rest assured that one day those "brats" you hated will be your doctor/nurse/EMT, they will fix your car, fix your meals and fix the broken pipes in your house. Those brats will run the government and make decisions about your future. And since you are against "breeding" they will have to wash your wrinkled body and change your diaper too. Maybe instead of the dirty looks, you could show a modicum of gratitude for the fact that even if you don't believe in "breeding", other people do.

Those who live in glass houses....

2011-12-01T11:52:00.003-05:00

....hopefully don't have toddlers who throw temper tantrums!

Alright, I need some help, serious and desperate help before I loose what precious little is left of my sanity.

Before I was a parent (which is actually when I knew everything don't you know), I used to look at kids throwing fits in public and think, my god can't you control that kid. I would think that they were not punishing then enough, or maybe not at all. See I grew up in a fairly strict household. I was spanked, and I was given punishments and according to my parents I was a very very good child (but I already knew I was perfect, insert eye roll here). Anyways, I always assumed that those poor parents who's kids were going ballistic in the grocery store had somehow brought it on themselves. So I guess this is Karma's way of coming back to bite me in the ass big time.

Before we moved A had one tantrum. I did exactly what you are supposed to do, I removed her from the situation, I calmly said when you calm down we can discuss what you want and I did not give in. I figured we had the tantrum thing nipped in the bud. Wrong. As you read in my previous post we are in transition. Life is chaos, and I am doing my best to keep things sane and happy. My parents are wonderful with the kids, they help out all the time and they get to do a lot of activities with them. However, daddy is not here. We see him when we can but it is expensive to fly back and forth and doing it more than 2x a month is not possible. Yes I am under a mountain of stress, but I am trying my best not to let it show.

Now miss A is a very sensitive kid, not like me at all. She is upset easily when her routine is disrupted, she internalizes other peoples feelings and responds very negatively to other people's anger and stress. She is also very OCD, very very OCD. She has always been this way and I think this is just her nature. As a child she had many markers for autism but because she learned to speak so clearly, became more social and developed "normally" the doctors did not worry any more. However, lately I am wondering if her OCD is something I have to address in a specific way.

Lately she has been having epic, epic meltdowns. I know she is 2 and that is what 2 year olds do but this is different. If you touch her during a melt down she actually goes Chernobyl. If I try and remove her from a situation she starts to smash her head or kick and punch things. When she was a baby she would not let you touch her hands, she did not like to be touched when she ate and she was very selective about who could touch her. Once after hitting me many many times, I told her if she hit me again I would smack her hand so she knew how it felt. I did it and it enraged her, since then, every time she is mad she tells me she is going to smack me and then hits me. So a smack on the hand does not work. I have tried sending her to her room until she calms down but now when do something she does not like she tells us to go to our room and then freaks out when we don't do it. She actually says "I told you to go to your room and you are not listening to me, so I won't talk to you anymore". I have tried ignoring her behavior and then she gets insanely angry continues hitting and screaming until I am forced to put her in her room to calm down (it can last 30 minutes). She is smart, she understands everything and communicates quite well so I am sure it is not a lack of communication. Each time she has a meltdown she cries for daddy and it breaks my heart. I know she misses him but I can't let her act like a monster because I feel bad for her. I just don't know how to deal with her tantrums and her behavior. Please tell me what you did with your kids, tell me how you handle this phase.

So now I am in my glass house with an angry toddler and I am desperate to figure this out before the walls all come crashing down around us. Now I know, those parents did not want their kids to throw temper tantrums, they did not enjoy whining, crying and yelling any more than I do. So if you don't have kids, if you do and you forgot what it was like, please don't judge us when we are in public. Instead of giving us the stink eye, smile reassuringly because trust me that mom needs some reassurance.

Reading between the lines

2011-11-24T21:59:00.004-05:00

So it has been a while. Life is busy and I have not been in a good mood lately. The move went as smooth as it could have. We left Montreal in a huge rush. I feel like I did not really get to say good-bye the way I wanted, and there were a lot of people I did not get to say good-bye to. We landed in Calgary and settled in. Had a few days of family fun and then Dylan had to fly off to Vancouver to start his job and find us a house. The plan was for us to join him in November. Well after almost 8 weeks of searching we are still essentially homeless and it looks like we will be camping at my parents for a few more weeks. Don't get me wrong, I am grateful that the kids and I are able to stay here, my parents are wonderfully helpful, but it is not our family and it is not our normal routine. We miss having daddy around and this is not what I signed up for.

I am trying very very hard to be patient, to have faith that something will happen and we will have a place to live, but right now I am just plain old frustrated. Anyone who has tried to buy real-estate in Vancouver would understand, it is just plain crazy. We are looking at spending more money than I could ever have imagined and we can't even afford to buy a descent place. Most "houses" in our price range are being sold for land value only, meaning you pay a stupid stupid amount of money for a lot with a crap shack on it that is basically uninhabitable. And even these rat traps are going to bid, so the crazy high asking price for the ultra small pieces of pure crap are not even close to what they actually sell for. Monkey crap, hippo crap, dog crap, moose crap, all different variations of crap. It is very very depressing. The agent we were previously working with just kept insisting we find more money, like I had a spare $200,000 I just forgot to mention. Oh wait let me check my ass, nope none there either. Not only are the prices high, but the agents and sellers are delusional. Luckily I have gotten good at reading between the lines.

For your information, when you are buying a house under 800,000 in Vancouver you need to understand the following code:

Charming - really means this house contains some of the original (and very ugly) carpet, wallpaper, linoleum, and/or appliances (which may or may not work).

Cozy - really means this house is about the size of a garden shed, good luck turning around in the bathroom.

Potential - really means hopefully you have another $150,000 to spend fixing up this mess, even then you would be better to burn it down and start over.

Gardeners dream - this means the property is basically overgrown with weeds (or "wildflowers") and you may need a machete to get to the front door.

Beautifully maintained - this means that there are not holes in the walls, no boards over the windows, there may be mold, half of the cupboards may be missing, people could be using the fireplace as an oven, they may have stapled extension cords to the walls to run lights from room to room, and half of the fixtures may be missing, but it is not boarded up (I wish I was making this up believe me)

Recently renovated - this can really mean anything from they actually renovated the property to we painted a wall and change the toilet paper roll. Mostly it means they are asking about $150,000 more than it is worth.

Starter - this means it is a real huge piece of crap and only those blinded by new love could possibly see the "beauty" in place and be willing to fork over that kind of money to live here.

Centrally located - this means you will pay an extra $100,000 - 200,000 for the privilege of living within 1 hour commute of your work.

Sadly, my standards are so low right now I am dreaming of a beautifully maintained and recently renovated, centrally located, cozy starter with lots of charm and potential. For now you can address all my mail to tent # 6, Stanley park.

Its been than kind of 2 months

2011-09-21T21:00:00.006-04:00

So obviously I have been a little busy these days. Somehow 2 months have gone by already. Our little man is 2 months old. Generally he is a good little guy, he is a champion sleeper but like his sister will only tolerate his mother. If I leave the room he cries, if daddy holds him he cries, hopefully this phase goes quickly.

What else has been going on in our life?

We finally finished the kitchen renovation. 4 years after we started we finally got the backsplash tiled, the new granite installed and new cabinet doors. Just in time for someone else to enjoy it.

Put the house on the market...still no bites, but hopefully soon. Keeping the house spotlessly clean with a 2 year old and a newborn is not a trivial task.

Packing, sorting and cleaning. That is what I do. Wash, rinse and repeat.

Reading Curious George, its Missy's favorite book so we read it over and over and over again.

Missy turned 2! My girl is 2. She is talking up a storm, and exploring the limits of my sanity with her new found attitude.

Visiting our friends and family. We are trying to cram in lots of visits in a short time. We even stuffed both kiddos in the car and drove 600 km to Dylan's uncle's farm so Grandma could meet her new great grandson. Both kids did remarkably well considering a drive that used to take us 6 hours took us over 9.5 each way. There were some tears, some bribery and a lot of cookies, but we made it.

So that is our life. In 8 days we will be on a plane and Montreal will no longer be our home. It is surreal, since nothing is finished, nothing is taken care of, and only about 1/4 of our stuff is packed. Yah, the crazy control freak in me is having panic attack, luckily she is being over taken by the mom in me who is just trying to get through each day. I sort of feel like I may need a miracle to get through this next 8 days. Then we will be on a plane to Calgary to stay with my parents, oh yah did I mention we have no place to live in Vancouver yet.....I think I hear the wine calling my name.

The difference?

2011-08-07T06:20:00.000-04:00

A lot of people have been asking me if I noticed a big difference between the c-section and the "normal delivery". First of all, I would not consider Missy's birth a "normal delivery". In fact considering this one was essentially the same, I know now she was not meant to exit in that manner. I know now that I have a very small pelvis and my babies are just too big by comparison. Thankfully we live in an age of modern medicine or I would be a statistic.

In any case there were some differences between my last delivery and this one.

1. With a c-section I dread getting out of bed, with my last delivery I dreaded going to the bathroom.

2. With the c-section I got better pain drugs.

That is about it. This time around I actually feel like I recovered faster. Probably because I was not worried about my baby and sleeping in a chair in the children's hospital. Yes I have a scar but I don't really care that much, since I have already decided my career as an exotic dancer or adult film star is not going to happen, it is pretty much a non issue. Technically I am not supposed to lift heavy objects (anything over 10lbs), which includes my own daughter, but that is what daddy is for these days. Oh, and this time my mom was here to help out. As I have learned moms will pretty much do anything for their kids, yah for moms!

I have also been asked if there is a difference between a baby girl and the baby boy. Well aside from the obvious, so far nothing. Mr does like to sleep more than Missy did, and he is less fussy but I am pretty sure that is his personality and not related to his gender. Although I have been peed on more with this little guy than I ever was with Missy, so I guess that counts as a difference.

What I do find different is how I feel about being a mother the second time around. Since we are certain this is the last time we are doing this I am determined to enjoy every moment, even those fun 3 am moments. I think I am calmer and more collected this time around, crying does not bother me as much. I react differently to each situation because I know that these phases don't last long. I don't wake my baby up every 3 hours to feed them like I did when I was a paranoid first time parent. I don't panic over every rash, noise or poop. If only I could have had the second one first life would have been so easy.

Welcom to our family little man

2011-07-21T13:51:00.004-04:00

Well I feel a whole lot better today than I did one week ago. For those of you who have not heard our little man finally decided he wanted to come and join our family. Baby I was born last Thursday at 4:59 pm, weighing a whopping 8lbs, 12oz and measuring 21 inches long. Yes I have big kiddos.

For those who wanted the details here you go, for the rest skip to the next paragraph. I actually went into labor on Wednesday night. Around 9 pm I realized I was having regular contractions. Sorry Dylan I guess your son did not listen to your request for a daytime exit. We headed to the hospital around 3:30 am when the contractions were 4 minutes apart and building. They admitted me right away and then the fun began. After admission my labor started to stall so they broke my water and I walked and walked until the contractions built up again. For those people who say back labor is a myth I say, ha ha. Like with baby A my back was in agony the whole time. It never eased up between contractions and some of my contractions were lasting 2 - 3 minutes each. By 9am I could not take it any more and I begged for the anesthesiologist. I had planned on going au natural this time but with no sleep, constant pain and no immediate end in sight I figured I was not going to be a hero. The epidural only partially worked. It did dull the pain but I could still feel every contraction and within about 30 minutes I wanted to push. They checked me and sure enough we were ready to go. Everyone figured this thing would be wrapped up before 11 am. So I pushed and pushed, with no results. Then my labor stopped again. So they told me to take a nap while they loaded me with pitocin. I rested a little but as soon as they started the pitocin I could feel the contractions again, this time much more strongly. After a few hours of agony they told me to try and push again. We tried for 2 more hours. At that point I broke down and told them to turn off the pitocin, up the epidural and get me a surgeon. After what happened with Missy I was not going to risk that again and obviously my body does not understand how to expel children on its own. I am fertile, I can carry these giant babies but what to do after that is apparently a mystery. So by 4pm they were prepping me for surgery, loaded me with enough drugs to finally kill the pain in my back and wheeled me off to the OR. By 5 pm I was looking into my baby's eyes. This time I was the one in pain, the one who had to stay in the hospital, but my baby was safe, sound and healthy so I did not care. Maybe that was the morphine talking.....

So we had stay in the hospital for 4 days. We had asked and paid for a semi private room but instead ended up in the ward room with 4 other people and defective AC. Curtains offer very little in the way of privacy and nothing makes you miss home more like camping with 4 other families you have never met. I did enjoy the smells of Jamaican BBQ which was going on in one corner of the room, but it did not mix well with the Mexican fiesta in the other side of the room, so basically we had a very hot, very smelly, very loud prison. I was pretty gratful when they let me out of bed to walk around and get some "fresh air", but completely underestimated how weak I would be. Just getting to the bathroom was a 30 minute adventure. However, the body is an amazing thing and now one week later I am feel great, with the exception of not really being able to get out of bed on my own. It helps that my mom is here to take care of Missy.

There are a lot of things that are different this time around. First I have more confidence so I did not let the nurses bully me around. Which is key if you are going to survive 4 long days in the hospital. It is amazing to me how they think they can guilt breastmilk out of your body. "Oh your milk has not come in and your baby won't latch, well you just have to try harder because if you give the baby formula it will die". As with little Missy, #2 did not want to breast feed. So while I pumped and pumped I still needed something to feed the little guy. I dreaded having to call and ask them for the formula because each time I got the look and the lecture, and each shift change meant a new fight for me to explain myself. "Yes I plan on feeding the baby expressed breast milk, but until I have milk he needs to eat something." One nurse actually refused to give me the formula and said "I have already signed out my quota of formula for the day." I burst out laughing, what is it a narcotic? I had an easier time getting extra pain killers than formula. Luckily, I only had to do it for 2 days, by day 3 I had more than enough milk for little man but I was not allowed to feed him a bottle, I had to use a cup. Have you ever cup fed an newborn, its a whole fun experience let me tell you. Anyways, we played along and eventually just told them what they wanted to hear so they would let us go home and leave us alone. I am thinking of writing a guide on how to covertly feed your child in the hospital if breast feeding isn't your first and primary love in life.

Little Missy is adapting well, she loves her brother and likes to give him lots of kisses and hugs. Another fun activity is explaining what a breast pump is to a toddler.

So life around here is pretty good, baby I is calm and relaxed most of the time and I hope that I can sleep on my side before the end of the weekend.

Dear Body

2011-07-11T16:01:00.005-04:00

Dear Body,

While I am very grateful for your fertility and that you have fully embraced your roll as incubator and keeper of my children, I am sure that you do not realize that your job is yet to be completed. It seems that there is some confusion as to how long you must feed and protect these babies and I just wanted to let you know that you could release your latest occupant any day now. Perhaps you have forgotten how nice it was to be able to sleep comfortably, move freely and enjoy the occasional glass of wine. Perhaps you are simply afraid of pain, so let me reassure you that they do have drugs at the hospital if you want them. They also have air conditioning which would be nice since it feels like 39 degrees with humidity today. In short, please get on with your job so we can return to normal.

Sincerely,

The main occupant of the body

Still waiting

2011-07-05T12:44:00.008-04:00

Yup still waiting and still pregnant. Very very pregnant. Did I mention it is very very hot in Montreal right now. With humidity it is something like 35 degrees which makes for a grumpy mamma bear. If it were not for ice cold baths and popsicles I would have lost my mind already. My kids appear to have inherited their punctuality from their father, if this baby were mine he would have had the good sense to arrive early. I am excited to have this baby, excited to wear normal clothes again, and excited to not have to discuss my pregnancy with random strangers. I know they are being polite and nice and curious but I am tired of saying things like, "yes I am sure there is only one in there", "yes it is a boy", "yes the heat makes it harder", and "yes I know I am pregnant". My personal favorite was today at the store when I was buying a popsicle a drunken jackass who decided to mock me, and then proceeded to tell me that his wife was pregnant last summer and he could not wait for her to have the baby because all she did was complain about being pregnant in the summer. "Oh poor you, it must have been so hard for you with your wife being hot and swollen and then having to actually deliver the baby. You really must have had it rough." Seriously, any man who is dumb enough to say something like that to a pregnant lady needs to step away from all sharp objects.

Anyways, enough about the complaining. While waiting for this little monkey to arrive we have been busy. Thanks to Grandma (Gaga) we are able to get out and do lots of fun activities. Missy has enjoyed her summer so far and I am grateful for the extra hands, and legs to chase little Missy.

Train ride around the park at the Hampstead Fair

Shopping like mommy does at the Laval Children's Museum

Playing at Fundomondo

Making sandcastles at the beach with Daddy.

And a shot of a very pregnant mommy at the beach wishing her bathing suit still fit.

Dear Baby

2011-06-30T20:50:00.003-04:00

Dear Baby,

I know that biologically you are entitled to a full 40 weeks in my body but I feel that 39 weeks is more than sufficient. My skin is stretched to its full capacity and I have not seen my feet in months, although considering how swollen they are I am sure it is better that way. My hips ache and I feel you have finished remodeling my body, rearranging my internal organs and kicking my sore ribs. According to the doctor and ultrasound tech you are in the 90% for size, which as your mother I feel is big enough, especially considering the current exit strategy. Speaking of which, your sister was not clear on how to accomplish this task so I hope you took better notes and are planning a much quicker exit. Your father has asked that you also consider vacating during daylight hours, apparently a 24 hour labor and 5am delivery was hard on him last time. So even though you are technically entitled to one final week in your current location we respectfully request your pack up your placenta and vacate as soon as possible.

Sincerely,

You tired sore mother

Rodeo in Montreal?

2011-06-04T20:07:00.011-04:00

Today we went to check out the "Rockin' Bull Rodeo" here in Montreal. I was excited to first know that they had bull riding in Montreal, and excited to take Missy to the Western Village to experience some of the rodeo festivities. As a native Calgarian, I love the Stampede. I went for 28 years in a row and it is something I wish I could share with my kids. Obviously, this little event was nothing compared to the Stampede but it had some of my favorite elements, mini doughnuts, animals, country music and sunshine.

For a small fair I have to say the midway food was spectacular, pretty much heaven for any pregnant lady. Even though I did not sample the pig it was pretty temping.

Missy won a toy in the fishing pond, and the super nice guy even let her pick her own toy.

There were lots of animals at the petting zoo.

And Missy's favorite part was the live bands and the dance floor. She was happy to watch all the people line dance and getting her grove on. She loved the country music, I guess she gets that from me.

While this was no Stampede it is amazing to see how many people in Montreal own cowboy hats and bad western wear (read leopard print and anything bedazzled) . I guess that is a universal feature at all rodeo events. There were a few things I am sure I never saw at other rodeos, Mexican wrestling masks and sexy naked photography booths.

I am often homesick and today I got a small taste of home (although it was all in French), to make it a little easier knowing that once again I will not make it home for the Stampede.

Friday

2011-06-03T15:55:00.000-04:00

Do you remember when Friday was flip up day? Life was so uncomplicated then. Monday was marriage day, Tuesday was toes day, Wednesday was wedding day, I don’t remember what Thursday was, but Friday was definitely flip up day. If you wore a skirt or a dress it was going to lifted up. I miss having such clearly defined rules.

Yesterday was officially my last day of work. Although I will be presenting at 2 conferences over the next 2 weeks, I am technically no longer employed. Although with 4 weeks to go I am trying to keep myself busy so I am not sitting around and waiting. I hate waiting, did I mention that I am not very patient. Did I also mention that it is starting to get hot and humid here in Montreal, making me a hot sticky swollen and grouchy pregnant lady.

Speaking of being a grouchy pregnant lady, I am starting to get really annoyed with random strangers comments. I was getting frozen yogurt the other night and I was bombarded by two very loud middle aged (possibly intoxicated) woman. The first informed that I should not be eating anything with sugar in it or my baby will be addicted. I think she was the intelligent one. The second less intelligent but louder one then started yelling “oh you must be having twins cause you are so freaking huge.” When I told her there was just one she made a weird face, then proceeded to ask how much longer I had to wait. I suggested it was not really her business, then she informed she was just being polite. If that was her being polite I would hate to see her being a jerk. Oh wait I think perhaps she confused the concept of being polite with being a jackass.

But yes I do feel huge. I feel like any minute now I may actually explode and I am quite sure that my skin can not stretch anymore. At my last appointment my doctor told me that according to the last ultrasound my baby is in the 90th percentile for size. Those are not comforting words when you realize that what goes in must eventually come out. Is it to late to change my mind?

Last week I celebrated my 32nd birthday. It was a great day, even though I had to work. My very kind lab mates baked me a cake and my sweet hubby cooked me a great dinner of seafood paella. My mom cleaned my house and bought me an ice cream cake. It was a pretty great day. Hooray for moms and hubbies! I really do not mind getting older, at least not right now. For me age means wisdom, experience and perspective, all of which are good things. Maybe when getting older means grey hair, wrinkles, liver spots, incontinence and dementia I will feel differently.

How do you feel about the parents who are keeping their childs gender a secret? I feel like they have too much free time. First, how you feel about gender is your issue not your childs issue, stop putting your bulls&*t on them. Your child exists in a world where there are little girls and little boys. Kids play with all sorts of toys, Missy plays hockey, cars, dinosaurs, dolls, kitchen and soccer. As a parent you can give your children access to all different kinds of toys, you don’t have to give them “girl toys” or “boy toys”, and you don’t have to dress them in pink or blue. You don’t have to buy into the stereotypes, as an adult that is your choice. But at some point they will figure out that they are a girl or a boy, and if they are the only kid in their class who does not understand that they will be “weird”. Sexuality can be confusing enough for kids and screwing them up at a young age is not fair. Secondly, performing mental experiments on your kids is wrong. There is a reason why psychologists need to get ethics approval for experiments. And finally, if you are so committed to making the world a better place for kids do something constructive, volunteer with a children’s charity, become a big brother or big sister, in short get a life.

Has my brian melted?

2011-05-18T09:18:00.004-04:00

Do you procrastinate? Of course you do, that is probably why you are here right now reading this very post. Lately I seem to be procrastinating way more than I should. With all the things going on, baby coming, ending work, impending move, lack of housing in new location etc, I should really be doing more productive things with my time. I think I am just so overwhelmed with all the things that need to be done I am having trouble starting. So I procrastinate. I read blogs, check out my favorite internet comics, I read the news, I watch the news (in case there are different stories), I check Craigslist and Kijiji for any great deals and then I spend some time on facebook. My procrastination program takes me about 30 minutes per day, which really does not seem like a lot of time, maybe I can work on doubling that.

It is cold and rainy outside this week and I think I am the only one who is not complaining. Yes it would be nice to be able to take Missy to the park after work to let her burn off some steam, but if it is cold and rainy it means that it is not hot and humid. I need to get through these last 6 - 8 weeks of pregnancy and hot and humid weather makes it pretty unbearable. The day Missy was born it was 42 degrees plus humidity. I spent most of the last month of that pregnancy sitting in a bathtub full of ice cold water. I guess living in the prairies all my life means that I am not cut out for humidity. I like a nice dry heat, desert like conditions suit me fine.

My child seems to think I am her personal Kleenex. She hates having dirty hands so she is constantly wiping them on my pants. She hates having a runny nose so she likes to wipe it on my shirt. I guess that is part of my new role as a mother, nurturer, provider, teacher, and Kleenex.

I think baby #2 has antlers. Either that or extra appendages that mysteriously don't show up on the ultrasounds. It feels like there is a constant dance party in my belly, and my poor bladder is the dance floor.

I am so happy that BBQ season is here. That is the best part of summer for me, grilled meat. Nothing tastes better to me than a grilled steak with corn on the cob and grilled peppers. I would like to live somewhere where I cold BBQ year around. If I could I would BBQ breakfast.

How do you feel about the outcome of the last election? Crazy right? I never thought I would see the day that the Bloc were defeated by the NDP. To bad this happened just as we are about to leave Quebec.

I went to a Mom-to-be baby fair on the weekend. There was a lot of stuff there that I probably would have bought the first time around had I seen it. Now I know better. Most of the stuff you think you need, you don't. And I definitely do not need a $1200 stroller. Although in our neighborhood it seems like you do if you want to fit in with all the other mommies. I did enjoy the lady who was trying to sell us detoxifying lotion to help suck all the toxins out of our bodies, to help us recover from pregnancy. When I inquired about how exactly this lotion accomplishes such a feat she informed me that it was literally a magnet for the toxins. I laughed and walked away. I wish I had no principles, it would make it easy for me to create a product like this one and take huge gobs of money from people who will apparently believe anything.

Yesterday I drove around for about 45 minutes listening to Raffi before I realized that I was alone in the car and yet I was still singing along to "this old man". Does this mean my brain has melted?

4 weeks of gainful employment left. That is it. After that I have no job, I will be a stay at home mom (for about 1 year). To answer the looming question, I have no idea what the hell to do next with my life. I want to continue to work in science, but in what capacity I have no idea. It does make me anxious and freak me out so please don't ask me what my plans are. I like having a job, I like having some independence and this move means a lot of changes for all of us, we will see how that all works out.

I am pretty sure that pregnancy has also melted my taste buds. I eat garlic constantly and can barely taste it. Yesterday I ate 3 whole cloves with dinner and could hardly notice. I am also enjoying this gross Nanimo bar frozen yogurt that I am pretty sure is only for pregnant ladies. It looks gross, in principle it should be gross but I can't stop eating it.

I guess it is time for me to do some real work today....or procrastinate for a little while longer. Maybe the weather forcast has changed since I started typing this.

What the heck happend?

2011-05-15T16:59:00.002-04:00

I have no idea what happened to my last post. It was there, it was a whole post and now it is gone. Mysteriously. I did not erase it, so what the heck happened. For those of you who did not read it, well it was witty and wonderful. Sorry, I guess I will have to try again this week.

I guess I am....

2011-04-01T11:08:00.000-04:00

My latest Netflix addiction is Mad Men. Hard to believe I had missed this show until now but thanks to the magic of internet I can watch all the episodes I want. I have to admit that the first few episodes had me wondering if I could actually watch the show. I have never once considered myself a feminist, but yet there I was getting annoyed and frustrated with the way they treated woman, they constant philandering and ignorant chauvinistic attitudes. Nevertheless I got sucked in and realized that I have never considered myself a feminist because I never had to be. My friend Susanne laughed when I said I was not a feminist, I guess what we feel we are and what we seem to others is never quite the same.

I was fortunate to grow up in a time and place where the antiquated ideas of woman be subservient to men have long been replaced. I never once in my life felt that my talents were limited to secretarial work or felt the pressure to be the perfect little housewife.

When I think about the perfect housewife, I think about my Grandma who recently turned 90. I think about how I have never once seen her in her bathrobe or pyjamas, with her hair undone or without makeup. She always woke up before the rest of us making sure breakfast was on the table. Her house was always perfectly clean, even though I never actually saw her clean it. I think she had fairies that worked at night. There was always fresh baked treats and goodies, in case company stopped by and everybody was always welcome in her home. She always taught me to make more food than you need, you don’t want anyone leaving your table hungry. There are a lot of qualities I admire in her and even though we are of completely different generations, with completely different lives I don’t want to criticize her life just because I have chosen a different path.

Interestingly, I have always considered myself to have somewhat conservative ideas. I knew that I wanted to have a family, and I love taking care of them. I love to cook, I find doing laundry relaxing, and sometimes I do wonder what it would be like to have a simpler life. I can bake and sew, talents fitting the average 1950’s housewife. If you only know me from work or school you would probably be surprised by these statements. If you have seen me drinking beer with the guys, or the summer I worked landscaping you would think the last thing I would want out of life is kids, a husband and my own special china pattern. If you have seen me speak at a conference or go on passionately about my work you would think that all I want out of life is to do science, but I know there is more and I want it. I guess I am a feminist because I do want it all. I want the great career, the great family and all the work that comes along with both.

It is hard to have both, somehow my mothers generation made it look so easy, but in reality it is not. I feel like my house is never clean, we are always searching for something and there is always something else I should be doing. It is just the reality of being a working mom, and I think I finally have come to terms with it. You won’t ever catch me doing housework in my best dress, and I don’t wake up with perfect hair. But I can run an expensive imaging system, I know how to culture and grow mammalian cells and I can bake kick ass bread. I have a lot of skills, but ironing is not one of them. Luckily I found a husband who can iron and does actually appreciate me for my brain, so I guess that makes me a feminist even if I never wanted to be one.

Fundametal Laws of Toddlers

2011-03-31T10:00:00.002-04:00

There are a few fundamental laws of science which are also excellent for describing parenting. Many people are aware of the basics of these laws but maybe not how they translate into real life examples.

“Objects in motion remain in motion unless acted upon by an opposing force”

Translation: Toddlers in motion will remain in motion until forced to go to bed.

“Objects at rest remain at rest unless acted upon by an opposing force”

Translation: Parents at rest will remain asleep until forced from their beds by crying children.

“Energy in an isolated system must be conserved; it is neither created nor destroyed
but converted from one form to another.”

Translation: All of the energy of the parents is transferred to the children. It is impossible for both parent and child to possess energy at the same time.

“In an isolated system the total mass must also be conserved”

Translation: What goes in must come back out. If you feed your children a lot of food, they will produce a lot of poop. Sadly conservation of mass also applies to vomit.

“For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction.”

Translation: This is the fundamental law of toddlers, what ever you tell them to do they will do the opposite.

Another great one to share

2011-03-16T09:25:00.002-04:00

Since I could not really sleep last night I was surfing the great wide internet and once again I landed on Craigslist and found this great posting in the barter section.

My soul for your RV or rustic cottage (Mtl)

THIS IS A VERY SERIOUS AD.

I am looking to trade my soul for a RV or Winnebago or cottage, inside which I could live.

The transaction would be all done on paper, to make everything legit. It would also be featured on a video art project.

About my soul:
-24 years of use, mileage done across North and Central Americas
-Had only one owner, female so in good condition
-Never been out in the winter, no rust, excellent working condition
-Has a few issues, but nothing expensive to get fixed
-very spontaneous and bubbly, but a tad deviant; quite colorful and sensitive!

Should you have any questions or concerns, please contact me ASAP.

Thank you.

I don't know about you but selling one's soul for an RV seems sort of well trashy? I mean I may consider selling my soul for a mansion, a few million dollars or a kingdom of my own, but for an RV, the most I would part with is a kidney.

On my mind

2011-03-15T20:20:00.005-04:00

What is going on in your life right now? Chances are something is wrong/broken/sad/scary/annoying or just plain crappy. It seems like everyone I know is going through some sort of "stuff" right now, and I guess I am no different. Then I turn on the tv and I see the devastation in Japan, the brave people trying to stop nuclear disaster with little regard for their own safety and it makes me feel like my problems are so petty. None the less, it is still weighing heavily on my mind, keeping me awake at night and since this is my venting space I will vent.

Right now I am having some professional issues at work. We received some great news that our two papers had been accepted into a fairly high profile journal. After we received this news one of the other authors decided that we should change the order of authors and that instead of me being first author on the second paper, that their student also deserved to be first author and is now pushing me to change the paper so we are co-first authors. For those not in the academic world, papers are our currency and being first author is significant. Being co-first authors is less significant, and this work is supposed to define my time as a Post Doc. I was shocked, the work was my idea and I spent over 2 years in the lab, many times working until midnight to pull this off and now that it is accepted and ready to publish it feels like they want to take away some of my effort. They keep assuring me they are not trying to "diminish my contributions", but I feel like it is a huge slap in the face. Mainly because of the way it has been handled. Waiting until the last minute and not really discussing it with me. Instead of the professor contacting me directly he is talking to everyone on the paper but me about the issue, and it is my paper. The worst part is that I feel this is starting to cause tension between my friend/co-worker and I, and potentially damage our relationship permanently, not to mention screw up our collaborations for the rest of my Post Doc.
I would like to think that we are past the whole sexism in the work place issue but part of me feels that maybe if I was man nobody would try and pull this s*&t on me. This is the part I hate about being a woman in the work place. If you stand up for yourself you are a bitch, but if you don't you are a push over. Now I am not a person who is easily pushed over, but for some reason I have an easier time fighting strangers than friends and people who know me well. I want to be fair and give people credit where they deserve, but I would like to think I deserve my fair share too. So right now I hate work, it feels hostile and uncomfortable. Instead of being happy and celebrating my accomplishments I am fighting over petty details and all of this has turned a paper I was proud of into a paper I just want to forget about.

Alright venting done. I know it small but it is my career and given all the uncertainty in my life right now I have to try and keep control over the things that I have control over.

In addition I am having some issues with our moving back west. We still do not know when we are moving, Dylan is still working on finishing up his research and the company he is working for on weekends has not given us a date of when he can start full time. No matter what I am staying to have the baby here, but it would be nice to know what is going on, and if we need to list our house for sale. Not to mention organizing moving our stuff and finding a new place to live. The housing market in Vancouver also keeps me up at night worrying about how we can afford a mortgage there, given that I don't have a job and have no idea what I will do when we move. Then there is the issue of leaving our friends and the life we have built here to start over again knowing nobody. I am a planner and right now there is no plan and that makes me anxious.

I have also had a lot more issues with this pregnancy than the last. I guess that is normal. My back is completely destroyed and some days I feel like I can barely get out of a chair without screaming in pain. I have also been getting weird pains in my lower regions and some spotting which have made my doctor a little nervous. She keeps telling me to slow down and do less, but that is not really possible right now. Then at my last check up my doctor said there was too much sugar in my urine and they are bumping up my glucose tolerance test to make sure it is not diabetes. I will be grateful when this baby is out safe and sound.

Anyways, enough about my petty issues. I am just having a down day, tomorrow will be better. I did find something the other day which made me laugh out loud. I was at the drug store buying bubble bath for Missy and I was checking out all the new products in the baby isle. One product in particular caught my eye. It was a tube of "Postpartum Restructuring Gel". Anybody who has had a baby knows how funny that is. Maybe when I was 16 a tube of gel for $24.99 would be sufficient to help restructure my post baby body, but at 32 I think I may need something a little bit more substantial. The kind of restructuring I need is more surgical and less snake oil. For now I think I will hit the treadmill and hope that helps a little.

So to all my friends who are dealing with their own "stuff" right now, I hope it gets better soon for you too!

Chernobyl

2011-03-07T13:56:00.000-05:00

This past weekend I got a real taste of what it was like to be a mom. I feel like I was christened and survived some right of passage. Missy and I were shopping in Ikea with my friend who is also pregnant and little miss decided to through an epic temper tantrum. I am talking a full blown Chernobyl style meltdown. There was screaming, yelling, crying, and a lot of dirty looks. The worst thing about having your kid meltdown in Ikea is trying to get out of Ikea. That place is a freaking maze to begin with let alone when you are flustered, and trying to haul your kid through the maze, bloody hell that was fun. The best part was the looks, as though I was doing this on purpose and I was enjoying it, just there to screw up everybody’s Saturday morning. You could tell they were impressed I was having another kid, I could actually feel people mentally pooling their money to help pay for my sterilization. But we survived, we got home and eventually the tears stopped, she took a nap and then forgot all about it, I wish my memory was that short. In the afternoon we even managed to get to Walmart and run a few errands. I guess those are more her people. I think I am going to need lots of advice on how to deal with toddlers because I feel like I just figured out my baby and now I have this whole new species to deal with.

While I was at Walmart I saw a huge display for Coke Zero. They advertise it as having zero calories, but that seems a little bit crazy don’t you think? The only thing I know of that has zero calories is water, and I am fairly sure there is more than water in those cans. There is a lot of stuff (chemicals) in those cans and it should scare people that somehow it all adds up to zero calories.

Speaking of advertising why do they spend so much money advertising Viagra and Cialis? I am 100% sure that any man in North America who is having trouble getting it up, or keeping it up knows that there is a little pill you can take to fix that. Sex is fun and it feels good so I am also very sure that most of these men would definitely go to the doctor to get a prescription if they needed it. So really why spend so much money on stupid commercials. Wouldn’t that money be better spent on research for new more important drugs?

We are also in the middle of another winter storm and the guy we pay to plow our driveway did not show up again this morning. Instead of trying to dig out our massive driveway Dylan decided to throw Missy in her sled and haul her to daycare Eskimo style and I trudged off to the Metro. There is one thing about snow that causes people to loose most of their common sense. First of all there is a basic property of physics which states that two bodies can occupy the same space. It is pretty much impossible for two people or cars to be in exact the same physical space unless one of those people/cars crushes the crap out of the other one. Thus if people are on the metro we have to let those people off before we try to get onto the metro. This also applies to cars, if a car is in the intersection blocking the intersection it is physically impossible for us to drive our car into the intersection no matter how many times and how long you honk your horn. Snow makes people stupid. Hopefully winter is over soon!

The one thing I love about taking the Metro is the happy girl who works at Second Cup. I love her, she makes my morning. Everyday she is smiling she knows what I want without asking, she knows me. I like that, it makes me feel special if even for 1 second. As a mom (and lab mom) I spend so much of my day doing things for other people, preparing their favourite things, buying their favourite groceries and listening to their wants and needs. So I love having someone who knows exactly what I want.

Another thing that makes me happy these days is my family when Missy is not being a total tyrant she is very funny! She makes us laugh, and that makes it all worth it.

Best personal ad ever

2011-02-25T23:28:00.002-05:00

So I was posting an add on Craigslist looking for a digital cable receiver and came across this charming personal add listed in the wanted section...

Men seeking women (montreal)

"need a girl/women below 33 for dating.romance and sex.girl should be beautyful"

That is definitely the worst personal add I have seen ever. First of all, if you are looking for a girl you should by a boy, not a man. Second of all, if your use of punctuation and spelling leaves much to be desired. Thirdly, if you are searching for a woman in the wanted adds of Craigslist, I don't think you get to be picky.

Although now I am super curious and totally wish I could see what type of person would post this, and what type of person would respond....

Stuff and a few life lessons

2011-02-24T15:04:00.002-05:00

It has been pointed out to me that I have not blogged in a long time. Frankly I blame work. There is so much stuff going on in the lab and work is seriously cutting into my procrastination time. On the upside we had four positive reviews for our two papers and now I am busy doing a few revisions so we can get them off my desk.

Well enough about work. There has been lots going on lately, my mom was here for a week so Dylan and I got out for a few date nights. Now that I know I have only a few more months before the baby I am determined to get out as much as we can. Speaking our the little baby we found out last week that we are having a boy. That’s right, there is a teeny tiny penis growing inside of me as we speak. Sort of strange really. Before Missy came along I was sure I only wanted boys, but then Missy came along and now it is hard to imagine raising a little boy. Is it really that different than a little girl? Having a boy does mean that I need to sort through and get rid of 18 months worth of pink clothes. I don’t mind my son wearing pink, but I am sure he would be angry if I forced him to wear dresses. But then again he is the second child so that means there will be almost zero photographs of him and thus no evidence of my crimes.

It also seems that the terrible twos have arrive a little early at our house. It seems that basic everyday things like putting on diapers, getting dressed, getting out of the bath and putting on boots and coats now require a huge amount of fuss, kicking and screaming, mostly from Missy. I can’t wait for this phase to be over, I am running out of cleaver bribes and patience.

One thing I have been doing is watching a lot of t.v. Mostly because I can do it while I process data, a necessary tool in maintaining sanity. This morning I was watching Canada AM while I plugged away and learned about two very important things 1) throwing an Oscar party and 2) buying towels and sheets at a whites sale. One would think with all the unrest and turmoil in the Middle East that we could fill 10 minutes of air time with real news but instead there was some muppet talking about different thread counts and weaves of towels. First of all I don’t know anyone who would spend $140 for 2 pillow cases, whether they are 800 thread count or not. I buy my sheets and towels at Walmart, they do there job. I also don’t know a single person who throws Oscar parties, let alone spends all day preparing movie inspired dishes and cocktails. I wish I had that kind of spare time.

I have also been enjoying my Netflix account. I have fallen in love with the show Damages. Seriously, its great show and I am totally addicted. In case you have never heard of the show it is a legal drama, but not the Law & Order kind of drama. Each season focuses on 1 major case and I have learned one important thing, men are stupid. Sorry guys, but it seems that each of the major players ends up in jail because they tell way too many secrets to their hookers, girlfriend and boy toys. So important life lesson is hookers are not always trustworthy.

Another important life lesson I learned this week is that grocery shopping with your spouse is a bad idea. Actually I learned this lesson a long time ago which is why you would never see Dylan stocking the isles of Loblaws. But today I was reminded of this lesson as I cruised around and witnessed not one but 3 full on domestics. Who knew pickles were so controversial. Maybe I need to stop shopping at the grocery store that shares a parking lot with a strip club. Which by the way is surprisingly busy for a Thursday at 1pm (the strip club, not the grocery store).

I have also found a new recipient for the jack ass of the week award. I have been taking the metro the last few weeks because we can not really access our parking spot. Now I took metro every day during my last pregnancy and long ago gave up the idea that people were considerate enough to offer you a seat. And considering some of my earlier rants about using pregnancy to get extra benefits I have gotten used to standing on the metro. However, I do think that when you push past the pregnant lady who is waiting for people to get off the metro before rushing on, knocking her into the door and then taking the seat she was about to sit on, you are a jack ass. To his credit after receiving many dirty looks from other riders and what sounded like a scolding from another older lady he did offer me the seat. However, I feel he was still very deserving of the JAW.

Anyways that is life these days. Potty training, working, laundry, dishes and cooking. Hopefully work will slow down soon so I can get back to my regular rants and raves. Oh and hopefully some belly pictures soon too.

You can't judge a book....

2011-01-26T13:56:00.006-05:00

Battle Hymm of the Tiger Mother, unless you have been living under a rock you have undoubtedly heard about this book. You have probably read the shocking list of things that Amy Chua would not let her two daughters do. No playdates, no sleepovers, no boyfriends, and no instruments besides the violin or piano. Her kids have had to study and work hard, she insists that they be the best at what ever they do. These tenants have seemed to divide the parenting world into two camps. Those who are horrified by her strict totalitarian style, aghast at her attempts to crush her children’s sprit and intensely disgusted by the fact she would dare write a book about this style of parenting. After all what qualifies a law professor to write about parenting, that is typically left up to those with specialized degrees in child education, psychologist and paediatricians. Then there are those who are less horrified, less offended and some who even support the style of parenting that Ms. Chua writes about. This massive difference in parental opinion has sparked many openly hostile editorials in news papers, many sensationalized articles, and many comment wars on blogs.

Now I have read many excerpts from her book and I have talked with someone who has actually read this book and I feel that Ms. Chua has been drastically misquoted. Journalists often sensationalize an article to make more “sexy”, make it more interesting for the reader. This is what they do. I see this many times with science articles. There is often a drastic difference between what is written by the scientists in the articles they publish in peer reviewed journals and the blurb that is printed in the paper written by a journalist. This is simply the nature of media. It is all about context, and if you take something out of context you can spin it any way you choose by carefully selecting your words. From what I can tell so far Amy Chua’s book has suffered from just such sensationalistic writing. Headlines in the Globe and Mail including “Confessions of a Tiger Mom: Why Chinese parenting is best”, suggesting that her book is a slam at north American parenting styles. In fact it is not, she is not saying that what she did is best. As far as I can tell from what I have read so far, she wrote book in a semi-humorous manner openly questioning her parenting style. She is not a racist, she is not a lunatic and she is most definitely not a bad parent. I am currently waiting for my copy to be shipped from Amazon so that I can more accurately comment on the contents of the book. Why would I do this, well I feel that we can not judge her based on what Journalists write about her, we can only judge her based on her words and the only way I will know what she has actually said is to read the book myself. This is how I judge the quality of scientific material, I read the original journal article in the journal it was published rather than relying on a third or forth hand account of the content. I guess that is what 14 years of university has done to me, it has made me aware of the value of the source.

Now without reading her book I do wish to make one comment for all those people who are on both sides of the argument to consider (I know this is dangerous territory). To use a strange metaphor there are many ways to skin a cat, and I believe this old saying can be applied to parenting. There are no “rules” or “guidelines” to parenting it is only dogma. We often raise our children in a manner that is similar to how we were raised ourselves, both culturally and religiously. So consider this scenario for a second. If your family moved to a foreign country when you were young, which had very different cultural values than here. Lets for example say they moved to a country where it was not common for girls to be educated. Your parents being raised in Canada decided to send you to school so that you will be educated, or educate you at home, but either way ensure that you were educated the same way they were. You end up being successful and you marry someone in that culture and have children of your own, for this exercise it must be a girl. You would likely wish your girl to be educated the way your were, the way your parents raised you. You would push and fight for what you believed to be correct despite the vastly different cultural perspective pervasive in the country that you live in. It worked for you and therefore it should work for your children. I believe this is how many adult children of first generation immigrants feel. They were typically raised according to the cultural beliefs that their parents brought with them to Canada (or the US), and in turn then struggle to raise their children by balancing these beliefs with north American parenting methodology. This is the reality of living in a country like Canada, we have many different cultures, religions which will also impact how people parent their kids. We can’t expect that people adopt our mythology of parenting because they come to our country, we don’t ask them to give up their language, religion or ethnicity so why do we expect they will parent their kids the way we decide they should? All over the world children are raised in different ways and the end result is more or less the same, they grow up, they get jobs and they become parents themselves. There are successful people in every culture and there are unhappy people in every culture and we do not have enough information to correlate this level of happiness with parenting styles, so why fight about it.

You will notice that I have deliberately tried to avoid giving my opinion of her parenting style, for one reason. It is irrelevant, she is not raising my children and her parenting style does not personally affect me in any way. You don’t have to like the parenting style of Amy Chua, you don’t have to agree with how she raised her daughters. You and I don’t have to agree on how to raise our children but we do owe each other some level of respect and understanding. It is not easy being a parent. You make decisions and you choices and the results of those decisions and actions may not be evident for many years. You do what you think is best and only hope that it is the right decision. However, I can assure you that both Amy Chua and I want many of the same things, we want our children to be happy, healthy, responsible, successful and to achieve as much as they can in life.

As for what qualifies Ms. Chua, a law professor to write a book about parenting. Well nothing really, aside from the fact she is a parent and can write. But what qualifies Jenny McCarthy to advocate on behalf of the anti-vaccine movement? She is not a doctor or a qualified scientist. Do you feel more comfortable taking parenting advice from an a former Playboy Bunny than Amy Chua? When I have finished the book I will be happy to lend it out to anyone who wishes so that they may also make an informed opinion on the book. Until then I hope that more people remember another famous saying, you can’t judge a book by its cover.

Just Because I Can

2011-01-19T19:53:00.003-05:00

Well it has been almost one whole month, but today we said good-bye to Grandma and we reclaimed our house. While I do love Dylan's family, and appreciate all the help they gave us over the holiday, I am currently enjoying having the whole house to myself. Dylan is out for dinner with some co-workers, Missy is tucked in her bed and I am in my pajamas at 7 pm sitting on the couch watching some garbage t.v. I am pretty much in heaven right now. The only thing that would make this moment better would be a really large bag of all dressed chips. With this baby all I want to eat is garlic and salt. I don't want fruit, popsicles, ice cream, chocolate, or sweets of any kind, all I want is salt and more salt. Maybe it means this one will be a boy? I guess we will find out in a couple of weeks.

Even though 99% of me is enjoying my empty house there is a small part of me that will miss having Dylan's mom around. I get the appeal now of the sister wife. It was nice having another female around to put down toilet seat, refill the toilet paper, do the dishes, fold the laundry and fill u the Brita. Although long term logistics of this arrangement are not pretty, it was nice while it lasted.

Speaking of refilling the toilet paper, ladies do you ever wonder why you are the only one who seems to refill the roll? Well according to my husband men don't use much toilet paper. He claims that before me he would buy 1 large 12 roll package and it would last one year. I was immediately skeptical. So in true myth busters fashion we set out to prove that men in fact use more than one roll per month of toilet paper. Having two rolls turned out to be much to complicated, mainly because my many trips to the bathroom half asleep in the middle of the night kept screwing up the study. So we kept track of the number of sheets used over a week period and then extrapolated to a month. As it turns out he was not lying. Either that or he was using my bath towel. Men do not use nearly as much toilet paper as we ladies do. So it would only be natural for them not to notice the roll is almost empty. Man I hate it when I am wrong.

I was also apparently wrong in thinking this second pregnancy would be easier. Not sure why I was so delusional, but I was. I guess I did not factor in a grouchy sick toddler, grouchy reviewers, and less time for sleep when I imagined how this would all go down. Some people love being pregnant, me not so much. I love the end result, but the whole process does not really appeal to me. Not to mention I am watching my middle expand faster than a balloon and people just love to point out how big I am getting. Seriously, wanna see me cry?

Speaking of crying, the hormones have turned on the water works. I can't watch tv now without crying. It used to be just the really sad sick and dying kids commercials that got to me but now I can't watch a diaper commercial without needing a tissue. Bloody hell.

Anybody else get Netflix? We did and I love it. I sit in a very dark room and click buttons sometimes for 8 hours straight. It is mind numbing and insane, so I watch movies/tv to keep me from loosing what is left of my marbles. I discovered a tv. series called Thirty Something. Super great show as long as you get past the bad 80's clothes and hair. Seriously the fashion makes me cry a little. Anyways, being that I am currently thirty something, have a hubby and a kid this show is pretty easy to relate to, well almost. For some reason those people still seem more like adults than I do, and definitely more adult than most of our friends. I look at them and I know "I don't dress like that", "I don't talk like that", and then I wonder is it just me or does everyone feel that way. It is sort of like when you were younger and watched 90210 on tv, thinking that is what teenagers looked and acted like, and then you became a teenager and you were skinny, with no boobs, and people thought you looked 11 when you were 15. I know there is something called body dysmorphic disorder, maybe I have age dysmorphic disorder.

Well I have used up enough of my time and yours so I am going to go and run around my house half naked (too cold for full naked), just because I can.

Payment for the future

2011-01-16T21:27:00.004-05:00

When I found out that I was having a daughter I was a little terrified. Not terrified of a small little girl, but terrified of the crazy ass teenager she would become. I was a teenage girl once, I was a total nightmare and I am not sure how my parents handled it. As Missy gets older I have come to realize that she is very stubborn, very strong willed and she does not like being told what to do. I know that in a decade or so I will be paying for all the crap I put my parents through. So in payment for that future hell I feel it is my purgative to dress my daughter up in crazy costumes, stupid hats and take pictures so that later in life I can embarrass her.

Missy and her two besties had a tutu party. It was fun, we dressed them up and they played. At first Missy was not too sure about the whole thing but eventually she gave up the fight.

Missy is definitely not a girly girl.

2 day pass

2011-01-14T19:18:00.000-05:00

What is the best thing you can give to two very tired parents of a busy toddler? No sadly it was no a live in maid or butler, but Dylan's parents did give us a 2 day pass to go and enjoy ourselves and that is pretty much as good as it gets around here. So we decided to spend a few days in Tremblant enjoying some much needed rest and relaxation. Obviously I am not in the condition to hit the slopes but we figured we could find lots of things to occupy ourselves.

However, like most of Dylan and my vacation attempts this little trip was not without its share of fun. After spending 3.5 hours sitting on the highway which was closed because of a fire we finally checked into Le Grand Lodge. It was a fabulous hotel! They had their own little skating rink, a pool, a hot tub, an amazing restaurant, a huge stone fireplace, a whiskey lounge, cookies and hot chocolate in the lobby, and free nachos in the lounge. Any place that serves free cookies and nachos is basically heaven to me. Due to our much later than planned arrival we opted to check out the hotel restaurant and were not disappointed. Dylan enjoyed a rack of lamb while I tried ostrich for the first time. The French really know what to do with food. After dinner we curled up by the fire and enjoyed the live entertainment in the whiskey lounge.

We curled up in our big bed, with the clean sheets and pillows and slept for about 11 straight hours. I was pretty sure this place was indeed paradise until I tried to shower the next morning and there was no hot water. After 2 hours of phone calls and service people verifying that indeed we had absolutely no hot water we were finally relocated to a different room. For all the hassle they upgraded us to a suite complete with kitchen, soaker tub, fireplace and 2 bathrooms. I love checking into a hotel room which has more bathrooms than our house. It was so nice that I had to take a picture.

I am not sure when I will get over being wowed by nice hotel rooms, maybe never. Maybe it is the freshly made bed that I know I don't have to deal with, the clean sheets I know I don't have to wash, and the toilets I know I don't have to clean. Best of all our new room had hot water so we could finally shower. By noon we were on our way to the upper village of Tremblant for lunch.

We wandered around, drank coffee, sat by the outdoor fires and just enjoyed having nothing to do. 2 years ago, having nothing to do would have pretty much drove me crazy but I have learned to appreciate these times now, so we did nothing for a while. After doing nothing we went back to the hotel for cookies, hot chocolate and ice skating, went for a sleight ride, went for dinner and then enjoyed more live music.

Sadly the next morning we had to pack up and leave our little paradise. Don't get me wrong we were happy to see out little Missy again but really I could have used another day.

A new year and some new goals

2011-01-01T20:59:00.002-05:00

So it seems that the holidays are almost over, and it is already 2011. It is that time of year once again to let go of old grievances to make room for fresh ones, or something like that. I was there at midnight to watch the ball drop, I celebrated with friends and family, I even had a sip of champagne, but like most of 2010, new years eve was a total blur. In fact most of our holidays have been a blur, a lovely fun blur.

I had the stomach flu.
We had a busy Christmas day with Grandma, Grandpa and Uncle Dan.
We had a fun afternoon at the park skating, Missy loved it.
I put skates on for the first time in 20 years (it was funny).
We cooked a crazy amount of food.
We ate a stupefying amount of food.
I baked 12 loaves of bread.
I did some much needed clothes shopping.
We did some minor plumbing jobs.
We had some naps.
We played some Wii.
We went to the park.
We went to the market.
Dylan and I went for a romantic dinner.
We cooked and cooked and cooked more food.
We ate.
We had 2 New Years Eve celebrations, one for the kiddies and one for the kiddie-less friends.
We attended 3 holiday parties.
We are tired.
I got a cold.

So as you see it was a packed mostly with food and food related activities, which is pretty standard for us yuppie foodie types. The holidays just seem like a good excuse to go totally overboard and make ridiculous dishes we never would attempt when we have to work rather than spend the day in the kitchen. The holidays also seem like a great reason to forget all about normal nutrition and just eat everything you can imagine, gingerbread cookies, cheeses, ice cream, chips, all of which make excellent holiday breakfast choices. So that is pretty much what my holidays were, celebrating the end of the stomach flu by eating everything and anything we could find. It was gloriously fun, but I feel that maybe with the new year some new restraint is definitely in order.

Which brings me to the idea of New Years resolutions. Do you make them? I don't. I used to when I was younger and really had nothing to resolve. Aside from my bad fashion sense, terrible choice in make up colors and boyfriends. Now that I have real issues (I actually prefer to call it character traits), real bad habits, and real things that I should resolve, I am not all that interested in making resolutions. Mostly because I don't like to fail, so if I don't make any crazy promises than nobody will feel disappointed. Instead I like to set some goals for myself. This way if I do succeed in achieving my goal everyone is happy, if I don't well there is always next year. Its a subtle difference but I think it makes sense.

1. Ask for help when its needed. I am not great at this but I am working on it. Mainly because sometime in the last 16 months I have come to the distinct realization that I am not superwoman. So occasionally, I do ask for help, although usually I wait until I am past the end of my rope grasping at treads. So this year my goal is buck up and ask for help before I loose it.

2. Surrender some control. This is very hard for super type A control freak-a-holics like me but for the sake of my sanity I have to get better at this. Especially if I follow through with goal #1. Its hard to understand why people don't fold the laundry the way I do (because my system makes the most natural logical sense), why they don't do the dishes the way I do (again, my way is pretty much perfect), and why they use a boning knife to cut squash (because that is just crazy), but I am working on it.

3. Exercise more. Now that the puking/super tired/generally crappy phase of this pregnancy is over hopefully I can get back to a more regular exercise schedule. While nausea is a great weight loss strategy, I am fairly sure that I would rather spend a few hours on the treadmill instead.

4. Clean my bathroom more frequently. Its horrible and nobody wants to do it, but I do have to remember that I am the adult and that means I have to clean the bathroom even if I would rather eat sand. I hate it when I realize that I am the adult and nobody is coming to do all the adult things for me.

5. Watch less t.v. (notice how I did not say give up t.v, that would be totally insane and crazy). I am addicted to watching t.v. and now that we have Netflix it is not getting easier. But I feel like I need to spend less time watching other people's lives and more time living my own.

Those are all great goals but until Monday I am still on holidays and until then I don't have to make any drastic changes. I think I'll watch some more t.v. and finish off the gingerbread cookies while mentally refolding all the towels in the closet.

Merry Christmas to All

2010-12-25T09:56:00.000-05:00

From our little family to yours...

Merry Christmas!

Holiday Spirit

2010-12-21T21:29:00.004-05:00

Wow it is 4 days before Christmas and I am 100% totally unprepared. I did manage to get all the presents bought and wrapped and we did manage to get the tree up but there is no holiday baking, no clean house, no clean laundry and my in laws show up in 3 days. Am I panicking? Not really, and why is that you may wonder. Well I am way to nauseous and tired to care about the piles of crap everywhere, and right now I am finding it hard to get dressed in the morning let alone muster up my holiday spirit. Hopefully the next few weeks will bring this period of stomach unrest to and end so I can finally enjoy some holiday festivities.

Cleaver readers may have noticed a new feature on the blog and we are pretty excited to finally be able to tell people that we will be adding to your little family. If all goes well we should meet the newest McGuire sometime in late June or early July.

So in case I do not get back to blogging before Saturday, Merry Christmas to all my buddies in blogger land. I hope you have a wonderful time filled with family, friends, good food and lots of cheer.

JAW By Request

2010-12-08T20:22:00.003-05:00

So my lovely friend Z has asked me to award the coveted JAW to her downstairs neighbour. Since I happen to agree with her, and feel that I should not be the only one to pass out this award I am happy to oblige. In fact I am dedicating this weeks JAW to awful neighbours.

Contestant #1 - Madame Z's downstairs neighbour, lets call them the Butthead's. So today the Butthead's told her to find a solution so that her 15 month old daughter wouldn’t make "ANY noise". First of all, child services is very much against tying up your children or locking them in a padded cells all day so that is pretty much out. Bubble wrap is fun, but suffocation is not and begging is just sad. Second, how much bloody noise can a 15 month old who weights 22lbs make. Sure they may drop the occasional toy, cry when they fall down, or run around a little, but its their house and that is what kids do. Finally, kids make noise during the day. Most kids including the lovely little miss T, are in bed pretty early so it is not like they are keeping you up all night playing their music and watching their tv with the volume on the highest setting, having loud sex or throwing crazy parties. I have asked our downstairs neighbours on many occasions if baby A bothers them, and they said they can barely hear her, and trust me she is a rowdy little monkey. So here is the deal, if you live in a building you can expect things like children, and pets to possibly occupy said building, deal with it.

Contestant #2 - My lovely friend S's downstairs pot smoking teenage neighbour. I realize that after my above statement this may sound a little hypocritical, but my feelings about children do not extend to teenagers. After a certain age you know what is acceptable behavior and just because you hate the world it does not mean that you need to be a complete a-hole. Okay so back the award. These pot smoking crazy druggie teenage neighbours have done a few things recently which could have put them in contention for the award but the last stunt is definitely the best. They often return home from work and blast their music for a few hours, something S and her family always enjoy. Well this past week the music continued all night long. S, finally sent her hubby down to ask them to turn it off and there was no answer at the door. They spoke to the building manager who phoned them and said there was no answer. Finally the mom came home and turned off the music. The dumbass had left for the night leaving the music blaring. Definitely jackass behavior. The only consultation is that if you are too out of it to realize that their is music blasting when you go to leave the house you are probably too out of it to remember to put on a coat, here's hoping.

So it is a toss up, which of these awesome neighbours deserves this award more?

What's your definition?

2010-12-07T20:21:00.005-05:00

I recently read an interesting blog post by one of my favorite online persona's, Dr. Isis. In the post she was adding her 2 cents to the debate about whether or not scientists should support science cheerleaders. While I did not have the same experiences as she did growing up, I do agree with her premise (and even thought peppy people annoy the crap out of me). I think that anything that helps to encourage all young people (girls included), to consider science as a career is a good idea. There are many opportunities to glamorize certain careers in the media, doctors, nurses, teachers, lawyers, and reporters are careers that most young people can identify. However, rarely do young children realize that scientist is a potential career. Even members of my own family still have a hard time understanding what I do, until a few years ago my Grandma told people I was in medical school. It is not as though they do not want to be supportive, they just have a hard time understanding that I basically "think" and "play with chemicals" for a living. So I do support science cheerleading, I am happy that there are young, energetic, "normal" (not freaky lab coat and coke bottle glasses wearing), people who want to rally interest in science. I think that in addition to bringing awareness to science it helps to break down the preconceived barriers that science is only for super nerds.

Reading some of the comments and opposing view points has made me re-consider the idea of modern feminism. What I think it means, and do I consider myself a feminist. As a female in the physical sciences I am a minority, but I can honestly say that in my 14 years of post secondary life that I have never really felt as thought I had been a victim of discrimination based on my sex. In fact, I feel that being a woman has opened many doors for me because there is such an effort to encourage woman to progress in the physical sciences. During my undergrad I had one particular professor who was constantly cutting out articles from journals about successful woman scientists. The department I was in was an older department with only 2 female professors and he wanted to make sure I knew that I could achieve anything I wanted. He was a soft spoken elderly man who you would probably mistake for any other grandfather, from a generation when woman did not really work or go into careers like chemistry. Some members of that generation may suggest that I go find a nice husband and forget about learning complicated theories, but I never experienced that. In all 4 of the Universities I have worked in I have only ever encountered encouragement, sometimes to the point of nausea. In fact I have even had people tell me that as a woman in the physical scientists it is my duty to keep going to be an example and role model for the next generation. I continually receive these lectures from both female and male professors, suggesting that because I chose to get a PhD I must be some sort of super feminist who is responsible for fate of woman in physical scientists. More so recently because people know I am trying to decide on what to do next.

These discussions have sometimes left me frustrated because it seems that while the workplace has evolved to accept all woman, the ideas of feminism have not. While I am thankful for all the hard working dedicated ladies who have came before me blazing bras in hand, I feel that their definitions of what constitutes a feminist is a little antiquated. According to some self professed feminists if I choose to put my career on hold to raise my kids I could not possibly be a feminist. I can only be a feminist if I unapologetically put my career ahead of my family. I have to bring home the bacon, cook it, cut in tiny bite sized pieces for the kids, and then clean the pan when I am done. Anybody else feel a little exhausted, I do?

To me feminism is about breaking the mold not forcing people into a different one. In my mind modern feminism is about choice. The choice to do what works best for you and possibly your family without feeling as though you are some how selling your soul for a new set of pots and pans. If a lawyer decides to stop practicing law to be a mom that does not diminish her previous accomplishments, and more importantly it does take away from her current and future intellect. I know many smart and talented woman who have became stay at home mothers and in my mind they are still the strong capable woman they have always been. Choice is power, and we are lucky enough to live in a country at a time when woman can make these choices. I hope that when my daughter grows up she knows that she can do what ever she wants, and whether she chooses a traditional role at home or to work full time she can do so without having to justify her choices.

So cheer on science cheerleaders. You have made the choice to promote science in a way that you enjoy and that does not diminish your capabilities as a female or a scientist.

I got questions....

2010-12-02T21:27:00.004-05:00

This has been one doozey of a week. Missy has her second major ear, nose and throat infection in less than one month. Needless to say she has been cranky, clingy and down right sad. Both Dylan and I seem to still be battling this pesky cold that just won't leave, and we both have way too much work to do. We currently have what I call a survival plan in place. Dylan works in the morning, then I work in the afternoon, we eat dinner and then we both work once we get Missy in bed. Since she does not stay sleeping very long (due to the aforementioned infection fun) we then take turns rocking and holding her until she goes to sleep. Luckily she seems to be getting slightly better but it looks like we will be stuck inside for another weekend. Today was the first time I left the house since Monday and needless to say I am getting a little punchy with cabin fever. When Missy is passed out on me at 3 am and I am sitting there staring at the ceiling it is amazing what sorts of things pop into your head.

Who - Who writes the annoying scripts that telemarketer's read to you on the phone. I understand it is your job to read the script so I am not annoyed at you, even though I continually say "I am not interested". I am annoyed at the marketing major who thinks that by saying things like "we understand you may already have insurance, but we are offering you extra insurance," will some how change my mind. And when I reject that offer, continue with yet another statement, "you know Mrs. X you can never really have too much insurance." Well actually I am sure you can, if you have more than you need its to much. I have what I need so please piss off and put some exlax in your boss's lunch just for making you be super annoying.

What - What is up with the new Sesame Street? Is it me or does it sort of suck. Maybe it was my five year old underdeveloped brain which thought it was the greatest show ever. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, tweeeelllve. I know you just sang that in your head and you totally still see the little ball moving through the pinball machine, or what ever that was. Anyways, I feel the new Sesame street is not a cool as the old one. However, I am a little amazed that some of the same characters are still on the show. Sadly some of them did not age very well. Bob is not looking so hot, but I am pretty sure Gordon looks exactly the same as he did when I was a kid. And Maria, she is still pretty hot, but poor Luis is looking a little old. Just an observation.

When - When do I get to win the lottery? That is a good question. I sometimes buy a ticket and I would sometime like to win some money. I am not greedy, I don't need a lot of money a million or two would do just fine.

Where - Where are all the socks going? I have a very large ever growing pile of single mismatched socks that seem to have been abandoned by their mates. Are they too ugly, to old, to boring? Or did their mates take up with another sock, just to be different. Are there all this mixed pattern coupled socks secretly sneaking around my house enjoying their elicit behavior.

Why - Why is it not possible for my husband to dress my kid. Of course he is physically able to dress her, but she always ends up looking like a crazy hippy. Orange pants with multicolored teal striped shirts. And it seems that my amazing husband is not the only one. You can always tell a kid that a dad dressed, they don't match, and they may or may not be wearing seasonal appropriate clothing. What I find the most funny about this is that dad's often dress themselves. And in my husbands case, he is quite good at dressing himself, so I know he understands how to match clothes. I guess dad's just don't care about "outfits" and what matches, they just go for what is on top of the drawer. Or maybe mom's just care too much, because I am pretty sure little Missy does not give a crap what she is wearing.

Pass the placenta

2010-11-30T22:27:00.003-05:00

Just when I thought I had read it all, I found this gem on today's Craigslist.

Hello,
My name is Kim.
I have recently moved here from Vancouver.

I am a graduate from UBC. I am currently awaiting admission into a post-graduate school to become a Naturopathic Physician.
I have been trained by friends and midwives, who offer a service to new mothers to process their placentas into pill form for easier ingestion.

I have included a link from a company based out of LA. I am not affiliated with them, but they have some useful information.
http://www.placentabakery.com/

I can offer references.
Please contact me for more information.

Thank-you
Merci

It is hard to even know what to say except gross and ewwww! Oh and I don't know about you ladies but when I was a new parent I was to busy sleeping, feeding my kid, and changing diapers to worry about grinding up my placenta and turning it into pills.

Pregnancy is not a Handicap

2010-11-27T21:39:00.004-05:00

People can really make me mad. I case you are new here, I rant about people a lot. And it has been a long time since I felt the need to award the Jack Ass of the Week award. Mainly because I was too busy working and avoiding society. However today I found the queen of all Jack Asses at my favorite Jack Ass viewing location, Walmart, of course.

So this whole thing actually started with me trying to do a good deed. I was pushing Missy in the cart through the parking lot and I saw a baby in a stroller and a shopping cart full of stuff behind a car parked in a handicap space. Now I often help people load groceries into their cars and I was thinking, "wow, this person probably needs help with a baby and all the groceries". Just as I was saying "do you need help with your bags," a woman about my age walked around the car and picked up the baby.
She looked at me confused and said "no why would I." I stared at her and then asked "are you even handicapped?" She stared at me again like I was crazy and said "no I have a baby and I don't feel like walking."

I was stunned, I stood there thinking many many things. Seriously, you don't feel like walking. You have two functional legs and you don't feel like walking an extra 30 feet. And oh you have a baby, congratulations you are the first woman in the world to have a baby, you definitely deserve to park in the handicapped space.

I reminded her that those spaces are meant for people who actually can't walk, who don't have the luxury of choosing if they feel like walking that day. And her response was "well you know how it is with kids."

Um hello, do you see me standing here with my kid in the cart. Do you see every other parent in the parking lot. All of us actually parked legally. I could not help myself I just blurted out "you are a horrible person and you are going to teach your child to be a horrible person."

I won't say I am proud of my last response, yes it was harsh but really it is Christmas shopping season, the parking lot is full and you take a handicapped space. In my mind that makes you a pretty horrible person. You should be grateful that you are healthy and able to walk across a parking lot. You should be glad that you don't need to use that space.

I thinking about my encounter while I slowly navigated the crowd at Walmart and I actually feel like those new family and pregnant lady parking spaces may be partially to blame. When I first saw those, I thought what a good idea. And yes in theory if you are very pregnant and you have small children it is nice to have a parking space close to the door, but really does it make that much of a difference? And yes I have used these spaces, although Dylan would never let me use them when I was with him. His philosophy was that he was there to help me and that space should be left for someone who really needs it. After that I felt so guilty that until I was 8 months pregnant I would not use those spaces at all. And I have actually witnessed people fighting over these spaces when just 3 spaces over there was 2 vacant spots.

There seems to be some confusion around these sorts of spaces. Yes they are there for people with lots of small children, people who are really pregnant and maybe can't walk very well, but if you can walk an extra few feet maybe you should leave that space for someone who really needs it. Maybe there is a lady who is pregnant with twins, or triplets and really could use a break. Because really, being pregnant or having small children is not a handicap. There are woman all over the world who work manual labor right up until their kids are born, and return to work shortly after often carrying their kids on their backs while they do. Do you think they get special parking spaces?

Why am I so upset about people treating pregnancy as a handicap? Well I may still be a little annoyed from an encounter I had with another pregnant lady a few weeks ago. We were at a friends house cooking them dinner because they just had a new baby. We brought all the food and intended to cook, clean and leave so they could enjoy a meal without any of the worry. Just as we were sitting down to eat some other friends arrived for a visit. Of course we had more than enough food, and honestly I did not mind them having dinner with us. What did annoy me was that after scoring a free meal the wife could not even be bothered to help clean up. She did however inform me that "she would have helped but she is pregnant". I guess being pregnant means you can't do dishes? How on earth do you function? Then as we were both standing outside the house she actually had the nerve to say "maybe we will see you guys again, and if we time it right we can get another free meal." Are you freaking kidding me did getting pregnant also destroy the part of your brain which deals with basic manners?

So maybe I am a little sensitive about people playing the pregnancy/baby card. Yes being pregnant does make you more tired, you may feel sick, you may not want to unload a truck or re-sod my front lawn but you can wash a bloody plate. Trust me I get that carting around small babies/kids is challenging, it takes way longer than you think, it makes everything more complicated but it can be done. You don't need to occupy a parking space designed for people with legitimate reduced mobility.

Wow, I feel much better now that I have gotten that off my chest.

I will take it where I can get it.

2010-11-22T19:57:00.004-05:00

If you are a parent one thing you know very well is that kids take up a lot of your time. While you love your little darlings, cherish their cute giggles and heart warming smiles they do have a way of wearing you out. As much as I hate to admit it sometimes relationships do take a hit. Before little Missy came along we used to enjoy regular romantic dinners with nice bottles of wine. We used to go out for long dinners, walks, coffee dates and enjoyed long breakfasts while reading the Saturday paper.

Now we still take walks, most to the park. We still go for coffee, mostly out of survival and occasionally one of us gets to read part of the paper. We do still have nice dinners when we can but instead of looking across the table into each others eyes and talking about our day one of us is often juggling Missy while reading her a book and trying to shovel in the food. We still talk about our day but somehow the topic always comes around to poop and whether or not Missy had a good day at daycare. As much as we try, sometimes romance takes a back seat to daily life.

After all it is hard to conjure up romantic feelings when you are scrubbing poop out of your curtains, changing bed sheets at 2 am and basically just trying to get through the day with all your faculties intact.

So I take romance where I can get it. Lately I have come to appreciate the little moments, stolen minutes in the daily madness. On Friday dear hubby had to go and get the stitched out of his chin, and I had to get blood tests done at the same hospital. So we made a date out of it. For 2 hours we were kid free, work free, chore free and had nothing to do but sit and chat. We even got to spend an hour in the cafeteria enjoying a warm breakfast and drinking a whole cup of hot coffee. I had the egg muffin and Dylan had the BLT bagel, not really gourmet by any stretch of the imagination, but it was the first time we enjoyed a full meal together in over a month so we made the most of it. The best part was 2 stitches had to be left in until today so we got to go back again this morning for another mini hospital date.

Life with kids is busy, fun and exhausting. It does change your relationships, with your spouse, your friends and your family. But it does not mean the romance is dead you may just have to look for it in creative places.

Entropy and other nonsense

2010-11-20T21:19:00.000-05:00

Hello boys and girls. Thank you for baring with me and not totally giving up on me despite my complete lack of blogging. We have recently suffered a few more bonus rounds of daycare disease wheel, which included a few days of 41 degree fever. Hopefully we are good for a few more weeks. We have also had 2 PhD defenses in the lab and I have been busy planning celebrations and making jello shooters.

I have learned a few things recently.

I have the ability to make any healthy recipe unhealthy. I find a great recipe in my healthy cooking magazine and then I just spice it up with a little butter, bacon and cream. Everything is better with bacon, that should be a universal law.

Just because you can do something does not mean you have to do it. For example, just because you are at an all you can eat Brazilian BBQ restaurant, it does not mean that you should eat all you can. At some point a rational controlled individual would think I don't need to eat 3 sausages, 2 chicken parts, 2 bacon wrapped turkey hunks and a few piles of delicious BBQ beef. I am not that rational controlled person, and as a result I got to suffer my first ever meat hangover. I guess this is what happens when you don't get out very often.

Cleaning is overrated. It takes a lot of time, it is not really very fun and by the time I get one room cleaned the toddler tornado has already struck. If the laws of physics are correct, and I sort believe they are, then everything leads to increased entropy (disorder). So who am I to fight the laws of physics, time to embrace entropy.

I wish I could take back all those times I refused to take a nap as a kid, refused to go to bed early and just decided to stay up for fun. I wish I could add all that time up and use it to hibernate for a few days.

Winter is coming no matter how much I dislike it. It comes every year and yet each time I end up freezing and cursing as I try and extend the life of my fall clothes, instead of just putting on the ugly warm coat and boots. Really winter puts a damper on my already limited fashion. Not to mention what it dry air does to my hair. However I do love warm fires, cuddles and the occasional ski trip. I like the concept of winter, in stories and books but I think I could do without winter and be happy. I know its not very Canadian of me but its true.

Happy weekend everyone!

And I'm a Material Girl

2010-11-11T22:16:00.002-05:00

It has been a busy busy few months and sadly there is no sign of things slowing down anytime soon. It is one big crazy fest around here and if you show up unannounced you may just get a front row seat and some popcorn. Despite my crazy schedule, complete lack of control and total loss of any and all organization in my life, I have to say things are pretty good around here. All the dishes, laundry, chores, remind me that I have a family and that is worth all the extra work.

I don't get a lot of time for me, but recently due to yet another work trip I had to find the time and do a little shopping. Clothes shopping. What a gong show that can be. I used to love shopping, the thrill of the hunt, finding the perfect piece, finding a sweet sale. It all used to make me just a little giddy. Now shopping is frustrating, depressing and difficult. First off there has been some body rearrangement post baby and despite finally loosing the baby weight, well things just don't fit like they used to. I used to know what cut of jeans would work, I used to know what shirts would be perfect, now its like I have to get to know my body all over again. Sadly I have to do that standing in front of a full length mirror in bad fluorescent lighting, which is enough to send any girl straight to Ben and Jerry's for some ice cream therapy. Eventually with the help of a great friend I found some sassy new outfits, some super sexy new boots and a great don't mess with me power dress. It is amazing how a few new pieces can spice a girl up. I realize this makes me sound a little materialistic and shallow, but sometimes we have to embrace the truth and the truth is having clothes that fit properly make most of us feel a whole lot prettier/sexier.

I did realize a few things during my shopping adventures.

1. There is a reason that woman love to buy shoes. Your waist size my change, but your shoe size pretty much stays the same. This premise also applies to accessories, scarves, necklaces and hats. Now I get why accessories are so fun! Frustration free fun and festivity!

2. H&M sells a lot of really ugly clothes. I don't know if this means I am getting "old", but I would not put on 90% of the stuff in that store. I did try on a pile of things, some of them just so I could have a good laugh, but the purchase pile was pretty small by comparison. Then again I work in a lab so what do I know about fashion.

3. Jeggings are a bad, bad idea. Leggings are great for working out, and if you are 16 with 18 inch thighs but for the other 98% of people wearing them, please just go home and burn them.

4. I am a little ashamed to admit this but Jessica Simpson jeans are great for the gal whose got a little junk in the trunk. I did not want to try them on, but the perky sales girl was pretty insistent and much to my shock/horror/dismay they did look pretty good and now I own a pair of Jessica Simpson jeans. Don't worry I won't be rushing out to buy a pair of daisy dukes, and blond hair dye.

5. Shopping is much much easier when you don't have a crazy active toddler ripping open the curtain and running out of the change room with your shirt. Nothing is funnier to a store full of strangers than a half naked lady running around a store playing peek-a-boo.

No control

2010-10-31T21:51:00.007-04:00

Beware of small packages. They can be dangerous. These teeny tiny chocolate bars (which are about 1/2 the size they used to be), are deceptively dangerous. You look at them, they seem so harmless, you pop it in your mouth and in one bite its gone. Then you eat about 10 and realize that you just ate a whole days worth of calories and you have serious heartburn. I would like to think I had more self control but apparently not. And since the neighborhood kids were way to honest to take all the candy I left outside in the bowl, I must give it away tomorrow. I can not be trusted and apparently neither can Missy...

She did not really eat any but she was some mad when I took it away.

But we did have fun trick-or-treating. Missy wanted to go into everyone's house she did not really care about the candy she was just happy to be outside. Our friends who spent most of their life in California did not realize that in Canada you need to make sure your kids Halloween costume fits over a snow suit.

Just Checking In

2010-10-26T21:25:00.014-04:00

It has been a while since I had the time/energy/mojo for blogging, apparently the life of a working mom is a hectic one. There were plenty of things I wanted to blog about, but just got distracted. What I really need is someone to follow me around with a tape recorder, record my thoughts and then type them up, wait that would not work out well for anyone, scratch that idea.

So what has kept me so busy, well I will tell you (since I know you are dying to know).

I attended 2 conferences and presented posters at both. The first conference was a Neurophysics meeting where I learned way way more than I ever wanted to know about opto-genetics. The second was a GPCR meeting where I learned way more about polymorphs than I need to know. For those of you who are trying to imagine what these sorts of meetings are like well imagine a healthy mix of the of socially awkward, overly obsessed, terribly dressed, freaking brilliant people (not including myself) all trying to fake interest in other peoples work. Throw in a lot of bad coffee, and some uncomfortable chairs and that pretty much sums up a conference. Of course there is also the after conference activities, hanging out in cool pubs and meeting some fun new people that make the whole experience all in all, pretty good. I also enjoyed the poster on laser ablation of genital warts. Oddly enough the author did not stand by their poster once the whole conference. Not sure why they would be embarrassed, not everyone got to have photos like that on their poster. Who would pick that as a research project?

Little Missy and I attended a local fall fair where she was excited to see the ponies, ducks and sheep. Her and her little cohorts also enjoyed playing the in pumpkin patch. This sort of activity never would have got me excited before I became a parent, but suddenly a few animals, some gourds, face painting and I get pretty excited. Mostly I was excited to have a break from the normal trip to the park.

Speaking of Missy this last month she erupted 4 new teeth making it a grand total of 16. These last four seemed to be the worst and it was a solid week of whining, crying and sleepless nights (for all of us).

My mom showed up for a week to give us some time to go out and have a real date night. That was fabulous and much needed! Gotta love Grandma! Before having kids I would never consider living right next to my parents, but now I would live in the same house if it meant constant help, a really big house of course.

This past weekend we packed up the family and headed to Schomberg and Toronto for a few days. We spent the first 3 nights at the farm and then headed into Toronto for a surprise party for one of our friends. It was a great trip. She loved the animals on the farm, and would have spent all day with the horses if we let her. For some reason little Missy slept better at other people's houses but did not enjoy the 6 hour car ride in each direction.

Checking out the chickens.

Betty's close up

Betty and her colt Beau

How could you not love a place like this?

Add in some laundry, dishes, grocery shopping, vacuuming, and the occasional meal and that about sums up the last month. Now I am back, things are approaching calmness and I may just find some funny once again. Oh yes and one of my papers was accepted, with very minimal revisions. Whooo hoo! What a freaking month...

Beware the Illusion

2010-09-20T21:09:00.004-04:00

Last week one of my mommy friends asked me the question, "how do you do it, how do you balance work and home and family?". I laughed, but she was serious. Some how she was under the illusion that I have it all together. I stress the word illusion, because this house of cards is just waiting for a strong wind. I guess she only comes over after I have cleaned the bathroom and put away the clothes that little Missy drags all over. She has never seen me in my pajamas at noon on a Saturday and I don't let her open my pantry door. Even though my world seems chaotic, especially for me, it does seem to have sorted its self out. And I guess that is the secret, there isn't one. You just do what you have to in order to make it work. When you have to go back to work you figure out how to fit in all the other stuff. I am sure that's the way it is when you add another kid, of course there is more work but you just adapt. That is life and sometimes it is messy, sometimes its crazy, and sometimes you end up stuck in a change room trapped in a dress that is way to small with a screaming infant and wondering is this really your life?

This weekend I end up trapped in a black spandex body shaping slip which I assume is what if feels like to be eaten by a boa constrictor. It got hot in the tiny room, I started to panic and if it wasn't $80 I would of just asked them to cut it off me. In my attempt to wrap the dressing room curtain around the stroller so Missy could see me, I ended up leaving 2 gaping holes so that anyone in the store got to see what is left of my dignity. So much for fancy French dress stores. So instead of shopping for dress clothes in my normal places I tried to squeeze it in while I was doing my weekly shopping at Walmart and Loblaws. In addition to nothing being cut properly, or fitting they have these great fun house mirrors which expand your hips, shrink you a few inches and give you a lovely yellow glow. I felt like a real mom as I coaxed my toddler into the dressing room and tried to decide which was the least ugly shirt and dress. Then I got to wrestle her back into the cart and go find some milk and a new crock pot. It was not glamorous but now I have a dress shirt and a dress which sort of fit, and it is better than showing up for my presentation wearing my pajamas. Just doing my part to keep the illusion of a composed working mom alive.

For Sale or Wanted?

2010-09-18T21:14:00.002-04:00

Do you use Craigslist? I love it! I buy a ton of baby stuff and sell a lot of the stuff we don't want. It's like an online garage sale you can check out anytime of the day. Today there were some particularly funny posts I came across....I could not make these up.

Wanted: live bedbugs - $2 (Ndg)

I'm a psychology student investigating the recent epidemic of bedbugs and reactions to these nasty critters. I need live bedbugs contained in sealed containers, and will pay around 2$ for each bedbug.

All I have to say is gross, and eww!

French exchange for a massage/ m4m

Im looking for someone to practice my french in exchange for a massage, that can be one time per week or more.

Kinda makes me wish I knew how to speak French.

Need receipts for home renovations/repairs/furniture

I'd like to buy home renovation receipts from you if possible. We did a lot of renovation but need receipts. Anything you bought during 2010 such as door, door knob, paint, metal posts, cement, furniture, roof repair, wires, floors,... anything to do with repairs or renovation.
Let me know how much you have & we will figure out an amount to buy them from you. thank you!

I am sort of curious how much someone would pay for receipts?

Free toilet (Napierville)

Sitting by the street. Come get it before trash pickup on Wednesday morning.

Hopefully nobody uses it before you get there.

Non-functional Sony TV 32" (Vaudreuil)

It won't turn on, but can be repaired. Pretty heavy, about 75 kg.

Translation: Really heavy garbage we don't want to take to the dump.

Maybeline 4 color eyeshadow for face foundation/concealer (Metro Joliette )

HI Girls,
I know we sometimes buy more cosmetics than what we can use, by any chance you have a facial foundation or concealer, not too light, I am Asian. light tan color.

I have this 4 color Maybeline Brand eyeshadows, green, beige, brown, & high light. You should make some nice mix with these colors!
I used it only once since I have loads of others! If you don't mind, try them, they are pretty cool! I got it like 8.49+taxes.

Yah sometimes you eat the $8.50 and go buy some new foundation.

Trade Massage Therapy for.... (Plateau)

Female Swedish Massage Therapist with 9 years experience will trade professional massage therapy for a giant plant, garage band jam pack loops software, nice floor lamps, restaurant gift certificates, a desk, stylish comfortable chair, toaster oven, spa certificates, dvd player, good top loam delivered, mp3 player..... suggestions?

Your dignity perhaps...

McDonald's Coupons

I have the McDonald's coupon flyer that was distributed last week.

I've used the "free coffee" and $1.99 coffee/egg mxmuffin coupons, but I don't need any of the 2-for-1 meals, or the $2.99 trio breakfast.

Would anyone (with a family, perhaps?) trade me free coffee or $1.99 breakfast coupons for the 2-for-1 meals? (say, 2 of mine for each 1 of yours). Or is there a small item you'd like in exchange ?

We could make exchange at centrally-located McDonald's. Thanks for reading

No comment

Cigs - Canadian Classics Silver 24 King Sized : FOR???

Basically a friend came from out of country this weekend and forgot a pack with only one cigarette smoked.

I don't smoke, nor do any of my circle. So if you'd like to save a bit or have something cool to trade send me an email.

I am up for Booze, N64: game or controller and a game cube memory card, game or controller. (obviously pick one of the previous things to trade :P)

Or you go to your local high school and sell them for $1/each. Obviously this person has never smoked.

Chickens to barter (MTL)

I have 99 layer hens (chickens) to barter.

message me for more info.

Thanks

What are 99 chickens worth these days?

Free Vacuum cleaner for ...

... clean my kitchen.
... clean my bathroom.
... Wash my dishes.
... Repair some of my clothes (sewing).

Not sure I would want to clean a strangers bathroom, unless it was a Dyson!

Just a few of the fantastic postings from my local craigslist.

Mental tornado

2010-09-14T20:25:00.003-04:00

I'm back. Well actually I never went anywhere I have just been trapped in a state of perpetual motion. I still have a ton of little things to do but I decided I needed some me time. Not the annoying McDonald's style me time, but the quietly sitting on the couch drinking a cup of tea and typing me time. Sadly my mind is not as relaxed and calm as my body, instead I have a ton of random "stuff" flying around in there.

I am having issues sleeping. I am tired, I am exhausted but when I lay down I can't fall asleep. I lay there, I think about "stuff" and instead of sleeping I worry about how I am going to get all my "stuff" done and then I worry about the fact that I am not sleeping so I will be extra tired, and be even less likely to finish what I need to because I would rather be sleeping, but sadly I can't sleep. Hot milk is gross, alcohol is tasty but downing a few martinis every night makes you look like a lush, and sleeping pills are just so cliche.

So instead of sleeping I watch some t.v. Last night there was nothing on so we watched dirty jobs. Every once in a while I enjoy Mike's sense of humor. This episode was amazing. He was at a camel ranch in California washing, massaging, riding and milking camels. I was tired but I had to watch someone milk a camel. Apparently it is not trivial to milk a camel, and these nut jobs who owned the farm were going on about all the benefits of camel milk. My favorite was when the lady said that if you have issues with cows milk, you won't with camel milk because it is a "smaller molecule". Now I try not to get to high and mighty about chemistry/biochemistry unless it is absolutely necessary, but really, this woman was a total moron. Lactose intolerance has nothing to do with the size of the lactose, and really who wants to drink camel milk. Did you know that you can also eat camel poop, apparently its good for you, and you can wash your hair with their urine, oh they are just an endless source of new age fussy hippy fun. My favorite part of the whole show was of course watching the camels mate. And I can admit that, I was intrigued watching those two camels get their grove on, and I know that I am not the only person who watched the whole episode just for that. Sadly, camel kama sutra did not make me any more sleepy instead it just gave me strange dreams.

Do you know what no sugar, no fat, no preservative added whole wheat bread tastes like? Well it tastes like eating a cardboard box. Who knew fat, sugar and preservatives were so tasty?. Well I did and this just confirms it. Actually the bread is for little Missy but today I was out of bagels and I had to try her nasty bread. I went to the cupboard to try and salvage my breakfast with some peanut butter and was totally disappointed to find someone has replaced my yummy peanut butter with low fat peanut butter. Guess what low fat peanut butter tastes like? Crap, sugary gritty crap. Luckily I was too tired to really care so I just ate my cement covered cardboard.

High ho, high ho, off to work I go where I got to spend the day growing up bacteria for maxi preps. Its super fun and smells great. It also gives you a lot of time to think about "stuff", and I spent most of that time thinking about why I hate other parents. There are many reasons I hate other parents, but the main reason is their neurotic behavior seems to amplify my already neurotic tendencies. This last week was a great example of this. Two weeks ago one of my mommy friends told me she bought her daughter a snow suit, at first I figured she was just overly excited. Then at the park the next weekend I was listening to a gaggle of moms discussing how they had all bought their kids snow suits and that they were almost sold out. How the f&^K do you sell out of snow suits in August? And why are people all buying snow suits in August? Oh I know why, some crazy super organized mom decided that August was the month to buy snow suits, then she tells her friends they HAVE to get their kids snow suits, and then they feel like bad parents if they don't do it, so they do it, and then it is 23 degrees outside and I am stuffing my screaming 1 year old into a bloody freaking huge, hot snow suit because I am in a panic that there are only 4 left in her size at the whole store. And of course there are only really 2 good brands, so you have to get one of those, apparently the good old Zellers special snow suit means you don't love your kid. It is a nasty cycle. But the one upside to the whole fiasco is that little Missy now has a purple and pink pussy cat snow suit that costs way too much money, but at least it is the "right brand", so now I can go to the park and keep propagating the insanity. We still do not have boots, but I think I will save that special fun for another weekend.

So that is all I got right now, maybe I will have a drink and see what other animals are mating on tv tonight.

JAW Award #8

2010-09-10T09:30:00.000-04:00

As I mentioned yesterday this week did not start off great. One of the many things which contributed to my mood was the annoying, painful and angry canker sore in my mouth. My canker was making me cranky. I have not had one in over 10 years and I forgot how truly awful they were. I was having trouble eating, and drinking which are basically my two favorite activities. Even sleeping was an issue because every time I rolled on my one side I would wake up in pain. Consequently I was a bit of a walking zombie. In the morning I would painfully sip my coffee determined to get my required caffeine fix so that I would vaguely resemble a functional human being. In addition to my canker I had a ranging sore throat and hot beverages are really the only thing that made my throat feel better.

Now in case you just tuned in I do love my coffee, and more than the caffeine I love the taste. During my pregnancy I drank a lot of decaf because I just love the taste. Well after having 3 cups of normal coffee, and starting to oscillate at my own frequency my throat still ached and I decided I would go and get a cup of decaf to have with my lunch. So I wandered down the hill to the Engineering building cafeteria, a place I try to avoid for many reasons. The main one being the people that work there appear to have spent way to much time cleaning the oven. Sadly, the summer break and fresh air did not seem to help them regrow any fresh brain cells.

There was no decaf coffee set out. However, it was the first week of being open again and I did notice that they had 5 containers ready and waiting so I figured I would take the chance and ask. This is exactly how that interaction went down.

Me: "Excuse me is one of those decaf?"

Lady: "No we don't have any decaf right now, but we have organic coffee"

Me: "Is it organic decaf?"

Lady: "No its organic, but that's the same thing."

Me: "Uh, no organic is not the same as decaf, decaf coffee has little to no caffeine, organic means it was grown without pesticides"

Lady: "Trust me the organic is the same as the decaf"

Me: "Trust me it is not. Never mind the coffee, do you have any herbal tea bags"

Lady: "No but we have organic tea"

Me: "Aahh! I give up"

I went back to my office frustrated and dug around my desk until I found a mint tea bag. I think I will avoid the Engineering cafe for good now. Lesson learned.

Whole Heartedly Happy

2010-09-09T09:01:00.002-04:00

Last week was not great, and this week started out much the same. However, ever since yesterday afternoon I have been very very happy. After spending many hours at the Montreal Children's Hospital seeing 3 different doctors and 1 ultrasound technician I was told that little Missy was no longer considered a child with a heart condition. That was the best news any parent could ever wish for. We went to the park to celebrate.

During the commotion that surrounded baby A's arrival I did not fully comprehend some of the health issues that my baby had. When they took her to the NICU for her brain bleed that was pretty much all I could focus on. How was her brain scan, how was the swelling, did she have normal pupil reactions? I do vaguely remember Dylan muttering something about a prominent heart murmur and needing a cardiac echo, but for some reason I did not process that information. At 2 days old she had her first cardiac echo and it was not until we met with her cardiologist 2 weeks later that I started to process why they did that test. They had detected a congenital heart defect called an atrial septal defect (ASD), which is commonly referred to as a hole in the heart. When the doctor said those words a huge knot formed in my stomach. When I was a kid my grandma told me about a family friend who's child had this condition and died as a teenager from heart failure. I tried to concentrate on what the doctor was saying but it mostly sounded like "whan, whan whan" at the time.

What I did hear was that it was a relatively common condition among newborns, and that often the hole will close on its own over time. Typically the defect is 2mm, but baby A's was slightly larger than 4mm, which meant that her's may not close on its own and it may require heart surgery.

The doctor told us we were going to wait and see what happened after 1 year. We had to watch her closely for symptoms which included poor appetite, sweating while eating, shortness of breath and extreme fatigue. So in addition to potential brain damage we also had to worry about a heart condition. I was a huge wreck. It took me a long time to stop panicking when she did not want to eat or slept longer than normal. Eventually I realized she did not have any of the symptoms and I started to relax, sort of. I did not realize until yesterday how it had always been there in the back of my mind, but when the doctor told me that the defect had closed I instantly felt 10 pounds lighter.

Spending time in the cardiac wing of a Children's Hospital is probably the saddest thing a person can do. I saw a lot of exhausted, worried and defeated looks on parents faces. I cried a few tears of relief and then I shed a few tears for the parents who would not get such good news. It made me realize how truly miraculous it is to have a healthy baby.

Oyster Fest!

2010-09-08T08:59:00.000-04:00

This past Sunday the whole family headed out to check out Oyster Fest,and we all had a great time! I hate oysters, but hubby loves them. And there was lots of other delicious food there to enjoy. It was actually a fundraiser for some environmental charity. Normally I would avoid such events because my personality often clashes with the earth loving granola types who have fundraisers for oysters. However, I was convinced this would be a great idea when I heard that there was actually going to be a bunch of the city's fabulous resturants participating. Yup I am a food whore. I can admit it. For delicous BBQ I can fake interest in some slimy sea creatures for a few hours.

It was held in some parking lot in Old Town, there were food tents, a big eating tent, some port-a-potties,a DJ, a bunch of BBQ's, and a beverage tent. Nothing fancy, nothing posh, just delicious food. My kind of event. We were actually very excited because Dylan and I love food, and now with little Missy in our lives we don't often get to get out and try new places. This was held in the middle of the day and we were able to bring the little one along. What more could food addicts with a 1 year old want, actually a designated driver would have been nice.

Dylan ate enough oysters for both of us, my favorite was the BBQ Korean beef from Kiazen. There was also lobster rolls from L'Orignal, and some delicious beer from Bierbrier. One of the booths had the most sticky tender ribs, I may have went back 3 times and spent 20 minutes licking BBQ sauce off of my fingers. It was savage and wonderful. I was even convinced to share some of my ribs with little Missy who also has the BBQ loving gene. I think she may have eaten a whole rib. We were so proud.

Here is a gratuitous food shot of beer, ribs and a pile of shaved prosciutto, my mouth is watering just looking at it.

The trickiest part was trying to push a stroller while balancing two plates of ribs, a plate of prosciutto and a shot glass of Jagermeister in my mouth. Next time I am bringing a large tray/trough.

There were lots of families there and Missy spent a lot of the time running round chasing other babies. This is actually one of my favorite things about Montreal, people with kids leave the house and do normal adult activities. However, we knew it was time to leave when all the hipsters started to arrive. I love good food, but there is only so much ass baggery I can handle. I did enjoy one particularly fabulous example. As I was lined up at the taco truck for lets say the second time the guy behind me was complaining to his wife/girlfriend, "if I had known we were going to be in such rugged conditions I would not have worn my new shoes." I looked down at the gravel under my not new mommy shoes and imagined that he must be talking about his brand new Italian hand made leather shoes. However, when I turned around I saw he was wearing teal green runners. Maybe I missed something but first they were fugly teal green runners, and secondly, if you can't wear shoes outside where exactly do you where runners? I though about spilling my beer or my taco on his shoes, then decided that both were way to delicious to waste on such ugly shoes.

Definitely a great day, definitely would recommend this event to others.

Toddler Cuisine

2010-09-07T20:21:00.001-04:00

So eventually we finally got little Missy to eat again. I think her molars were really bugging her, either that or I managed to win this one because finally after 1 week she started to eat normally again. Following the very appreciated comments, emails and personal discussions I have tried to mix things up a little and come up with some new food ideas. It is tricky because we come home from work around 5 and baby A needs to eat dinner around 5:30 - 6:00 so that she can have her bath and be in bed by 7:00. That does not leave a lot of time for food preparation. I like to make baby A's food myself rather than rely on store bought food, but lets face it I am a busy busy lady. For us it works best to have things that can be frozen and re-heated easily, but lets face it that does not leave a lot of options.

The current favorites around our house are beef Shepard's pie, lamb/chicken meatballs with tomato sauce, broccoli & cauliflower mac&cheese, and chicken, red lentils and apples. The last two I still blend a little, for now. The meatballs I cut up into quarters so little A can eat them with her fingers.

I thought I would share some of these recipes for all those who may have the same issues.

Beef Shepard's Pie

The real novelty of this was figuring out how to package and freeze these for easy re-heating later. Then my brilliant husband suggested I use the silicon muffin cups which worked perfectly for this and many other things like toddler sized single serving lasagna.

1/2 lb of ground beef
1 small onion
1/8 cup low sodium beef broth
1/8 - 1/4 cup water
1/2 can of tomato paste
1/2 cup mixed frozen veggies cut small (carrots, peas, corn etc)
6 potatoes (mashed)
1/4 cup shredded cheese

1. Brown the ground beef and drain off all remaining fat/water. Really separate the beef into small bite sized chunks to avoid choking.
2. Add onions and brown onions briefly. Then add beef broth, water and tomatoe paste. Let simmer for about 30 minutes until really tender.
3. Add in veggies and cook for an additional 10 minutes.
4. Mash potatoes with milk and butter.
5. Scoop some of the meat mixture into the bottom of the muffin cups and spoon potato mixture to cover.
6. Sprinkle with cheese.

I freeze them individually in the muffin tins covered in plastic wrap. When I want to serve one for supper I take it out in the morning and put it in the fridge to let it thaw completely. Then I reheat it in a 350 degree oven for 20 - 30 minutes.

Broccoilli, Cauliflower Mac & Cheese

1/2 cup broccolli
1/2 cup cauliflower
1/4 cup old fashion cottage cheese or ricotta cheese
1/2 cups of shredded cheese
1 cup pasta (I use Kamut pasta)
1 1/2 - 2 cups water

1. Bring water to a boil, throw in pasta and cook for a few minutes. If using whole wheat or kamut pasta cook it half way. If using regular pasta throw in broccoli and cauliflower with the pasta.
2. Mix in cottage cheese, and shredded cheese. Blend thoroughly. If necessary add some milk to get desired consistency.

This freezes really well. Little missy typically eats 2 - 3 oz per serving.

Chicken, Apples and Red Lentil Puree

2 chicken breasts or 1 lb of ground chicken
1/2 small onion
1 cup of red lentils
1 carrot
2 apples
1 1/2 - 2 cups of water
2 tbsp low sodium chicken broth

1. Cut chicken into small pieces. Coat frying pan with oil and brown chicken pieces. Throw in onions and cook until they are transparent. Put chicken and onions in medium sized pot. Use the chicken broth to scrap off remaining browned chicken from pan and pour into pot. Add water.
2. Add carrots and boil for 20 - 30 minutes until carrots are tender.
3. Add red lentils and apples and boil for an additional 20 minutes until lentils are soft.
4. Puree to desired consitancy.

This also freezes very well and keeps for up to 3 months in the freezer.

Lamb and Chicken Meatballs with Tomato Sauce

For Meatballs:
1/2 lb ground lamb
1/2 lb ground chicken
1/2 small onion diced very fine
1/8 tsp garlic powder
1 tsp Italian herbs
1 egg yolk
1/2 cup of bread crumbs

For Sauce:
1 large can of whole tomatoes (1/2 juices drained)
1/2 can tomato paste
1/2 onion diced
1 carrot diced
1 stick of celery diced
1/2 cup diced zucchini
1 tsp Italian seasoning
2 tbsp olive oil

1. Mix together all ingredients for meatballs.
2. Roll into small balls (about the size of a quarter or a loonie)
3. Place on a baking sheet covered with parchment paper
4. Bake at 350F for 20 - 40 minutes until cooked through
5. Cool and freeze individually before putting in a bag or container for storage.

6. Heat olive oil in a medium sized pot
7. Add vegetables and saute for a few minutes. I often put the lid on to speed softening of the vegetables. Add in tomatoes, tomato paste and seasoning. Simmer of about 30 minutes.
8. Cool and puree to desired consistency.

I freeze the sauce separately in small cubes so that I can use it for plain pasta. I reheat the meatballs in a small pot with some sauce. They are already cooked through so you just need to warm them to serve. I cut little A's into quarters.

Other marginally successful things include:

1. Cheese quesidilla
2. Grilled cheese
3. cherry tomatoes

Rejected

2010-09-03T21:52:00.003-04:00

That is the theme for my week, Rejected.

First our submission to Cell, rejected. Not that I was to surprised mind you but still it stung a little. At least they were nice enough to write two different PFO letters to us. That meant that most of my creative juices this week went into re-tooling my article and preparing to re-submit to another journal. Hopefully with a little more success. Its a game am learning some new tricks, maybe it will make me wiser, but mostly I think it will just make me a little more cynical (if that is possible).

Second, pcard purchases, rejected! Stupid McGill forcing us to use their new on-line purchasing program which by the way is not more convenient than simpling using our group purchase card for supplies. I used to order things on line direct from the company, pay with our Mastercard and it would arrive either the next day or within 48 hours. I guess this sort of efficiency frightened the higher-ups and they alerted the make-workers, who then had a meeting with the paper-pushers and the red-tape brigade, and collectively they decided that they could create a new more difficult, frustrating system to help employ more union people at McGill. Viola, McGill Marketplace.

Thirdly, my body has decided to reject itself. I am in pain, a little sad, super grouchy and definitely not loving being me right now.

So I spent most of today in my office having a small pity party. There was cake and coffee, but I did not have the energy to put up decorations. It felt good, it felt justified under the circumstances but mostly it felt annoying. So I decided not to be sad, grouchy or frustrated anymore this week. That part of the week is over. Moving on. This weekend I am getting my hair cut, my favorite luxury ever, having friends over for dinner, heading out with hubby and offspring # 1 to a food festival in the Old Port, and then rounding the long weekend off with a fun park date with my ladies and their lovely junior ladies. When I finally got over myself I realized it is my choice to be happy, my choice to let them/it win or my choice to try again. I think I will keep trying.

Sticking with the theme of keep trying, I want to have a special public congratulations to the new and totally amazing Dr. Princess. You are way more stubborn, way more tough and way more feisty than anyone else I know. I only wish I was there to see it in person.

Happy Long Weekend!

Its a doggie world.

2010-08-30T10:31:00.006-04:00

This weekend I had a rather unpleasant confrontation while at the park. On Saturday, baby A and I joined our friends Zrinka and Vesslin with their daughter T for an afternoon at the local park. This park is huge. It has 2 parks, one for older kids and one for babies, a water park, a baseball diamond, an off leash area and a huge swath of grass to enjoy. On a typical summer Saturday afternoon there is probably about 50 - 100 kids there. It can be rather chaotic. We were sitting on our blankets in the shade under some trees when a rather large dog (looked like a mutt, but was at least as tall as my mid thigh) went running by. I immediately asked the owner to put the dog on a leash. She had another dog, a pit bull on a leash with a spike collar. Immediatly she got very defensive and informed me that her dog was "gentle" and obviously she "made a judgment call to not put her on a leash because she does not need one". Okay first off, this is not your judgment call to make. The bylaws state very clearly that your dog must be on a leash. It does not say nice dogs do not need leashes. And second of all there is a freaking off leash area if you want to let your dog run around go in there, but do not let your dog run around where all the kids are playing. That is 100% irresponsible. I don't take my baby to play in the off leash area, that would be stupid. I don't care how nice you dog is, when kids are around playing you have to be responsible. Imagine a little kid had a ball in their hands and the dog got excited and wanted the ball. Sorry, but nice or not you have to consider other people. Her response was "you could cut off this dogs leg with a butter knife and they would not even bite you", she was brilliant. In the end I basically had to threaten to call the cops and report her dog if she refused to put it on a leash. After calling me some nice names she put the dog on a leash and then proceeded to ride around us in circles on her bike with her pit bull and the other dog. I guess she was trying to threaten me or make some sort of point, either way it wrecked our lovely afternoon picnic.

This is one thing that really really gets me going. I understand people own dogs, I like dogs. We let missy play with dogs in a controlled environment. We want her to respect dogs and know how to be around them, but it should be our choice what dogs she is exposed to. I know that most dog owners see their little puppies as humans, but they are not humans, they are dogs. And for that reason sometimes they do need to be on leashes. I do like the idea of off leash areas, and I do think that there should be more of them around. However, in parks which are shared with everyone basic rules apply.

Oviedo

2010-08-28T15:17:00.014-04:00

There is a very magical town in Spain called Oviedo. I am not sure what makes it so magical, but they must put something in the water there because I know at least two happily ever after fairy tales that start in that very city, on this very day 5 years ago.

Rewinding a few days, I had spent 1 week in Strasbourg for some research related activities, and then a few days in Chamonix hiking and contemplating life while enjoying the crisp alpine air. It sounds great, but it was a horrible trip. So many things went wrong, I was in Europe all alone, and I kept asking myself what was I doing there. In Strasbourg I was attacked by a masturbater in a tunnel, I was followed back to my hotel twice by a very aggressive man who did not take no for an answer, and then managed to get myself locked inside my hotel room, and I had the only key. This was definitely not the amazing adventure I had pictured for myself when I planned my trip. The worst part was that I had 2 more weeks ahead of me and all I could think was "I want to go home now!" After Chamonix I had to get myself first to Geneva, then fly to Barcelona, change planes and fly to Oviedo. I was attending a conference on "Trends in Nanotechnology", and I was sure that sitting through endless hours of scientific talks would end up being the highlight of my disastrous trek through Europe. After the conference I had an additional 7 nights in Spain, enough time to work my way slowly to Barcelona, upon which point I could finally fly home. More than once I contemplated changing my ticket and giving up.

Then things started to turn around. First I met a fun Brit named Jim when I was in the bookstore in Chamonix. After a long night of no sleep (I was right above a pub), a freezing cold shower (no hot water before 9 am), and 4 hours of hiking into the alps I had decided that I was not going to give up, I was going to make the best of this somehow. Thats when I met Jim. He spoke English and he was funny. He was working in Chamonix as a mountain bike guide. We went to pub for lunch, had some beers and agreed to meet up for dinner that night. It was not romantic, it was just two people hanging out in the shadow of Mt Blanc drinking beer and swapping stories. I did not get much sleep that night either, mostly because we drank beer until 2am and I had to catch a train at 6am to Geneva. This was my day of guardian angels. It was a very long walk down from my hotel to the train station and I had a stupid amount of luggage. At 5am there were no cabs. The milk truck was making its rounds, the guy threw my bags in the back and after a few required stops he dropped me at the station. I got to Geneva and realized I had no idea how to get from the train station to the airport. So I asked this nice looking young girl if she spoke English and she did. She not only gave me directions but walked with me to the bus stop and then gave me some Swiss Franks when we both realized I only had Euros. I got to the airport with about 30 minutes to spare. I hung out in the Barcelona airport eating, drinking coffee and practicing my Spanish. My flight was delayed 3 hours, I was not going to get into Oviedo until 1am. I called the hotel, it was no problem (this was before I realized people in Spain don't sleep at night). On the flight I was sitting beside as school teacher. She only spoke about 20 words of English and I only spoke about 20 words of Spanish. I asked her what was the best way for me to get to my hotel, to my surprise the airport is about 1 hour outside of the city. At this point I was tired, I had been up for almost 24 hours and I was willing to pay anything to get to my bed. She insisted that she would drive me to my hotel, which was 1 hour in the opposite direction of where she lived. I sat there as the plane landed and carefully weighted my options. All of my parents warnings about stranger danger were running through my head, but I also knew my options were few and far between. There were no buses or trains at that hour, and getting a cab would be over 100 euros, money I did not have. I thought of sleeping in the airport until I saw that it was basically 1 room with some scary looking guards. So looking around I realized she was my best option. She was so nice, she explained that she would feel so bad if something happened to me and that she needed to make sure I got to my hotel safe. I must have looked really pathetic. At 2 am I got to my hotel. I tried to pay her, and she refused. Like I said it was my day of guardian angels.

I spent the next day catching up on sleep, and figuring out where I had to be for the next week. It was quiet and peaceful in Oviedo, especially after the crazy preceding weeks. I checked out some museums, ate some tapas, drank some wine and started to relax a little. Another goodnight sleep and I was ready to go. Somehow I managed to introduce myself to this fun little Spaniard Manuela who was also attending the conference. There are not a lot of women at these things so it seemed logical that we should stick together. She was Spanish but was working in Germany at the time. We sat down for our breakfast together. They had these ridiculously small individual jars of jam with impossible lids. Finally I gave up trying to open it, looked around the restaurant and heard two guys speaking English. I marched over, stuck out the jam and said "Hi I am Jody can you open this". Dave and Leo were Canadians from Vancouver, also attending the conference. They seemed normal and friendly, something that you can't take for granted at these sorts of events. They mentioned that there was 3 other Canadians from Vancouver at the conference and we decided that night we would round up all the Anglos and head out for dinner and drinks. So after a very very long long day (the Spanish are not very punctual) of talks, posters, discussions and generally pretending to care about science we managed to organize our crew for dinner. So 6 Canadians, 2 Spaniards and one or two randoms headed off to a Cidra house. We sat down, ordered some Cider and started the process of getting acquainted. Somehow the topic of movies cropped up, and I proudly stated that my favorite movie ever was Supertroopers. The quiet but cute guy across the table threw up his hands and yelled "yes". Dave (his lab mate), looked at me across the table and said loudly "oh god there are two of them". Looking back it is hard to imagine that one simple comment could have precipitated 5 amazing years.

Our connection was not instantaneous, there were a few "road blocks". Dylan was pretty shy when I met him, and at the time he was still dating someone else (don't judge me, I behaved myself). But after that first dinner, and a few rounds of cidra we had a lot more to chat about. The eight of us had a great time checking out all the local disco clubs, bars and restaurants, every once in a while we managed to drag our sorry butts to the conference to pretend to care about the science.

We had a great time drinking at Julio's. Dancing at the Corral. Eating copious amounts of boar and drinking a few gin and tonics. There were a lot of late nights, which translated into only a few hours of sleep here and there. It was crazy fun. The more I got to know Dylan the more interested I became. Who was this guy, and why was I so completely drawn to him. There were a few occasions when we were dancing or walking and I would catch his eyes and eventually I realized that maybe I was not the only one who felt the connection. But the 8 of us were having fun and not wanting to change anything, I kept it to myself. During one of our free afternoons while the others slept or did laundry we decided to tour the city just the two of us. It was the most fun yet awkward afternoon, you could have cut the sexual tension with a feather as we both did our best not to make complete fools of ourselves. I can't even remember a single thing we talked about that day. In 24 hours the conference would be over and we would all be going our separate ways. Dylan and his lab mate Leo had planned a 2 week tour of Spain going in the opposite direction I was headed. Brian and Matt, two of the other Canadians were interested in checking out a couple of the places I was going. Manuela was going to stay with her family in the South and Anjel was heading back to Madrid. I was very excited and happy to have a few new people to travel with, but sad that I had to say goodbye to everyone else, including Dylan.
The last night we toured all our favorite places, we ended up at the Corral for some dancing. For some ridiculous reason Dylan and I ended up in some argument (still don't remember how it started) and I decided to call it a night. As I was leaving he told me he would walk me back to the dorm. The stubborn part of me wanted to say "no, I am fine", but it was 2 am and I did not exactly feel comfortable going back alone. We did not talk at first, we just walked avoiding eye contact. Finally I asked what was wrong, why we were having this fight? It was obvious, I guess I did not need to ask, but I wanted to hear the answer. We spent the next 4 hours sitting outside the dormitory talking. I was so exhausted, but I did not want to go to sleep, I did not want that night to end. But eventually the sun came up and we had to be at the conference in a few hours, I had to pack and it was clear it had to end at some point. The next morning was a total blur. I managed to stuff things in my suitcase, grab a quick nap, shower and make to the conference.

The next day we all had to leave. It was madness as we all rushed to the train station and headed off in different directions. Brian, Matt and I almost missed our train to Gijon so we did not get much of a good-bye. A quick hug, a promise to email and we were off. It was such a flurry of activity I did not really have time to feel to sad about it. We found a place in Gijon, a nice 3 bedroom with a kitchenette it was cheap. We should have known something was wrong with it. After dumping our stuff we threw in some laundry and set out to the beach for some rest. It was beautiful, the water was cold and fresh and I should have been relaxed and happy, instead I was feeling confused, happy and frustrated. I did not say anything to Brian or Matt, I figured they didn't need to know about my love drama. Besides, we were on vacation and it was time to have fun. So I decided I would try not to think about Dylan and just have fun, the work part of my trip was over and now I needed to relax and enjoy Spain. No email, no computers just fun. We went out for dinner, grabbed a bottle of wine a few beers and some snacks and headed back to our pad to relax. That is when we out it was right over top of a disco club. By that point all 3 of us were too pooped to party and instead we cursed the maniacs who stayed up all night dancing, forgetting that was us just 24 hours earlier. It was the worst sleep of my life. Too hot to close the windows to noisy to sleep, so I laid awake processing the last week. It is dangerous to have that much time to think about things. We spent another day and night in Gijon, saw the roman baths, ate some paella and spent some time at the cidra houses. Both Bryan and Matt were great guys, and it made much more fun to have someone else to travel with. Matt headed home from Gijon and Bryan and I headed to Bilbao to check out the Guggenheim museum. In the madness of changing all my travel plans I confused some of the hotel reservations. Bryan and I arrived in Bilbao and took a cab to what I thought was our hotel. They had no record of our reservation. I was sure it was this hotel I had booked at, oopsy. The reception lady was annoyed with me, she pointed to a computer in the lobby and told me to go and retrieve my conformation email. I sat down logged on and saw an email from Dylan. I am sure my heart stopped for a moment. I cautiously opened it. He said that they were changing their plans and if I got this email in time would meet me in Barcelona in 2 days at my hotel. I couldn't believe it. I was so excited I could barely type. Oh and then I realized I had the wrong hotel. I printed off the right hotel conformation and sheepishly went back to the desk to admit that I had the wrong place. After giving me some serious attitude which barely registered (I was way to happy to care) she gave us directions to our proper hotel.

It was hard to focus in Bilbao. I decided not to say anything to Bryan. Not that I worried it would hurt his feelings, but he knew Dylan had a girlfriend and I did not feel like a lecture. So we toured the Guggenheim, ate some weird food, did some shopping and found out that Bilbao is one boring city. Bryan left after the first night to go to Madrid and meet up with Anjel, so I had a whole night alone before heading to Barcelona. I was too excited to sleep. I was to nervous to eat. It felt like time was moving backwards. I got up early, and caught the 5 am bus to Barcelona. That was a real experience. There were 10 people waiting for the bus. I was the first on. I sat in the second row against the window. An older lady sat behind me and then a very annoying creepy man sat beside me. Are you kidding, there are about 50 open seats here, go sit somewhere else. I finally managed to convey to him I wanted to sleep and would stretch out on both seats. He agreed to move across the aisle. He had not showered in a few days and had a very strong stench of B.0. By this time the bus was filling up and single seats were all gone so I had to stay where I was. After about 1 hour of trying to talk to me and me pretending to sleep he took off his shoes and put his smelly feet on my seat. The lady behind me kept spraying her vanilla perfume in the air to combat the stench. I was being suffocated by a nasty concoction of vanilla body odor. I was thankful when the bus pulled into Zaragoza. I thought we were just there for a quick stop. Instead they kicked us all out of the bus and made us take our bags. We sat there on the side of the highway in 40+ heat waiting for the bus to Barcelona. Me, the vanilla perfume lady and B.O creepy sweaty guy. It felt like a nightmare. I just wanted to get to Barcelona, finally the bus came and I managed to get an extra seat distance between me and Mr stink. We pulled into the station at Barcelona, I grabbed my bags and made my way to the taxi stand. He followed me and tried to grab my bags, he tried to bribe my cab driver to take him too. I finally had to pay extra to get the cab driver to threaten to call the Police. Men in Europe are very pushy and I apparently had a target on my back.

Anyways, I found my hotel showered and cleaned up. Dylan and Leo were not due there for 2 or 3 more hours so I went for a walk to find coffee. I stopped and bought a purse from a little store and then went back to my hotel. Standing in the lobby was Dylan. I was so excited I ran over and jumped on him. Lucky I had arrived when I did because the hotel was telling him I was not there. There was no room for them to stay at that hotel so I changed and went down town with the two of them to the Gothic quarter. Leo knew of a Hostel where they could rent a mini apartment. It had 2 bedrooms and 3 beds so even though I had a hotel I ended up crashing there. Common you would too. We had the most amazing 3 days and 2 nights. I know we saw a lot of tourist stuff, Gaudi park, the cathedral, and some amazing flamenco dancing. I have pictures to prove I was at all these places but really it seemed like a dream to me. I couldn't believe I was in Barcelona with this amazing guy having this amazing adventure, my arms were bruised from all the pinching I was doing. Across from our apartment they were excavating an old building, and during a rain storm on the second night the exposed electrical caught fire and started sparking. We stood out on our balcony and joked it was fireworks. Seriously best experience of my life.

Finally Dylan and Leo had to leave to go and meet up with Manuela. Oh I forgot to mention that someone Leo had fallen for the lovely Spanish vixen Manuela and the agreement him and Dylan had come to was that they would come to Barcelona to find me if they could go and find Manuela after. Like I said there must be something in the water in Oviedo. The next day I flew home. I had a long flight to sit and replay the last 3 weeks in my mind. So many stars had to align to make all of that happen, mixing up my hotel reservation, coming back to the hotel early, I realized then that maybe I did believe in fate. I couldn't wipe the smile off my face, but at the same time I had no idea what the next few months would bring. Dylan lived in Vancouver, he still had unfinished business and I did not want to be part of that. I still had my degree to finish and business of my own to deal with. Was it just a great European adventure, something to remember in your old age? In any case I figured I was lucky to have had such a great time, a perfect end to a crazy summer.

Dylan emailed me a few times from Spain, he and Leo were there one more week. He emailed me when he got back to Vancouver but we did not "talk" again until it was appropriate. He decided to come out to Calgary and visit me just after Thanksgiving. I stood at the airport baggage carousal so nervous, what if we had nothing to talk about? Would it be the same or did we leave the magic back in Barcelona? It was the same, it was fun and we made the most of every single minute. We decided that next month I would fly to Vancouver, and so began our monthly trips. 3 long weeks of all night phone calls followed by 1 crazy fun weekend trying to cram a months worth of fun into just 48 hours. Eventually we decided that we needed to move to the same city. Dylan was almost done his Masters and I was almost done my PhD, and we decided to move to Montreal so we could both continue doing our work. Everything just worked out, it was easy.

We moved to Montreal in December 2006. One year later I found am engagement ring at the bottom of my stocking. We were married on August 28, 2008, 3 years exactly to the day we met. Almost one year later on August 17th, we welcomed baby A to our family and now it is 5 years to the day I met the love of my life. I am still amazed how it all happened, I still get butterflies when I think of it. If you know me at all you know that I am not a romantic person at heart, but sometimes even a stone cold girl like me gets swept off her feet.

Thanks for an amazing 5 years of love, laughter and life. I can't wait for more!

No Idea

2010-08-27T08:58:00.004-04:00

I have no idea what to call this post. I reread it a few times hoping for inspiration and nothing comes to me. I guess I am still half asleep this morning. I promised funny today, not sure I am really in a funny mood. Maybe a twisted mood, maybe a prankster mood, maybe a mischievous mood, but not really funny. If only they had drugs for that.

So I did not get around to posting my JAW yesterday but boy are there a lot of jackasses this week. It is Frosh week here on the McGill campus and that right there says it all folks. Little known fact but Frosh is actually a Greek word for idiot, its true no need to look it up. Everywhere you go the quiet peaceful campus I have enjoyed for the last 2 months is crawling with tipsy, loud, strangely dressed newbies. After 13 years of post secondary life, which is exactly how long I spent from K - 12, I think the novelty is worn off for me. Like many other grad students and post doc's I feel like the frosh week grinch. Part of me sort of envies their enthusiasm, and I nostalgically think back to the few years where I participated in such activities. However, there are some real monkeys that take frosh week to the extreme and those my friends are the frosh week jackasses! One prime example was the JA I saw driving up University street in a hummer with his buddies, standing out of the sunroof, throwing condoms at people. I am sure once upon a time I would have laughed, but on this day I was thinking where is a freaking cop when you need one. Does that officially mean I am getting old.

Speaking of getting old I was listening to the radio yesterday driving home and they said that McCaulay Culkin turned 30! How the hell did the Home Alone kid turn 30. That made me feel a little on the old side. Oh and he is pretty freakin' weird now, I guess that happens when you grow up in Hollywood. I have the same feeling when I look at NHL player stats and realize that 90% of the players in the league are younger than I am. Why does it feel like other people keep getting older and yet somehow I feel trapped in my 20's? Anybody else, anybody?

Back to the subject of weird, here is another strange fact about me, I can not physically park a car while wearing a seat belt. In Montreal you become an expert at parking, parallel, backing in, wedging in, all of the trickiest maneuvers, and before I can attempt any of them I must remove my seat belt.

Do you know what else is a tricky maneuver eating an apple with no hands. It is practically impossible. I can hold it in my mouth and suck on the juice but no matter how hard I try I still need to use one hand. Thus apples are not good foods to eat while typing. I have mastered eating mini carrots, biting off a small piece, holding the rest of my carrot with my lips and then flicking my head back to get the rest of the carrot in my mouth. Its a talent.

Speaking of talents I did witness a very talented JAW candidate this morning driving her Porsche Carrera while applying make up and drinking her Starbucks extra hot two pump, soy cup of pretentiousness. Sadly her talents did not include signaling or driving in a straight line. Well we can't all be superstars.

So thats all I got, and it is time for this superstar to get her work day started. Much to my dismay the small little shoemaker elves did not come to my lab last night to wash the dishes, rack pipette tips and calibrate the incubator, so I guess its up to me.

Happy Friday!

A little help here

2010-08-26T09:34:00.000-04:00

It appears to be baby week on my blog. Life happens this way, one week I am focused on the family and then next week it is an all out work attack. If you are looking for funny you may need to come back tomorrow.

Okay mammas I need some advice, help and some of your wisdom. We are having a huge problem getting little Missy to eat anything.

Up until 1.5 weeks ago she had a great appetite, she would eat everything and anything we gave her. She would eat a full jar of fruit, and 2 - 3 oz of homemade baby food, plus cheerios at each meal. Then all of a sudden one day she decided she was not going to eat anything on a spoon anymore. She is hungry, we put her in her chair and she screams, we give her finger foods, cheerios, toast etc and she will pick at it, but she won't take a blessed thing off a spoon, at home. At daycare she eats perfectly fine from the spoon and finishes up every last drop of her food. At home she just sits in her chair and screams.

She also does not really want to eat any of the "finger" foods we give her except for grapes and peaches. And a child can not live on grapes and peaches alone. She used to love chicken, now she throws it on the floor. Yesterday by some miracle I got her to eat some pasta with tomato sauce but mostly it is only fruit. We tired not giving her fruit, letting her sit there for a while, ignoring her and then just taking her out of her chair. But she is a stubborn one and will not eat at home. Normally she gets one bottle in the morning (8oz) and one before bed (8oz), and drinks some milk during the day from a cup. We tried to cut down on the bottles to see if she would eat more but that just resulted in her waking up all night howling for another bottle.

Mostly I feel this is a phase and eventually she will eat again, but after 1.5 weeks of fighting every meal time I am getting tired. Did your kids do this? How did you deal with this? And what food did you give your 1 year olds to eat before they could feed themselves with a spoon?

What to do?

2010-08-25T09:59:00.004-04:00

So yesterday Missy had her 1 year shots. It was a little stressful for all of us. Mainly because the MMR shot is a live virus which is egg based. For most people this does not cause any sort of issue, however my dear hubby had an anaphylactic response to eggs as a child, and a still has issues with eggs. Last weekend we prepared scrabbled eggs for Missy so that we could see if she would react to eggs like her dad. She refused to eat them, but around her mouth where the eggs touched her skin she developed some hives. So eggs are off the list for little A, at least for a few years. Not knowing exactly what to do about this I kept our immunization appointment at the health clinic and decided I would consult the nurse.

First let me state that I am a huge huge supporter for immunization. The scientific side of me understands there importance, the safety issues and the risks. I have read the research which suggested vaccines are linked to autism and quite frankly it is very weak, circumstantial and completely lacking in data. In fact for those of you who are not aware the Lancet Journal which originally published the study has retracted it based on a number of inconsistencies. There are a number of news articles written about this "scandal". I have linked one easy read by CNN, which normally I do not find as the most credible source of information, but it is easy to read. You may not agree with me, lots of people do not but I do urge you to discuss things with a qualified medical professional before making snap judgments. I won't even get into the fact that Jenny MaCarthy is not even qualified to offer advice on what you should eat for lunch, let alone the health of your child, no I won't go there. Okay that's all I am going to say on this controversial topic. In addition to logic, there is the motherly instinct which wants to keep my baby from getting any preventable illness.

So back to our appointment. I was definitely going to have Missy immunized against meningitis, but I was pretty torn on what to do about the MMR shot. At 6 months she did receive a flu shot which is also egg based, but not a live virus (it is inactive), and did not have any reaction. When I presented our case history the nurse was a little scared. She said that she had been vaccinating babies for 20 years and never had witnessed an anaphylactic response, and did not want to see it today. However, she was also torn because of the recent outbreaks of measles in Europe, which is readily propagating due to the large number of non-vaccinated children. In the end we decided together that she would get the shot. We had the adrenaline shot ready and I held my breath, baby A screamed and it was over. We waited with the nurse for 45 minutes and thankfully there was no reaction! I am sure that I don't need to explain to people how hard that sort of decision is, and how scared you can be in those moments.

Afterward Missy was a little grumpy, so we went for a walk. She did not run a fever or really complain a lot. She at her dinner, had a bottle and went to bed. Then she woke up at 11:30 and it took me about 2 hours to get her settled again. After lots of cuddles and a little Advil she crashed again for the night. Poor pumpkin.

During our 2 hour cuddle session I got to read the globe and mail. In case you wonder why I read this so much it is because it is an app on my ipod and when she is half asleep I don't want to turn on the tv or lights so I read articles on my ipod. While we were sleep training I did a lot of late night reading. These days it happens only occasionally. Anyways, I was reading the facts and arguments section, which can range from great essays to total verbal diarrhea. I saw this one story that made me smile. It was an essay written by an ex-Torontonian who recently relocated to Calgary. She was commenting on how nice people in Calgary are. It made me smile because it is one of the things I miss the most about living in Calgary. People in Montreal are not nice. They often actively go out of their way to be rude. Anyways, it was a nice thing to read at 1 am.

We survived

2010-08-24T09:37:00.000-04:00

So we survived the big birthday party on Saturday. Unfortunately our little Missy was in a lot of pain. She is cutting her molars, 2 are through and the other ones are just poking through. Those are big freaking teeth! No wonder she was so grouchy. She also does not like crowds. She does not like to be the center of attention and prefers when things are calm and quiet. None of these things described our weekend, and on Saturday there was a crowd of people there to see her. To her credit she held it together until the very end when she was officially finished and we knew it. Anyways, here are a few of my favorite shots from the festivities.

A few pre-party family pics. We don't often get little Missy in a fancy dress.

I made baby carrot cake muffins for Missy and her posse. To my surprise she loved them! However, it took her a while and only really got in there once people stopped looking at her. Then we could barely tear her away.

Missy and her to buddies. She was done at this point.

Interesting blog

2010-08-23T09:39:00.003-04:00

I was reading the globe and mail this weekend and I came across a reference to this new blog. Two well known bloggers south of the border decided to write a blog together about their divorce, challenges of co-parenting, and I am sure the occasional grievance. Both are very good writers and I even though I hope I do not ever have to relate to their situation I am fascinated by how amicable they are, and I tune in regularly to see what is going on.

Its called When Flames Go Up

Just a little something for the Monday morning procrastinators

Wow

2010-08-20T09:23:00.013-04:00

Wow life is busy. Why does it always seem like everything happens all at once? It has only been one week, but it feels more like one month of activity has occurred at our house.

We started last weekend with a BBQ at my boss's house. Baby A wanted to play soccer with the big boys.

Saturday Grandma and Grandpa showed up at 7:00 am. Dylan had to work so I spent most of the day running around doing all the shopping and errands.

Sunday we spent the day at Oka park with our friends Gavin, Suzanne and their lovely little A.

The two little A's love to play together, I call them the "A-Team". They are quite the dynamic duo, opposite in almost every way. My little A is shy, quiet, interested in puzzles and is definitely the planner. Suzanne's missy A is loud, outgoing, easily distracted and is the muscle behind their shenanigans. I love watching them play together.

We had a great day at Oka, it was about 28 degrees but cloudy and they predicted rain in the afternoon. As a result there was almost nobody there. We had a great time splashing, building castles and eating sand. The girls called it quits around 2:30 just as it started to sprinkle. Great day!

That night we had a fun BBQ at our house with some friends who are visiting from Germany, Jon, Jess and my parents. Sadly I was too busy enjoying the company to remember to take any photos.

Monday it was back to work for me and it was the day that I have been anxiously anticipating for over 5 months. We finally got to start to set up the cell culture lab again. I spent the morning bleaching everything in sight, then I drafted the big strong boys in my lab to move the heavy stuff. Our lab looks sort of pathetic pieced together from what I could find in the storage room, but I think I did pretty good with what I had to work with.

I won't be winning any lab decor awards anytime soon but hopefully by the end of the week it will be functional and we can start growing cells again.

Monday night we got all gussied up and headed out for dinner at Mechant Boeuf, a fabulous restaurant in the old port, with our friends from Germany and another couple of friends in Montreal who also happen to know them. After dinner we walked around the old port and then had desert at Jardin Nelson. I love wandering around the old port at night it reminds me so much of being in Europe. However, I do not love walking on cobblestone in high heals. Luckily I was driving and had nothing to drink or I am sure I would have broke my ankle. Oh the price we pay for fashion. Once again I forgot my camera at home but luckily Leo and Mauela had a camera so eventually I will have some photos.

Tuesday was baby A's 1st birthday! We got up early so she could open her presents. She got lots of fun toys but her favorite is the baby in the sled from her Great Grandma. She does not actually love the baby, but in about 2 minutes she figured out that she could throw the baby out of the sled, climb in and go for a ride her self. It has little wheels and she likes to be pulled up and down the hallway in her little sled. Its pretty cute.

At work I did more cleaning and more organizing.

Tuesday afternoon we headed to baby A's daycare for her mini party with her daycare posse. It was really sweet. Amina is an amazing lady, she bakes all the babies a birthday cake and make sure to celebrate each of their birthdays. Our missy does not like all the attention on her (again not like me at all, definitely her daddy's girl) and cried when we were singing her "Happy Birthday"...or maybe it was our horrible singing.

Tuesday night we had a nice dinner with my parents on the deck to celebrate surviving 1 year. We all had veal, including little Missy.

Wednesday we went for a little cinq a sept (5 - 7) fun with our friends Sasa an Jelena, Sasa lives in Santa Barbara so we don't get to see him often. As always there was lots of laughs!

Thursday night was grocery shopping for the rest of the stuff I needed for baby A's party. Then I spent 2 hours making and freezing baby food. Man this little one eats a lot.

And today is Friday once again and I am exhausted! I am having lunch with my friend Claire, dropping in on a RISE meeting, doing my lab stuff, and then going home to clean, marinate meat and bake cakes for the party tomorrow.

Thank god my parents are here, not sure I could have survived this week without the extra sets of hands.

JAW Award #7

2010-08-19T09:45:00.004-04:00

This week I have lots of pent up "stuff" to get off my chest. I am tired, cranky, and sore, but mostly just exhausted and sick of other people's stupidity. So this weeks JAW is actually a collective award to a group of people who have made the last 4 months frustrating and difficult, I am not going to name names, but suffice it to say there is a list and it is longer than it should be.

Lets rewind to 1 year and 9 months ago. I was a happy Post Doc working on my research and one day I realized I was pregnant. It came to me while I was working in the lab, angrily cleaning up after some of my co-workers. I thought to myself "wow, have I got some real PMS", then I thought, "humm that should have been last week, oh crap what day is it". Anyways, the next day pregnant Jody looked around the death trap chemistry lab and decided this was no environment for a fetus, let alone grown healthy adults. There was occasional acetone leaking from our ceiling, a toxic smell that kept being pumped into our room that gave everyone headaches and nausea, and a whole lot of toxic chemicals hanging around. Realizing that the world is a cruel place and a baby with 3 arms and 8 legs would likely not do so well I immediately went to my boss and said "we gotta figure something out". So that began the campaign to move our cell culture lab up the hill to physics. Believe it or not it is cleaner, fresher and much less toxic here. In the meantime I would work only when the air quality was good, spend limited time in the mini Chernoble, and rely on my co-workers to handle the known toxic and tetragenic substances. We were told that we would have some space shortly and we could move the whole circus up the hill. This would actually make my life significantly easier because our imaging facility is also in physics and it would save me from hauling my ever expanding ass up and down the hill all day long. Everybody wins!

Here is a lovely photo of the "old water" which was leaking from our ceiling. You may notice the color, the phase separation and the fact it ate through the styrofoam cooler.

Sadly, I forgot that things in academia have their own time scale, we measure time in epochs rather than days. So in the end we never got a new space until I was 1 week away from materinity leave. Before I left I worked for about 2 weeks, ordering the supplies, preparing solutions and ensuring there was enough stuff for people to do cell culture for 6 months while I was away. I sorted through my desk and got rid of my personal garbage and kept only the important stuff. 4 days before my due date I was off work and my lab mates packed up the lab and it was moved up the hill. That was August 1, 2009.

Last week we finally got the sink and electrical work completed in the new lab, August 10, 2010. Why the delay you ask? Well that is a good question I have no real answer for, nobody cared, nobody felt the need do cell culture work, nobody wanted to expend an ounce of energy, nobody cared about the other people in the lab, all of these are distinct possibilities. But my main conclusion is they knew if they waited long enough I would come back and have to do it for them. Never mind I was taking care of a baby, trying to write 2 papers and do my own work, of course I had time to hound the department head, building director, electricians and plumbers. Of course I had time to unpack all the boxes, clean the lab, set everything up, stock the lab, throw out all the solutions I had made 1 year earlier, and remake all the same solutions. Why the F*&K not.

At some point even my superhuman capabilities have limits and I needed some strong bodies to move furniture. So it was decided that Monday afternoon everyone would show up and help move things into the newly cleaned lab. 5 people showed up and we managed to get the big stuff in place. I then spent the rest of the week cleaning and unpacking boxes with the help of 1 other lab member. Now it is 90% finished. I need to get the supports for tanks in place and then we are good to go. So likely by next week sometime I will once again have a functional cell culture facility, free from acetone leaks, and free from toxic organic solvent smells. One year and 20 some days later, seriously ridiculous.

So this weeks JAW goes to the following:

To the people who packed up the lab and decided to throw glass bottles full of buffer in with metal test tube racks, retord stands and other hard objects. Just so you know the bottles broke, the contents of the box were soaked, some things were ruined and mostly I enjoyed picking out all bits of broken glass. You are a total jackass!

To the person who decided all the garbage in the lab (old papers, random pieces of construction paper, clothes) were some how my personal property and labeled them in boxes for me to sort through and throw out, you made my afternoon so much fun.

To the person who took the broken glass disposable boxes I hauled up the hill last week, thank you so much. It was a nice break to have to take another trip down the hill to get more boxes so I could throw out all the broken beakers, bottles and other assorted glassware that was improperly packed. Luckily I only managed to cut myself once.

To the person who decided it would be fun to sit and watch me unwrap and unpack things for 10 minutes all the while asking me "what I was doing", then proceed to go and watch the other person who is helping wash dishes for a while, dig around for things you may want and then return to watching videos, you are jackass!

To the person who packaged one whole box with just a spoon and mug, not sure what sort of point you were trying to make, but I really appreciated the 4 layers of packing tape I had to cut through just to free a stupid spoon. The time it took you to do this could have been better spend doing about 1 million other useful activities.

To the person who packed up the autoclave and other equipment full of water, you are an real idiot. Seriously you could have drained them it would have taken about 10 minutes. Instead I got to siphon out algae from our supposedly sterile equipment and then spend the rest of the day trying to figure out how to properly disinfect it.

and finally last but certainly not least...

To all those who contributed to this process taking way way longer than it should, I do thank you! Thank you for not doing anything, not organizing the electrical and plumbing renovations. I mean it is not like you were expected to do it yourself, all you had to do was make sure it got done, but clearly that was way too much effort. I know it is hard to actually do something if it does not 100% directly benefit you. Thank you to the electricians who screwed up and said the job was completed when it was not.

Without all of your collective effortless attempts this week would not have been possible. I would not have a stiff sore neck, I would not have bruised legs and sore arms. Really you are all special in your own way.

1 Year!

2010-08-17T22:20:00.006-04:00

Happy 1st birthday to my big girl! It is hard to believe that one year has already passed. You are so grown up already. Sadly I am super busy so I can't write the tribute I would love to...will write more later but here is a sample of some of today's festivities.

JAW Award #6

2010-08-12T09:38:00.005-04:00

Well it is official this week I feel that I deserve the JAW award! Well maybe more of a dumb ass of the week award, but definitely something with the title ass in it. I know it is hard to imagine how someone so composed and sophisticated could be anything less than perfect, but sadly it does happen. Wow, I can't even get through a sentence like that without gagging a little. Anyways, back to why I am an ass (stop making your own list).

So as I have mentioned in previous posts baby A goes to a French day home, and I do not speak French. I am getting better but really it takes time and sometimes there are communication issues between me and the lady who runs the day home. This week the daycare was closed and we did not know that. Okay that is not totally true. She has in the past few weeks mentioned something about a holiday and Ramadan and possibly threw some dates in my direction. Perhaps it was my refusal to acknowledge the fact I had to make other arrangements for this week, but lets for the sake of argument say it was because I did not really understand what she was telling me. My parents are coming next week and my blissful ignorance/fantasy was that the daycare would be closed that week. Dylan and I were discussing it on the weekend and I said I would send an email and ask, well I forgot. So Monday morning rolls around and we decide we will just show up and see what happens. Well when you show up at someones house when they aren't expecting you sometimes you wake them up and then get to see their pajamas. It was rather embarrassing for both of us, me trying to explain how I am stupid and confused and then Amina feeling bad that we did not make other arrangements and offering to watch baby A for the day anyways. In the end we just went back home and had a mommy baby day. Luckily Dylan's cousin Tara is a teacher and not working right now and she could watch A for a few days for us so we could work the rest of the week. Yes my name is Jody and I am a jackass. Ooopsy!

Sadly my buffoonery did not end there. Instead I think I also really freaked out one of the new student in our lab. Before I get into my antics let me say that as of Tuesday we now have electricity in the cell culture room! This is wonderful. I have been fighting people for almost 5 months to get this job done and finally it is done. This means I can start to culture cells again and no more multi-day trips to Quebec! So I was very very happy. We also have a new janitor who mopped the floor in our lab so basically Tuesday felt like Christmas, Halloween, fairies, unicorns and magical mystical wonder all rolled into one. Yup I know that's pretty sad. Anyways, Tuesday I was in a great mood, and I was working in the lab imaging all the cells I plated in Quebec last week. We have a large lab with a big black out curtain on one side preventing me from seeing people working at computers near the windows. We also work with the lights off or pretty low so really you don't always see things on the other side of the room very well. I was working during lunch in the empty lab enjoying my ipod and pretty much totally in my own little world. I did not notice the new student from India come back into the lab. I think he may be a ninja. Anyways, when I am alone I like to sing out loud. I know my voice sounds like someone is squeezing a sick cat so really I am careful not to subject others to this sort of torture. But when I am alone, and more importantly when I have headphones on and can't hear my own screeching, I have been known to get into the song and go for it. Now I don't know exactly what he said because I was too busy singing and working to realize he was there. But this is what he heard...

Me: "Pour some sugar on me. Ooh, in the name of love. Pour some sugar on me, C'mon fire me up. Pour your sugar on me, Oh, I can't get enough. I'm hot, sticky sweet. From my head to my feet yeah"

Him: "what?"

Me: "You got the peaches, I got the cream. Sweet to taste, saccharine. 'Cos I'm hot, say what, sticky sweet. From my head, my head, to my feet"

Yah it was a little embarrassing. Luckily he did not come in 5 minutes earlier or he would have heard something like this...

Me: "behind the bushes, until I'm screamin' for more. Down the basement lock the cellar door. And baby Talk dirty to me"

It is a little known fact that cells are happier and tend to produce better images when they hear some bad 80's rock music.

I Icarus

2010-08-09T21:11:00.002-04:00

This week I am attempting to do something potentially foolish. We are submitting back to back articles to Cell, and part of me thinks I am crazy. Cell is a high impact journal (31.15) and there is a chance that the editors will laugh their asses off and send the articles back. However, there is also a chance they will go to review and then I have to wait patiently hoping that the experts see the same beauty in my work as I do. I feel a little excited and a little like Icarus with wax wings flying dangerously close to the sun. Writing this article has been a real experience, I have learned a lot about the process of writing for a big journal and I feel a little like I lost my virginity all over again. I used to be naive and think the science could speak for itself, now I know it is a careful game of saying just enough to make people think your work is great and then delicately bashing others work but remembering to be delicate because they could be your reviewer. Well I have no idea how this little exercise will turn out but I have a lot of crossed fingers, toes, and even some legs.

All of this writing and last minute hullabaloo meant that last week I had my very first multiday work trip to the mental institute since baby A was born. Two years ago I practically lived in Quebec City, but it has been a long time since I had to live in hotel rooms, getting no sleep and eating crappy food. It also meant that Dylan had his first 3 days alone with baby A. They both survived, and they were both happy to have me home.

One thing I have learned is a new way to keep people from sitting next to you on the bus. Normally I try to be just weird enough to keep people away but not too weird because then other really weird people may try and befriend you. It is difficult to find the balance sometimes, crying too much or too little can really lead to a long unpleasant bus ride. This week I found that if you hold a big white cooler with bright orange biological biohazard stickers all over it people stay away from you. Just to be sure when they asked I told them it was full of kidneys and hearts. Really it was just a few drugs and growth media, but it bought me a lot of leg room.

As it turns out I did a lot of laughing hysterically and little real crying on the bus, but I made sure nobody saw me. This actually happens to me a lot in public when I am reading a book or watching a movie. This time I was listening to pod casts of the Vinyl Cafe and sometimes those stories are just super sucky and sad and I can't help but squeeze out a few tears. Other times I find the stories so funny I can't help but laugh, then I end up laughing at myself for laughing, realize that people think I am crazy and then it seems physically impossible to stop laughing. This also happens to me a very inappropriate times like funerals, weddings and other occasions when I am supposed to be calm and composed. Yah, I have some quirks.

Speaking of quirks...The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, that was intense. I am told the book is better. I forgot it was a European movie and I quickly remembered that we in North America are a little prudish and that seems to translate into our movies. I did not hate the movie, I thought a lot of it was good, but there were parts that seemed to move slower than molasses up hill in December.

You might be a jackass if....

2010-08-05T20:51:00.000-04:00

So in the past week I have encountered many mini jackasses, not deserving of a full JAW but still jackassery none the less. To the credit of most mini jackasses, I am sure they don't realize they are being jackasses, in fact I can gaurentee that on many occasions I myself have been guilty of a little jackassery, I know its shocking but true. To help you identify your own JA behavior I have complied a small list of activities which would make you jackass. Sadly I got to witness each of this ridiculous acts first hand....

Jody's list Of You Might be a Jackass If.....

1. You make a right hand turn from the far left lane and cutting off an emergency vehicle. Granted they did not have their flashers on, but still who cuts off an ambulance?

2. You proceed through a red light in order to park in the middle of a busy intersection and completely block all traffic attempting to cross the intersection.

3. You drop half of my apples on the floor of the store and try and sneak them back into my bag when you think I am not looking. Yup I saw you!

4. You arrive in line and inform me that you were in line 2 minutes ago but had to run back to get more paper towel, and then demand your place back. Sorry no savesies!

5. Instead of evenly distributing my groceries in the 4 bags I purchased you cram them all in 2 bags, hand me the half ripped bursting bags with my buns smushed below the canned goods, and then proudly hand me the two unused bags and inform me that I can use them again next time.

6. You merge onto the highway and promptly cut across 2 lanes of traffic to do 95 kms an hour in the fast lane.

7. You leave your tv on full blast all night long in a really old hotel with paper thin walls and then complain loudly and swear at 7am when my alarm goes off.

8. You trap guests at your hotel with your maid cart in the corner of the elevator and refuse to let them off at their floor because you are in a hurry.

9. You grap up other peoples luggage throw it around a little, realize it's not yours and then leave it upside down on the ground and walk away.

10. If I order 2 milkshakes and you hand me one which is full and one which is 3/4 full after waiting for 15 minutes and then are surprised when I send it back and ask where the other 1/4 is, you are definitely a jackass.

Happy Thursday!

Chenenville

2010-08-02T21:07:00.001-04:00

This past weekend we packed up almost our entire house and moved it to Cheneville for 2 days to hang out with a few of my co-workers and expose baby A to some nature. We brought our tent but due to the very cold nights we opted to stay in our friends house, that and we forgot to pack the sleeping bags. I guess we got distracted by the other 200 bags of stuff. While I was quite prepared for what we needed to bring for "roughing it with a baby" my dear pack mule husband was not. Packing the car was a fun exercise in marital relations. It went a little something like this...

Dylan: "we don't need all this crap"
Me: "yes we do, trust me"
Dylan: "no we need to get better at packing"
Me: "No we need a bigger car"
Dylan: "Next time I am packing"
Me: "Well that should be interesting"
Dylan: "Like this, do we really need to bring a portable bed for A?"
Me: "yah, where else is she going to sleep?"
Dylan: "On the floor in some pillows"
Me: "Ah no that is not really safe or fair for her"
Dylan: "Whats this, do we need this, I am going to throw this crap out"
Me: "Well that would be our food, I think we need that"
Dylan: "Where did all this stuff come from?"
Me: "What you meant to say was thank you for spending 2 days doing laundry, packing and organizing"

It's an on going battle, I do my best to ware him down and he does his best to keep me from accumulating too much stuff. We balance each other out somehow. Anyways, we went to Cheneville and we got lost but we did find this super morbid sign. Sorry its rotated I am having issues with Dylans computer.

Basically it reminds you not to speed because this dead kid could be yours. Welcome to Chenville. We got there a few hours before Mikhail so we decided to wander around and take some photos in the amazing glowing yellow light.

Friday night we hung out with Mikhail, made a fire and grilled some meat. We sat and marvelled at the sky and how bright the stars were. We all headed to bed a little late and missy decided to get us up nice and early, I guess she heard some roosters far off in the distance. So we got up brewed some coffees and headed out for a walk to wake ourselves up. Well we woke up and then baby A decided to have a nap. What a kid!

On Saturday we headed to Lac Simon. Baby A loved the beach! We were not sure she would like it but she sat quietly digging and eating her sand. She also filled our sandwiches with sand and licked our buns until they were mushy. Sometimes being a parent means eating mushy sandy sandwiches.

We hung out at the beach for a few hours until Dylan got nice and sun burnt. There were a few others there who clearly had never heard of skin cancer and were doing their best to look like grilled meat. The one thing I will miss about living in Quebec is the relaxed rules about having a beer on the beach. Basically if you have a beer with food nobody hassles you, its rather civilized.

A few more friends from work joined us on Saturday for a BBQ dinner. It was really fun sitting around and relaxing in the grass and listening to some music, mental note do this more often.

We grilled a lot of meat...sorry vegetarians but it was yummy! I think there were baked potatoes in there somewhere. But really nothing tastes better than meat grilled outside over a fire. Its heavenly.

The property was beautiful, great landscape, very raw and rustic. Rolling hills and patches of trees everywhere. Our friends chalet needs a little TLC but had a working bathroom, wood burning stove to heat the house and a fully functional kitchen complete with working laundry so really what more do you expect.

The only thing which was a little disconcerting was the mouse infestation. Having slight hypochondriac tendencies as I do my mind immediately went to Hantavirus mode so I spent the whole weekend on mouse poop alert. I also washed every single item we brought with us before I let it back in the house. Maybe a little over the top, maybe but thats me, either love me or go away. However as I was washing all the stuff we packed I thought to myself "do we need all this crap", but I did not dare say it out loud.

All in all it was a pretty fun adventure. We are all a little darker, a little dirtier and a whole lot more relaxed.

Baby A Update

2010-07-30T12:04:00.004-04:00

It has been a very long time since I have had a post dedicated to my favorite offspring. Alright so I currently have only one offspring, but she is still my favorite. It is hard for me to believe that she will be 1 in just a few weeks. Somehow we all survived this year and even though things did not start out as we planned baby A fits right into our family, just like she has always been there. Here are her current stats:

Height: 28.5 inches
Weight: 20 - 23 pounds (we have not weighed her in a few weeks)
Teeth: 8 full teeth + 2 more tips poking through
Crawling: yes at full speed
Walking: a few steps on her own before she falls
Sleeping: sleeps from 7pm - 6am without getting up!!!!
Naps: sometimes she will have 2 short 30 - 45 minute rests if she feels like it
Favorite food: macaroni & cheese with broccoli and cauliflower and any fruit except blueberries
Favorite toy: plastic Easter eggs from Dollarama
Favorite book: Hand hand fingers thumb (yes I know the whole book, sometimes I read it so much it appears in my dreams)
Favorite word: Dog (every animal is a dog, including squirrels, birds, and cats)

Some other interesting facts about my little monkey:

Baby A goes to a small day home with 4 little boys, she is the youngest by 2 months and the oldest is only about 18 months. She likes them all but one, she is currently obsessed with Adam and now calls everybody including me and her dad Adam. She loves Adam. I keep asking Dylan if it is too early to start polishing the guns. She also understands 3 languages, English, French and Arabic. She may be speaking in Arabic too but we wouldn't understand if she did. It is a little embarrassing when your 11 month old understands more French than you do.

She is also very independent and stubborn, not that I would have any clue as to where she got those traits from. She is okay if you show her how to do something but if you try and help her do something she gets very angry and usually throws what ever it is that you are tying to help her with. Later when you go away she will go back and do what ever she was trying to do, but you can not help her.

She loves books. Right from 2 months on we read her a few books everyday. Books help relax her, when she is crying or upset we read a book and she forgets about what set her off in the first place. She likes to turn the pages and gets mad if you do it.

Baby A is also very shy and quiet, traits she did not get from me that is for sure. In a large crowd she prefers to stick close to mom and dad and only about surveying the situation carefully for about 30-45 minutes does she attempt to interact with new people. She is very gentle and loving when she does interact with others, again not my style but it works for her.

Our little A also has many quirks, which I guess definitely makes her my child. She spends a large portion of her time pointing out my poor house keeping skills. If there is even a speck of dirt on the floor she will crawl up to it, point and make a fuss until you come and pick it up. She is getting better at picking up lint and small things and bringing them to me to throw out, but for some reason it bothers her to have "stuff" on the floor. She has also identified all of the defects in our 65 year old hardwood floors, believe me there are a lot more than I thought. I guess when you spend so much time down there you want to keep your domain nice and clean. Her other quirk is that she likes her toys set up in particular ways, if you set them up "wrong" and she spots it (even out of the corner of her eye) she will stop what she is doing, fix it and resume her previous task. You can do this over and over again, its fun for me. Although I am sure it really pisses her off.

So there you have it, a little update on my soon to be big girl!

Have a great weekend everybody!

JAW Award #5

2010-07-29T12:00:00.000-04:00

Well my worst fear has come true, I have no recipients for my amazing award this week. I did not come in contact with anyone this week deserving of the illustrious title, maybe that makes me the jackass of the week, possibly.

Well I am going out of town this weekend and then heading to Beauport next week so I am sure I will find a few winners on my travels. Until then happy Thursday everybody!

Busy bee

2010-07-28T09:19:00.003-04:00

Do you ever wonder what people are doing when they don't post on their blogs for a while? I do, although I usually imagine it is something fun and festive. However in reality I am sure they are busy doing normal mundane activities, just like me. I have A LOT of little things that need to be done so I am running around trying to get them all accomplished in my normal manic panic Jody fashion. I typically deal with these items in a way I like to refer to as management by crisis. The most immediately due, dangerous,harmful,scary things first, then I pick and choose jobs based on what seems least frustrating and horrible. I also avoid jobs that require me to phone someone. I actually hate using the telephone. The interweb is so much more effective. I can listen to music, drink my coffee and type away at my own leisure. I can even type horrible nasty things and then erase them when I realize I am being an ass, you can't edit live conversations. Sadly, a large pile of things of my desk are now requiring me to phone various customer service departments so I guess I will be scrubbing the incubator, emptying the garbage, doing a lit search and updating our cryo records first, yup thats how much I hate talking on the phone.

Why do I hate talking on the phone so much? Not sure, as a teenager the phone was practically my 5th appendage. Literally every night I would spend about 3 - 4 hours on the phone. Today I get on, get to the point and get off as quick as possible. Its not antisocial, its efficient. If you want to chat lets go for a coffee, a walk or something face to face.

So that is why I have no creative fun posts these days, my creative juices have dried up, every now and then I can manage a small drizzle or squirt but that's it. Right now all my energy is used up preparing to go out of town this weekend to a friends Chalet in the country for some R&R, and then next week I am off to mental hospital again for 3 days. After that I have a week before my parents arrive and a big birthday party to plan for my little monkey. After my parents leave, Dylan's mom arrives for an indeterminate amount of time followed by his dad, hopefully a trip to Ottawa for his brothers defense and a kitchen to tile. So yah when I am not posting its not because I am off having some wild adventure, its because I am being buried alive with tasks.

I knew it!

2010-07-27T15:18:00.002-04:00

Ha ha, I knew it. Men are just as mushy as us hormone crazed ladies...well at least based on this very funny article.

I guess there is nothing left for me to do but sit back drink a beer and admire my hardwood floors and let Dylan take over.

Sticks and carrots may break some bones but labels really piss me off

2010-07-26T08:52:00.006-04:00

Once again the weekend has come and gone. There is a long list of items that did not get done this weekend but I am in the "who gives a crap" phase of my cyclic mental state. I actually like this phase, there is much less pressure in this phase. Next week when I realize that the house is a disaster, my parents are coming and I have a birthday party to plan the manic phase will kick in and the high gear cleaning/organizing will commence. But this is manana week.

I wish I did not have to work this week, I am just not feeling "it" this week. Last week was very busy, I spent most of the time running around between labs/buildings and essentially accomplishing very little. I hate those weeks, you are so tired and exhausted by the end and you have nothing to show for all that energy. I did learn a two important lessons last week.

1. While I often prefer the carrot to the stick, at some point it becomes necessary to use the carrot and the stick to beat some sense into people. I was nice and polite (diplomatic even) for 3 months, that got me no where, I put on my witches hat, dug out my broom and low and behold, results. I hate when it has to come to that but sometimes there are no other options. I hate it because inevitably it leads to the label "bitch", when really if you just did what you were supposed to 1 year ago we wouldn't be having this conversation. How does you being a total and complete a-hole make me a bitch?

2. Sometimes you just have to suck it up and do it. There are lots and lots of things I don't want to do on a daily basis but it is my job. So I do it. I may not always smile and sing while I go about my task but I do it because that is what needs to be done. Complaining about it does not make it go faster, whining about it does not make it less boring, and ignoring it does not make it go away. Often once it is over you realize it was not so bad/horrible/difficult. As my husband likes to say, "if you job is eating bees than you better eat some bees."

Needless to say I hope this weeks episode of the funny farm plays research lab is slightly less ridiculous.

Good Vibrations

2010-07-22T12:57:00.002-04:00

It seems I am in need of some positive energy. So here are some things that make me happy.

1.Sewing. I am currently doing a lot of little sewing projects. I used to sew when I was younger, but have not bothered to do much since we moved and I hemmed all the curtains. I did help Dylan sew his Halloween costume a few years ago but mostly I did that stitching by hand. When my mom came to visit I had her make baby A a blanket. I loved it and wanted to make one for our cousin’s who are having a baby. I was so happy with how it turned out that I have been sewing ever since. So from now on I am making our baby gifts. Do I have a lot of time to devote to a new hobby, not really but I find the time. It is actually very relaxing for me. The best part is when I am done I can look at my work, I can touch my work and I feel like I have accomplished something. You don’t get that feeling very often in research. So much of my stuff is intangible and conceptual so it is nice to hold something in your hands and say “I did that”. So yes, love sewing.

2.Fruit. Love fruit. If I could I would probably live on fruit. It is almost blueberry season here in Quebec and I can’t wait to make fresh blueberry pie.

3.Sleep. Love getting sleep. Since getting over the last round of illness baby A is once again sleeping like an angel. Which means mamma gets a full night sleep and is less likely to hurt herself and others.

4.My friends. I have great friends. Just when I feel like I am totally coming unglued one of my many amazing friends comes along and reminds to breath. It is like a re-set button. Thanks guys!

5. My Family, that big hairy guy that keeps coming home every night and reminding me why I love him, and that little one that warms my heart with her smile. They are pretty great.

So there, my blog is not all rants and raves, there is some sunshine mixed in every once in a while.

JAW Award #4

2010-07-21T12:06:00.002-04:00

Sorry for the glich yesterday when blogger posted half of this post. It was actually my fault. I typically work on a few posts at once during my coffee/lunch break and instead of hitting save I hit publish, oopsy!

So this week I am awarding Jackass and Jillass (female jackass's) awards to two very clueless cellphone users. First off I HATE cellphones. I do not hate the idea of cell phones, in reality it makes sense. I did finally break down and buy one when the baby came, I use it for emergencies. What I hate about cell phones is the complete lack of social etiquette which is associated with their use. Fist of all, if we are eating dinner together do not answer your phone. Put your phone on vibrate, you are not that important that you can not get through a meal without taking a call. Second of all, if you make plans with me to do something do not spend a bunch of time talking on the phone. If you would rather sit alone at home and talk on the phone do that, but don't waste my time. And lastly, do not answer your phone during a meeting, lecture, movie or anything where there are large groups of people who are all giving up their time to be there, it is just rude. Ahhh, that felt good. Okay rant over, returning to the regularly scheduled program. This week the two recipients of my illustrious award are both socially unaware cell phone users.

#1. I was driving to work this week (a task which usually makes me annoyed to begin with), and as I turned this corner onto a fairly busy street in the Ghetto I had to slam on my breaks to avoid hitting this man who was standing in the middle of the street looking up at the sky and talking on his cellphone. He was not a construction worker or a city survey person just a guy in a suit with a briefcase standing in the middle of the road talking on his cell phone. I honked my horn because there was a large line of cars forming behind me and as he SLOWLY weaved down the street (still in the actual street), he turned around and gave me the finger and yelled "I am on the phone". "Oh your on the phone, well by all means stand in the middle of the street, I can wait it is not like I have anything better to do than sit here and watch you talk on the phone." Total jackass.

#2. Baby and A make frequent trips to Starbucks in our neighbourhood, she likes to watch the people and I need my fix. I have become quite skilled at holding open the door with my butt (I think that is why your butt gets bigger when you have kids, so that you can use it as a door stop) backing up the stroller, whipping it around and then holding open the second door with my leg in a semi-split pose, and steering the stroller through with one hand. It is not graceful but it works. I often run over my toes because steering with one hand is not ideal but it gets the job done. On rare occasions someone will witness this well choreographed move and hold open the door for us. That is nice. This weeks Jillass was not that helpful of a person. Instead as I am in the semi-split pose with baby A's stroller handles rammed into my stomach and my foot pinched between the door and the stroller wheel Miss JA and her junior JA posse decide that I was holding the door open for them and proceed to move at a glacial speed through the door all talking on their cell phones (to different people of course). Never mind that one of them hit A in the head with their purse, Miss JA turned to me as she left the second door and mouthed the words "thanks". "Oh your so welcome you totally clueless pylon. It is not like you would want to risk breaking a nail opening the door or waiting for the lady with the baby to get out of the way." Total Jillass.

If I ruled the world cell phone etiquette would be mandatory. There is reason phone booths existed, so people did not have to hear your conversations, and so that you were isolated in some area where you could not disrupt the daily activities of the rest of the world.

Mondays

2010-07-20T10:42:00.005-04:00

I hate when Tuesday feels like Monday. No week should have two Mondays. Sadly today I think I have a case of the Mondays. I feel a little fuzzy and sleepy and nothing seems to be working. The cells I thawed yesterday decided to die, maybe they hate Mondays too. Not that I should be surprised, science never works on Monday, or Tuesdays for that matter. The science gods are funny that way. Not until you have sacrificed enough tears and recited enough swear words do they decide to bless you with good results. This miracle typically occurs between 4:00 - 5:00 pm on a Friday. Just as you are about to give up and go home, things work. Yes they have a sense of humor. Sometimes you can expedite this process by abstaining from sleep, nutrition (vending machine food is does not count as nutrition so that is good news) and all forms of social interaction, but that sort of reverence can only go on for so long. Today I am willing to try a new offering, a live sacrifice of a co-worker, maybe that will help my little darlings grow so I can once again do my experiments.

Well enough about my boring work stuff. Today I forgot how old I was, does that happen to you? I was driving and suddenly I realized I could not remember how old I was. I knew that I was in my 30's but for about 2 minutes I could not remember if I was 30 of 31. Its a good thing I am a whiz at mental math. I guess that is a sure sign you are getting older, when the actual number does not matter as long as you know the general decade that is good enough.

I also realized how much I loath Bixi bikes. For those of you who do not have the displeasure of having Bixi in your city, they are public access bikes. There are many bike stands all over the city and the idea is you either enter your bixi card or your credit card, it unlocks a bike, you ride the bike and return it to any of the bike stands in the city. In theory it is great, but remember communism also sounded pretty good on paper. Why do I hate Bixi? It is not that I am opposed to having people ride bikes, but I am opposed to the general public riding bikes. Most people who bike on a regular basis understand how to share the road with cars. Bixi riders apparently do not. Instead of riding down the painted off bike lane they insist on peddling very slowly (remember they don't ride very often or they would have their own bike) right in the middle of the road, the part where cars go. Additionally, Bixi riders do not wear helmets. We do not have helmet laws here in Montreal and most people who rent these bikes do not carry helmets with them. So it makes playing my favorite game of Bixi slalom a little scary. As I watch the riders wobble and weave in front of me I keep picturing their heads splattered all over the road and it makes me a little nervous.

I am also currently fighting with one of our suppliers to get our account updated. We moved our lab up to the physics building last August. Nobody bothered to update the shipping information for one of our biggest suppliers, I guess nobody needed any supplies in the last year, go figure. Anyways, I am in charge of ordering and I need to order some supplies. I call the customer service number and request a change of address for our account so that I can do our on-line ordering. The polite monkey informed me I had to submit the request in writing via email. That was 15 days ago. Every 2 days I submit a new request. So far nothing. When I called back to inquire when they may get around to typing the new address into their computer I was told they have to recalculate our shipping costs because the postal code is different. FANTASTIC! We are less than 3 blocks from the Chemistry building but yes I can see how the shipping cost would be different. After all once drive the truck up the hill it must add an extra $10 of fuel surcharges but really you would probably need to just dispatch a whole new truck and driver, that is the only logical way to deal with such a situation. So I am still waiting, and in the meantime I think I will start a lab pool, my bet is they will eventually get around to it by day 21. That is the kind of efficiency and dedicated customer service that makes me think this company is based in Quebec.

Well I think I have procrastinated enough for one day. Happy Monday #2.

Mixed gender bathrooms?

2010-07-19T11:57:00.002-04:00

How do you feel about mixed gender public bathrooms? Total disaster of an idea, great place to meet woman, or sure why not?

Why am I thinking of mixed gender bathrooms? Well once again the woman's bathroom on our floor is flooding and leaking everywhere. I could go up or down a floor to another woman's bathroom but that would require way more energy than I have right now so instead I just went into the men's bathroom. As I previously stated I pee very quickly and I figured if I washed my hands in our lab I could be in and out before anybody noticed. Well my little plan worked the first time, but I am not sure I can get away with it again. Then I started thinking, why can't I use the men's bathroom. Why do we even need gender specific bathrooms in the work place. Remember Ally McBeal, that bathroom looked like so much fun, we could be having that kind of fun. Okay not really because nobody in the physics department looks like Portia de Rossi, but it could work.

I realize that places like malls or amusement parks where younger kids/teenagers typically hang out the idea of a mixed bathroom could spell disaster. But aside from that aren't we all adults? Obviously the mixed bathroom would not have urinals, that would be uncomfortable, but if it had standard stall doors what would be the difference doing your business beside a guy or a girl? On my recent trip to Quebec City I discovered two mixed gender public bathrooms. At first it seemed strange, only because it is not "normal", but there were men and woman in there and nobody else seemed to care. Is this just one of those things that we have become so fussy and prudish about?

Today was not the first time I used a men's bathroom, and it probably won't be the last. When I was doing my undergrad degree at U of S the chemistry building only had woman's bathrooms on every 2nd floor, it was built in a time when woman did not attend school and definitely did not study chemistry. So I often went in the men's bathroom when nobody was around. Really it is a place to pee and wash your hands. A few times I would run into a male and they would look at me and I would just pretend I accidentally went into the wrong bathroom, ooopsy! (it is okay to play ditsy sometimes if you need to). None of those men every really seemed to care either so really I ask again, why do we need 2 bathrooms in the workplace?

What do you expect?

2010-07-16T14:18:00.000-04:00

Its Friday, I am tired, a little annoyed by some work related issues, my feelings are a little hurt and I have not had enough stimulants this morning to be my usual perky cheerful self. I blame the rain. Anyways, here are a few random thoughts/experiences I had this week.

1. It takes me 39 seconds to pee, yes I timed it. That is the average time (of course I did multiple trials, n=5 to be exact) it takes me to remove my pants/skirt sit down, pee, wipe and put my bottoms back on. Now I realize that most people out there do not belong to the Olympic speed peeing team like I do, but seriously why does it take some ladies 3 or 4 minutes to go pee and get out of the stall? There is no mirror in there, so really do you just sit in there and contemplate life for a while? Are you mentally redecorating your house, writing a shopping list or doing some secret eating? More importantly, if there is a huge line and there is only one or two working stalls try to be a little more efficient.

2. I can still thread a sewing machine after 1 beer, it is a little trickier after 2 beers, but after 3 beers it is pretty much impossible. I think I just invented a new sobriety test. It is also impossible for me to tread the dam thing once I have popped a couple of dristan cold pills, I guess sewing machines count as heavy machinery.

3. It is not a good idea to drink an extra large caramel corretto frapachino at 4 pm. That much sugar and caffeine leaves me a little buzzy. I am sure if you stood next to me you would realize I was actually vibrating. I did manage to get a lot of chores done but it made it impossible to fall asleep (I am part of the slow metabolizing population). That is horrible feeling, my mind was done, I wanted to sleep but my body did not cooperate.

4. I missed the bench. Crazy but true. I like doing science, I hate writing about science. Because our lab is still in total disarray I have now found a new lab to work in while we sit and wait for the electricians to get their s&*t together. Since returning to work in May I have focused on writing two papers and started a third. Today I went over to my new space and did some actual science. It felt good, it felt comfortable and calming. I shut my brain off for a while so I could concentrate on what I was doing and it felt nice. Maybe that is why I like doing bench work so much, I get to shut off the annoying commentary and continual processing of social interactions area of my brain and turn on the super dexterity manual part of my brain. These two areas can not simultaneously operate or my system would crash, I guess my brain has a Windows operating system, maybe its time to upgrade to a MAC.

5. Expectations are dangerous. If you have them inevitably you will be disappointed. It sucks when someone tells you that you are not meeting their expectations, and it is worse when you realize that you don't think you can meet their expectations. I am a busy lady and at some point I am going to let someone down, it happens. I used to think I could be superwoman but now I know that is not going to happen. I have traded in my super sexy tights and cape for a more practical costume, sorry but until I discover otherwise I am only human. Note to self and rest of world, lower your expectations it is rather liberating.

Anyhoooo, its Friday and that is great! Have a fun weekend.

JAW Award #3

2010-07-15T14:01:00.000-04:00

Wow it is really easy to find new and wonderful people to give this award to every week. At first I wondered if it would be difficult to find someone each and every week but no as it turns out there are lots of jack asses running around. This week's jack ass once again is a man (really I am not sexist, but it just happens to all be men so far) and once again it also has to do with a line (man I need to get out more than just to the store and work).

Anyways, this week recipient was found at the supermarket. At almost all major supermarkets now they have self checkout tills, at least in Montreal. There are about 6 of them and they are very easy to use. I really like to use them because I don't like how cashiers pack my groceries, thanks but if I wanted bruised fruit and tomatoes I would throw them around myself. I enjoy scanning things and listening to the beep and I love to type in fruit codes, I played cashier a lot as a kid. So when I go shopping I get to play grocery store cashier and that is part of the "fun" for me. Using these self serve checkouts are not entirely trivial. For example, you have to type in the fruit code and put the stuff on the scale, and you have to follow the instructions the annoying voice gives you, "please scan the next item and place it in the bag," and when you forget to place it in the bag "please place the last item in the bag". Basically it is not rocket science, but it does require some modicum of common sense and ability to listen to and follow instructions. I realize right away that excludes half of our population (remember 50% of people are below average, statistics don't lie).

The wonderful thing about these self checkouts is that they are not mandatory. If you do not want to use them or don't know how to use them , if they scare you or if like to make small talk with the super snarky cashier you can still go and have someone else ring in your groceries. Just like the last 300 times you have gone shopping the old style cashier is still there. Sadly it seems that some people who have the technical competence of a goldfish are still drawn to new technology like moths to a flame. This weeks jack ass is that very moth.

Like all other working people I am stuck doing my shopping on a weekend when it is busy and crowded. After one hour of playing bumper carts I made my way to the self check out. I lined up behind a young guy with about 20 items in his cart. I quickly scanned, no veggies or fruit, no meat or any other complicated items. It should have been straight forward. When it was his turn he stepped up to the till and then stood there for 2 minutes scratching his head like a large gorilla. I guess the option of French of English really stumped him. Then he proceeded to push the help button continuously until the annoyed clerk came over. She explained he had to select a language and follow the instructions. Scan each item and place it in the bag on the scale. She walked away and he started. What was puzzling was the fact that he spoke English but selected the French option. At that point I should really have volunteered to take over for him but part of me was curious as to how long this could possibly take so I took out my cell phone and started to time the exercise. he scanned one item and then put it back in his cart, in his re-usuable bag (he did not put the bags on the scale even though the clerk told him to). The annoying voice started "please place the last item back in the bag". So the monkey stood there pulling the item out of the bag and putting it back in. He tried to scan more items and the stupid machine went ballistic. He kept pressing help and the annoyed clerk kept coming over and scanning an item and placing it on the scale. Then he would take it off the scale and put it in his bag in the cart, and once again the voice would start, hew as confused and the clerk would return. This cycle repeated itself for the entire 20 items in his cart. It took an fantastic 12 minutes and 19 seconds for this debacle to end. By that point I was laughing so hard I almost peed myself, the clerk however was not as amused. This guy was definitely a jack ass.

Homesick

2010-07-13T10:52:00.006-04:00

Right now I am missing my hometown. I grew up in Calgary, and I miss being there in the summer. I don't miss it much in winter, although Montreal is actually worse in winter, but it is the summer that makes me a little homesick. It is not that the city itself is beautiful or stunning, but I miss my summer activities.

I miss going to the Stampede! I love the Stampede, I love the rodeo, the chuck wagons, the food and just being on the grounds. Until we moved here I never missed a single year. Now I watch the rodeo and chucks on-line, but it is not the same.

I miss hiking and spending time in the mountains. People here keep reminding me there are mountains here too. To that I say, those are not mountains. I miss the beautiful pristine high mountain lakes, snow covered peaks and untouched wilderness. I miss hiking, being so exhausted but fulfilled at the end.

I miss the big wide open sky. I miss driving on the highway and seeing the yellow wheat fields swaying in the wind. I have prairie blood in my veins and wide open emptiness makes me happy. Large sky scrapers and crowded streets are fun for a while but I get claustrophobic in the summer heat.

Most of all I miss my friends and family. I am okay, just a little homesick today.

Coyote Woman

2010-07-12T12:31:00.004-04:00

Is it Monday already? What happened to Saturday and Sunday. Oh right, housework, painting, laundry, shopping, and a few all night cry fests with one sick little monkey. I need a do-over. Anyways, it is Monday and I guess I can't change that fact no matter how hard I sit here and scheme.

I have so many random thoughts going around in my brain, none of them seem cohesive or related so it is hard to know what to write. Life is great/crazy/busy as usual, nothing out of the ordinary so I guess I should pick another topic for today. Work is pretty good/normal, nothing there, and today I feel too mellow to rant. Maybe I am on the downward cycle of my mania, who knows.

Anyways, last night Dylan and I got to do something together we have not done in a long time. Read. I know you were hoping for something racy or exciting but this is not that kind of blog. It is actually surprisingly hard for us to find time to lay down together in bed and read. Usually one or both of us are passed out from exhaustion and staying up to read something seems more like punishment than pleasure. But lately I have found myself missing it a lot and I am now scheduling some downtime for reading. What do I like to read, well one of my favorite things to read are short stories. They are great for me because I can read a story or two and then go to bed. If I don't get back to my book for 3 -6 months then it is okay. It is hard for me to finish a book because I often have to read for work and after a whole day of reading the last thing I want to do is read for pleasure so it often happens that novels get started and then get abandoned half way through. So short stories, love them!

For Dylan's birthday I bought him a collection of Hemingway stories. He loves Hemingway and I figured while he was away in Vancouver he would have way more time on his hands. I remember reading one story when I was in my first year of Mount Royal Collage called "Hills Like White Elephants", a very popular Hemingway story. I was 18 when I read the story the first time, and I did not really like it. I also missed completely that the story was about abortion, my essay was on something totally different. I remember getting a bad grade and saying "what ever" and not giving it another thought. Well I decided that I would re-read the story and see if this time I picked up on the none to subtle context. This time it was very clear to me what they were talking about. I am not sure if it was because I knew what it was about, or if the last 12 years of experience and worldly knowledge would have led me to figured it out on my own. In any case I felt very differently about the story this time around. It is a very well written piece and it gave Dylan and I lot to discuss. It is amazing how much your prescriptive changes over time.

Re-reading the story prompted me to go and get the anthology of stories we had used in that class and re-read one of the stories I remember loving. It is by Pam Houston, entitled "How to Talk to a Hunter", from her book Cowboys are my weakness. I still loved the story, although once again I found myself realizing that 12 years of experiences changed my feelings somewhat. Even at 18 I would not say I was naive. I understood the story in a real way, I had my own Hunter and he had a Janie Coyote. I had been hurt and I used this story to support my feelings that most men were incapable of being faithful and loving. Since then I have played the part of the main character again, I have also been the hunter, and I have been the Coyote woman. Not to say I am proud of all of these characters I played, but I have seen love from a few angles now and it is not as simple as I believed it to be when I was 18. When I was younger I criticized the female for ignoring the hunters behavior, I called her desperate and weak. I labeled the Coyote woman as a whore and I hated the hunter. At the time it was all very simple and easy to sort the charaters in their appropriate catagories. Since then I know it is not so black and white. I know that people don't always fit into the appropriate catagories despite what your think of their actions. Sometimes you can love someone so much and it is still not enough, and then sometimes with the right person it is more than enough. It is still a great story, and I wanted to share it with my readers because I think many people have been the main character, the hunter and the coyote woman.

More Musical Trivia

2010-07-09T15:02:00.000-04:00

I had an interesting response to my last post where I shared some of my favorite lines from songs. I had a surprising number of people email me to ask if they had guessed the right songs. Since I am fresh out of funny, witty or angry stories I thought I would share a few more of my favorite lyrics from songs I listened to this week.

1."sometimes reputations outlive their applications and sometimes fires don't go out, when you're done playing with them"
2."but you and I we’ve been through that, and this is not our fate"
3."It's love's illusions I recall, I really don't know love at all"
4."but the beauty of this vision alone just like yesterday's sunset has been perverted by the sentimental and mistaken for love"
5."Somewhere there's a stolen halo I use to watch her wear it well"
6."Gonna make you like the way they lie better than the truth. They tell you everything you wanted someone else to say"
7."He put the bottle to his head and pulled the trigger and finally drank away her memory"
8."I was standing, you were there, two worlds collided"
9."And when your looking for your freedom, nobody seems to care"
10."And I wonder, when I sing along with you, if everything could ever feel this real forever. If anything could ever be this good again"

Looking back at the list it would appear I have somewhat of a love theme going this week. Not really sure what to say about that other than even though some of these songs seem depressing many of them remind me of a some wonderful memories. It is dangerous to read to much into musical lyrics.

JAW Award #2

2010-07-08T10:01:00.002-04:00

So it is time for this weeks Jack Ass award and today without question it goes to the idiot at Walmart. I know, I know how can you specify which idiot at Walmart there are so many in fact you could give out a bucket of awards there if you wanted but sometimes one person sticks out who is especially deserving of this award.

So most people in the world understand the concept of a line. I did a quick informal survey of the people in our lab, representing at least 8 countries and all of them have heard of lines and understand how they work. The first person who arrives in the line goes first, the second person goes second, and so on. It is not based on how much stuff you have or how lazy you happen to be. And to Walmart's credit (a phrase you will not here again from me), they have recognized that some people only buy one or two items and have put in 6 -8 new quick cash registers for those people. Anyways, back to my story...

So I am in line with a cart full of stuff. I go there once a month and buy a lot of stuff so I don't have to go back. There were 4 other people behind me who also had full carts. I had finished loading my stuff onto the conveyor and put the divider up for the next lady. She started to unload her million items when the JA approached. He had 1 large bottle of pop and 1 bag of chips. He stood between us without saying anything. The lady and I exchanged glances. She spoke up and mentioned that she was next in line. He stared at her and then said "but I only have a few things, and I don't want to stand in line". She pointed out the lines at the front of the store for the people like him with only a few items. He did not say anything and continued to stand there, finally saying "look I am not waiting in line." Seriously, this is class A super triple star Jack Ass. If it was an old lady, a disabled person or someone who clearly had reduced capacity it would have been a different situation. No this guy was just a fat lazy ass who clearly needed his pop and chips and refused to accept any form of the social custom of lines. It got a little ugly as all the people behind me started yelling. It did not deter this guy and finally the cashier just put him through to avoid a total all out brawl. The worst part is that he got his way so now he thinks that his behavior is okay. Like I said Jack Ass!

Is it hot in here?

2010-07-07T09:43:00.003-04:00

Yes it is freaking hot in here! It is freaking hot everywhere. Right now it is something ridiculous like 36 degrees with humidity and it is only 9am, today it is supposed to get up to the low 40's. Seriously what kind of place is this, in the winter it is -40 and in the summer it is +40, what the hell? My face, my sanity and my mind are all melting. Everything except the fat is melting, why is that always the way. Nothing works in this heat least of all my brain. It could have something to do with the lack of sleep, but that is also a result of the heat so basically I am a big whinny puddle today. I have a lot of stuff to get done but all I want to do is curl up under the A/C vent, crack open a beer and hibernate until it cools off again.

Baby A has an A/C in her room, we put it there when we learned that if she is hot she does not sleep, and if she does not sleep we do not sleep. Funny how strong that correlation is. For the last few nights it was working great. She had a nice comfortable sleep while we tossed and turned in the heat. However, my poor little monkey has got another cold and spent most of last night awake, and hence my lack of sleep and complete disorganized thought process. I just keep saying, "wow it's freaking hot", that is all I seem to have today.

My office is partially air conditioned. There is A/C in the building and it works sporadically in varying locations. Inconsistency is just one of the many services that McGill provides. However, once you turn on a few lasers, a few cooling systems, the mercury lamp and a few computers the room heats up pretty fast. The one upside to this is that cells and other living biological material are happiest at 37 degrees, and if you can manage to suffer through an experiment they tend to work out pretty nicely. Essentially our lab is a really big incubator, yup it is pretty gross in here.

I feel this is punishment for all the times we complain in the winter that it is too cold. Right now I am trying to channel those cold January days, its not working. My happy place has A/C but apparently it isn't working there either. Well enough whining about the heat. I am going to get something done so I can go home and take another cold shower. Stay cool my friends.

Positate the negative

2010-07-05T09:32:00.004-04:00

Do you feel like your family shapes your attitudes and behavior? Of course they do. We are a sum of our experiences, good and bad, happy and sad, all of them contribute to who we are. Sadly we can't always make sure those experiences are positive. Growing up I think I experienced a lot of "stuff" that forced me to grow up too fast, I saw the ugly side of the people sometimes way to early. I don't want to start talking about these experiences now, that could take days. But I know that I could not have gotten through a lot of them if I did not have my family. They are wonderful and supportive, and it proves that not all negative experiences have to leave a lasting bitterness.

I think that by and large I am a positive person. Some people are reading this and saying Ha! How can you be positive when you are always making sarcastic comments? Well that is just is, there is a difference between being unhappy/bitter and being sarcastic. Sarcasm is a form of humor, bitterness is a lifestyle. Recently someone had made the comment to me that I am too negative. I took that to heart because I actively try to be positive. I really do try and see the positive side, if not at first at least after a few minutes of pouting. I am not claiming to be sunshine bear, but I am also not a giant rain cloud. Why did it bother me so much when someone called me negative? Well it goes back to my earlier question. How much of your current behavior and life is a result of your family?

My grandmother is 91. She has lived a long time. She has survived her husband, her boyfriend, and her sister. When I was little she looked after me everyday from the time I was 1 until I started school. She was the ideal grandma in that she let me eat what ever I wanted (candy, McDonald's she did not care), she let me watch what I wanted, and pretty much do what ever I wanted. One of my favorite memories of her is when I was about 4 and I found the top of a christmas tree in the park. I asked if we could bring it back to her house and decorate it. She said sure. We did not have another tree stand and it was a pretty sad tree (think Charlie Brown's Christmas). So her solution was to saw the back off of the tree and use the nail gun to nail it to the wall. We then used the stapler to staple ornaments to the tree/wall. Not to many grandma's would let you do that. I thought she was great.

She took amazing care of me and I had a happy childhood thanks largely to her. What is interesting is that she is the most negative unhappy person you will ever meet. I did not realize this until I was closer to my teenage years. She has been claiming she is dying for 29 plus years now. Every Christmas is her last, every weekend she was sure she was going to die and every time to talk to her she only complains about how horrible her life is. She complains non stop, she has no friends, she has nothing to do, nobody comes to visit her and nobody cares about her, this is all she will say to you when ever you see her. You can't talk about anything else because she just shuts down and pouts if she thinks you are not taking her seriously. It makes it very hard to be around her. This makes me incredibly sad. During the last 20 years it has pushed me away from her. It has pushed almost all of her family away from her. I still send her cards, letters, and photos, I still see her when ever I am back home but I don't go out of my way to go and see her. I hate to admit that but it is true. She has done so much for me and I remind myself of that every time I start to have negative thoughts about her, but her negatively makes it hard to want to spend time with her. My mom's two brothers and their kids, and kids kids do not even talk to her. Like I said it is very sad. She is their mother, our grandmother and nobody can deal with the bitterness. Now she really is getting old and will die and I feel like her attitude has prevented her from enjoying her golden years.

So when I say that I actively try to be positive that is why. When I was younger I resolved to not to end up like that. She has lots of other wonderful qualities, generosity, patience, and loyalty that I can take away, but her outlook on life is not to be emulated. I can't control her attitude, but I can control mine.

Smart Shopping Indeed

2010-07-04T09:48:00.001-04:00

I love a good bargain. Who doesn't? Bargains have been my business for a long time now. Living on a student income for the last 13 years has forced me to be frugal and sometimes creative. When I lived in Calgary I knew exactly where to go to find a good deal on almost anything. I pride myself on the fact that I never pay full price for anything and my incredible finds are my treasures. When we moved here to Montreal I had to start the hunt all over again. Luckily one of my co-workers told me about Sandra's Smart Shopping Slog. For those of you who live in Montreal, or plan on visiting this is a great website to help you find the best deals! It is so good I just had to share it.

Type A

2010-07-02T13:03:00.002-04:00

Well the end has come to another busy week. Dylan got home safe and sound, baby A was happy to see her daddy. I managed to get through another week of work without causing extreme bodily harm to any of my co-workers, so that is good. Who says I lack self control? The house is clean, the freezer is full of baby food, the laundry is done, and the fridge is full. I think we will all be sad to see my mom go home on Sunday. It was a nice vacation from daily drudgery having her around. It has been a great visit but I guess she has to go home sometime.

It is actually strange having my mom around so much. I say strange because before baby A came along there is no way my mom and I could have lived together like this for 1 month. I love my mom, she is a great lady, a great role model and a great mom. However, we are both type A personalities and normally that does not make it easy for us to be in the same small space for any length of time. I was very eager to move out and have my own space, my own way of doing things and my own routine. I did not mind people visiting my space as long as they left it the way it was. When I was younger, I would clean the house top to bottom before my parents came to visit, then my mom would arrive and when I was not looking start secret cleaning something. It used to piss me off, now she can openly clean and I don't mind at all. There are countless stupid examples like that where I tried to exert/show my independence and she tried to be my mom, and then I would get aggravated and frustrated. Now I get it, or at least I am grateful for her wanting to come over and wash and iron my drapes. I think I am still a very independent person, still type A, but now I am a little more comfortable asking for help, and letting people help me. So now that my mom is gone I have a long list of chores that need to be done in addition to working full time and playing with my little monkey. I think that we need to either invent another week day or some how get a wife. I would say a maid but we can't afford to pay anyone so I guess a stay at home wife is the only option. Either that or my mom has to win the lottery so she can move to Montreal, I am flexible.

Speaking of being flexible, I am not as flexible as I remembered being. I played baseball last week and I think I may have pulled something. If I sit in one place too long I try to stand up and there is a shooting pain that radiates down my hip. I guess that means I should get off my butt and do more exercise. I get it, but that does not mean I have to like it.

The second injury I have sustained this week was when I sewed over my right finger with my sewing machine. Don't ask me how I accomplished this, but somehow I got my finger under the presser foot and tried to stitch my nail to my finger permanently. I bent the needle in half and made a heck of a mess with the blood but luckily I did not need stitches. How ironic that would have been. I sewed over my finger so I am here to get it stitched up....ha ha, I think its pretty funny.

Anyways, its Friday and I am off to group therapy (meeting) and then heading out for a date tonight with Dylan. I love date night, and I love it even more when we get to leave the house.

JAW Award

2010-07-01T09:54:00.003-04:00

I have decided to have a new feature on my blog, the Jack Ass of the Week Award. Considering how many times a day I shake my head in utter disbelief I think the problem will be limiting this award to one person per week. Case in point I have two people this week who are tied for the very first JAW Award.

Nominee #1 - One of my collaborators. We are working on the manuscript for our latest paper, that is nothing new. I had sent him my draft and for weeks I was awaiting his constructive, enlightened comments. Don't worry I found some things to occupy my time (note all the new blog posts). Okay back the reason he is a jackass. After two weeks I get back some helpful comments, but in one section of the paper he crossed out everything I had written, 2 paragraphs specifically describing the results of a particular graph. Underneath what he crossed off he wrote. "Using words describe the graph here". Thanks butthole I actually considered using a series of clicks and bangs but figured that would be hard to translate onto paper. I had also considered webdings but if you think words are the way to go, then maybe I will give that a whirl. Like I said Jack Ass!

Nominee #2 - Currently I am squatting in the corner of an abandoned lab. I am not the only squatter here trying to stake my claim to the ever valuable, ever shrinking available space. Anyways, two of us from my lab are in 1 corner, a really old dinosaur sometimes emerges from his cave and occupies the desk behind my makeshift wall and then a fourth guy hangs out in the opposite corner sometimes looking busy but mostly looking sketchy. There are two doors to this hovel, one on our side and one on the other. There is no key for the door by my desk. So that door is always locked. The other door is also always locked and you need a key to even enter this room. We are considering adopting a secret handshake. Anyways, back to this nominee. So squatter #4 comes up to us yesterday and says "when you leave the room can you check that the door is locked, I am working on some very important research and I don't want anyone to steal anything."
First of all, isn't all our work "very important", or do you think I sit over here in my little corner licking snozzberries and doing paint by number.
Second of all, I lock the door so people don't steal my computer, lap top, wallet and other valuables, because that is what people steal. Nobody wants your freaking experiment.
Lastly, stop being a pretentious assbag and go back to your "very important research" and leave me alone so I can check my facebook.

Like I said it is a pretty tough competition this week. I think for the inaugural award we can afford to give out two. Although I still have not decided what the prize should be, right now it is a toss up between a kick in the ass and a punch in the face.

Balance

2010-06-30T07:41:00.001-04:00

I was having an interesting discussion with one of my co-workers about being a parent. His gf's little brother is visiting from another country and staying at their house for most of the summer. He was complaining about his lack of privacy, lack of free time and increased level of responsibility. After which point he basically came to the conclusion he was not ready to have kids, at least not any time soon. Fair enough. It is not an easy job but and it is not easy when you get a kid out of no where. It is much easier to start with a baby and go from there. Of course I offered the standard phrase "its different when its your own kid". Then I though about what I said, and I though about a time last week when another colleague asked me if I enjoyed being a parent. When they first asked me this I was mildly offended, "of course I love my baby was my first response". Then the more rational side of me realized that was not the question that was asked. So after all this I sat down and thought about being a parent, what does it mean and how do I feel about being a parent. I know dangerous territory, people take the job of parenting very seriously and can become quite heated when discussing the whole thing. Feel free to stop reading at any point if you find your feathers getting all fluffy, but this is my blog and I am going to explore my feelings on this topic openly and honestly.

I feel there is a big difference between being a mom and being a parent, at least to me. I think that being a mother (not excluding fathers, but we are talking about me here) is fairly natural thing for most people, but of course there are always exceptions. For me the that super protective feeling started even before the baby arrived. The motherly love was pretty instantaneous, without much help I could figure out how to hold, calm and sooth my baby. There are a lot of natural instincts which kick in that help you make it through those first few months, then all of a sudden one day you realize you have to be a parent and that is not so innate. Its the mommy in me who sings "Old McDonald had a farm" just so Baby A will eat her broccoli, blows bubbles for her while she is in her bath because its her favorite thing, stays up all night holding her when she is sick and can not sleep, and feels every bump and bruise she gets. Its the mommy in me who loves to cuddle, kiss and tickle her, make her giggle and comfort her when she cries. The mommy part is pretty great, you get lots of love in return for being a mommy. However, being a parent is not so fun; setting bedtimes, discipline, washing, cleaning, being 100% responsible for everything (health, welfare, etc), and knowing what to do in every situation. These are less glamourous, less rewarding parts, these are the parent parts. Its the parent in me who is still a little unsure of this whole thing and sometimes has a pretty hard time coming to terms with all of the changes in our life.

When we became parents 10.5 months ago some things had to change, obviously. We no longer had total control over our lives, the teeny tiny empress was in charge. Did we begrudge this change, no of course not, but it does not mean it was always an easy transition, and it certainly does not mean you can't miss some aspects of your old life. However, I found that if you vocalize this around any other parents you get the "look" and the immediate judgmental response "it is what being a parent is all about". I know those people hate getting up at 3am just like I do, I know that they hate cleaning up vomit and diarrhea, I know they hate temper tantrums, so why can't we admit that? Why is it so unacceptable to say "being a parent is hard and not always great"? Why can't we say openly "being a mom, love that, love the kids, but this parent stuff, well that kinda sucks sometimes".

I find similar issues when discussing work with some other parents. I want to make clear that I 100% respect moms who stay home and raise their children. I think that is the very best thing for kids, to have a mom at home. I see it in baby A. I wish I could stay home. But the reality is, we need both incomes right now, and as an added bonus I enjoy having something going on that is just for me. That is not to say that parents who chose to work outside the home and have to put their kids in daycare are doing anything wrong either. Some parents feel guilty for wanting to work, and they shouldn't. You should not feel guilty for either choice, isn't there enough stress with this job without piling on all the guilt?

And why is so unacceptable to continue to be yourself? Just because you give birth it does not mean that suddenly you undergo a lobotomy and completely change your personality. Having children does not change your dreams, your sense of humor or who you are as a person. It does change your priorities, your focus and your immediate lifestyle but those things are also temporary (if you call 18 years temporary). After your kids grow up and leave your house you still have to live your life. Yes you will always be their mother but at some point you stop being a parent and then what? If you believe all the propaganda about how to be the ideal parent you will have given up everything, dedicated all your time and energy to your children, given up friends, and hobbies, and in some cases the relationship with your spouse. It is not fun to admit but it happens. Make no mistake, I am not saying that you should not give your children love and affection, or spend time with them, what I am saying is there should be a balance. You should be able to balance the mommy, parent and person parts without fear of being criticized or judged. I am a firm believer that if you are not happy it is impossible to make others happy, and happy mommy's have happy kidos.

So yes, part of me does not love the parent stuff. I am so happy and grateful that we have baby A in our lives, but that does not mean I am going to go all Care Bear sweaters and mom jeans. I do miss playing soft ball and going for a beer at the pub after, but that does not mean I don't love reading my baby a bedtime story and kissing her goodnight. I love playing pat-a-cake and peek-a-boo, but that does not mean that I don't want to go out with my husband to a movie alone. Some days I wish I could just bugger off for a few hours without having to do an errand, but that does not mean I don't enjoy taking my little one to new places and watching her discover the world. I am sad thinking about all the little things I may miss when she is at daycare, but that does not mean I want to give up all I have worked so hard to achieve. It is all about balance and right now that is what I am working to find, a balance.

So I guess the answer to the question is that I am happy that I am a parent, but there are days when I enjoy it a little less. However, I love being a mommy and that is always constant.

Excited

2010-06-29T10:18:00.001-04:00

I am pretty excited, why you ask? Well tomorrow I get my husband back. It has been a long busy month and I miss him like crazy. I know to some people one month is not very long, but since we moved to Montreal in December 2006 it is longest we have been apart. When we met Dylan was doing is Masters at UBC and I was doing my PhD at UofC. We did the long distance thing for 1 year before he moved to Calgary (temporarily), and then we moved here. I hate long distance relationships, it is just frustrating. However, this month has reminded me of the things I have been taking for granted. I missed having dinners together, talking about our days, sitting on our back deck at night sharing a beer or glass of wine, Dylan reading the interesting stories to me from the Globe & Mail, and rolling over and seeing him there. Our life is not glamorous or exciting (most days), but it is our life and I miss it.

Family Adventure

2010-06-28T11:38:00.023-04:00

So last week I mentioned we were off to Quebec City for a fun family adventure. It was pretty fun, to be honest I did not expect it to turn out nearly as well. Not sure what I expected, but I thought there would be more tears and less sleep. Luckily I was wrong.

Since Hubby is working in Vancouver for the month my mamma flew out to help out with the baby. I can handle a few days but 30 would have probably killed me, once again single moms you are my new heros. My dad was also able to fly out for one week, and we decided to work in a trip to Quebec City. When I came up with this idea a month ago there were a few details I did not really think through. For example, since I wanted to stay right downtown I decided we could all share one room to save cost and get us a better location. What slipped my mind is that baby A gets up at 5am everyday and goes to bed at 7:30pm. Second detail I did not consider is that baby A may not want to drive for 3 hours in the Quebec countryside seeing the beautiful trees and picturesque farms. Third detail I forgot to consider is that it may rain and the 4 of us would be trapped in a fancy hotel room for 2 days. And finally the last detail I forgot to consider is that I have not traveled with my parents for 10 years. I have traveled to visit them at their house, they have come to my house but we have not traveled together and shared a hotel room for 10 years. I love my parents but would I love them after 48 hours of super close contact.

Despite my poor foresight everything worked out okay, well mostly. By timing the driving around the nap schedule we managed to only have about 45 minutes of screaming in total so that was pretty good. Lucky for us the rain was only really an issue on the drive there and back. When it rained at night I did not feel so bad that we were back in the hotel room so early. And much to my shock and amazement we managed to tinker with the sleep shedule a little (bed at 10 up at 8am), there was one hour of fun between 3-4 am which made me seriously doubt my sanity but we got through it. We did manage to spend the whole 48 hours without any fighting or bickering, I think baby A kept us all to busy.

That is not say the whole adventure was without stress and stupidity. At 9:30 pm the first night we had to play a rousing game of musical hotel rooms once we discovered that we had absolutely NO hot water and the phones in our room did not work. We packed up in a record 10 minutes and managed to get the crib set up again 10 minutes later, and one tried cranky baby bathed and in bed. I also managed to forget the electric bottle warmer and we had to track down a kettle and improvise some system for heating up the bottles and food. I also came to the distinct conclusion that when they built Quebec City back in the 1600's strollers must not have been very popular. Pushing a stroller over cobblestone is not fun, and pushing it straight up a grassy hill is not recommended either. Even my fancy new compact model was too big to fit in most places. There are a lot of stairs in Quebec City which are not usually a problem for people who are not packing a baby, a stroller, and 100lbs of baby gear, cameras and food. Even in the hotel there was a ridiculous maze of stairs and elevators to get to our room. "Just go down the main hallway, turn right and take that elevator up 1 floor, following it along to the right and then take the next elevator up another floor, then go left and find the elevator up to the 5th floor." I wish I was kidding. I got lost a few times, who freaking designed this place?

Here is a quick summary of our stay in Quebec:

Hotel: Chateau Laurier, a great hotel for the location plus you get the added bonus of exercise and brushing up on your orientation skills. It was actually a fantastic location, about 5 minutes walk into the walls of the old city. Near tons of restaurants and pubs.

Plains of Abraham: Its a big huge park, you may remember hearing about it in social studies. We were there the morning after the big St Jean Baptiste concert. It looked like a battle had just taken place, and I am sure if were there a few hours earlier we may have seen some causualties. Its big, its got a fantastic view, but that is about it. Reading about it is more exciting. There are also cannons everywhere all over the city. At first you take pictures of them, then you realized they are like park benches here.

Citadelle: An active military base which also happens to be the Governor General's official residence in Canada. It is impressive. You have to take a guided tour, it did not coincide with baby A's nap time so we only got to see a small part of it. If you like military history this is a good place to visit. You also get to see guards dressed up in funny costumes, always entertaining.

Chateau Frontinac: A big CP Rail hotel. It looks like the Banff Springs, The Chateau Lake Louis and the Empress. It is impressive the first time if you have not seen any of these other hotels. Otherwise it is just a very expensive hotel. Last time Dylan and I were in Quebec City we went up to the St Laurent Bar and enjoyed the most expensive Campari and soda ever. The view was worth it. The bathrooms are nice. In front of the Chateau there is a great promenade overlooking the St Lawrence, a great place for an ice cream break. There is also a live archeological dig going on to uncover the original walls of Champlain's second fort, Fort Saint Louis. That was pretty neat.

Petit Champlain: A very quaint little shopping and eating area below the Chateau. It is supposedly the oldest commercial district in North America. There are tons of little hidden gems (murals, statues, cannons, etc) to discover as you wander around. They also have very nice very clean public bathrooms. This area is much easier to navigate without a stroller, wheel chair or walker.

Place D'Armes: Big statue with some nice little shops and restaurants.

Grand Allee: Big long street with the Parliament building on one end and lots of resturants on the other.

City walls: Big walls with nice entrances to walk through into the old city. Unsurprisingly they are made of stone, also unsurprisingly they smell like urine.

Joan of Arc Garden: Super beautiful flowers, all different colors and smells. Lots of bees.

Martello Towers: Big towers which were used to defend the city on the one side (don't ask me which direction). They looked cool from the outside but we did not investigate the inside because it was not stroller friendly and we were to tired to shlep everything up and down the stairs once again.

Montmorency Falls: About 20 minutes outside of Quebec City, beautiful and worth the trip. We walked over the falls on the suspension bridge, despite my fear of heights and vertigo, yah me. We did not do the 1000 stairs, once again due to the stroller issue. We still did a lot of walking and exploring. This also happens to be another site for one of the many battles between the French and English, no surprise you can't swing a dead cat without hitting a battle site in Quebec.

Horse drawn carriage tour: it was pretty and after walking for 8 hours I was pretty happy to sit down. Baby A loved the horsey ride. It is not cheap and if it wasn't for the baby I don't think I would have done it. Our driver did not seem to interested in telling us about the history of the area which is pretty much the sole reason we did the tour. If wanted to read the guide book I wouldn't be paying you money. Oh well, like I said baby A loved it!

All in all it was a pretty good trip. Since I work in Quebec all the time I was not sure how much I would enjoy being there as a tourist, but I did really enjoy seeing all the things I normally ignore. I was also surprized to find that the people there were much more friendly and willing to speak English than people in Montreal (in the tourist areas anyways). The Quebec people are much more polite and much more considerate than those who live in Montreal, so don't let the language prevent you from coming for a visit!

And don't let the jackass attitudes of some of the Quebecois scare you off, 90% of the people are not idiots.

On the fence

2010-06-26T13:59:00.000-04:00

Lately I have been on the fence about my future career path. I am fairly certain I am ready to leave the world of academia and enter the "real world", but part of me is still hanging back reluctant to hang up the lab coat. I guess that is the part of me who hates pantyhose.

When I was a younger more foolish version of myself, I had planned on getting a BSc and getting a job. I planned on working 9 -5, buying a house, getting married, having some kids, and job satisfaction did not really seem very important to me. Work was not meant to be fun, it was a means to pay for the fun I would have on weekends. That was the plan 19 year old me had formulated. I worked hard, I got good grades, I liked chemistry but when I looked at the grad students toiling away for hours in the labs I did not see myself in their sensible shoes and dirty clothes. In fact, a past TA of mine recalls me saying specifically "I hate phys chem, who would ever do this for a living". He likes to remind me of this. I worked my summers doing crappy jobs like landscaping. Then in my second last year of school there was a chance to apply for a special program which would allow me to spend the summer doing research in a lab at a different University. The research topic (reactive intermediates and photochemistry) seemed interesting, but what really intrigued me was the idea of spending a summer in another place. Saskatoon is not the most exciting place to hang out. One student from each University is chosen, I applied on a whim, and I got selected.

I spent the summer working in Victoria, and to my surprise I actually loved it, not just the place, but the work. I enjoyed the puzzle like nature of doing research. It is not fun to reproduce the same experiment 1000 other students have done hundreds of times, it was fun to invent and design my own experiments. I had a great group of lab mates, we laughed and joked. They did not wear ugly shoes and dirty clothes. They showered, and had a sense of humor. My preconceived notions of grad students was shattered. We played baseball, went for coffee and spent many nights at the pub doing music trivia. Grad school looked awesome! After that summer I decided I wanted to get a PhD and then later become a prof. I wanted my own group. After all my long term relationship totally crashed and burned, marriage and kids were no longer a part of the picture, so I decided to take a few years to explore the world on my own. I got the PhD. That was a great adventure, I did a lot, had a ton of new experiences and saw a lot of new places. I got an NSERC PDF and now 10 years after my fabulous summer in Victoria, I have decided I do not want to be a professor. So where does that leave me?

I know that there are definite benefits to being a professor, I am not blind to those. I like having flexibility in my day, coming and going when I dictate, I like having the freedom to choose what I work on, and I do still get a little jolt when I figure something out, or one of experiments works. The high is still there for me. But is it worth it? Is it worth slogging through all the grant writing, all the interviews, all the department meetings, all the political landmines, all the hours? In the hallway is a poster advertising a talk this week. I read the title and immediately I decided that without question I would rather have a colonoscopy with flaming endoscope than sit through this talk. I think that is a pretty clear sign.

Once again in my more naive days I though going into industry meant selling out. I used to believe that people who worked in academia were there for the love of science. I felt like people in industry were "working for the man", and the man was evil. What did I know, I had pink and yellow hair in those days. Now I know that not all people in academia are here for the love of science, some have to stay here because they can't function in the real world. Is fear and social dysfunction a good reason to stay?

I guess what I am worried about is that if I leave will I look back one day and feel like I walked away too soon. Despite my current issues it is pretty comfortable here in this life, and change is scary. After all, I have not had a "real job" in 12 years, I don't even know what I want to do. I just know I need to make a move because while this fence is pretty comfortable I can't hang out here forever.

In any case I have a little time to figure this out, but I am open for suggestions for new career paths.

The itch

2010-06-25T10:53:00.000-04:00

Do you ever feel compelled to drive the train off the rails? Sometimes life seems so calm and serene that I feel the need to spice it up a little. Some (like my neurobiologist collaborator) might say that defines mania, but it is just my personality. Let me be clear, I won't actually drive my car off the road, I don't feel compelled to hurt myself or others, and I am not really into self destructive behavior. It is more like having an itch that you want to scratch but you can't quite reach it. Does this make sense to anyone else? Or are you sitting there thinking "wow this chick is totally loco, I would trade anything for a little calmness and serenity right now". Yah, I hear you, I get it, but that doesn't stop the itch.

When I was younger I would satisfy these moments with things like tattoos (I have 3), piercings (had a couple that have since grown over), putting on crazy costumes, haircuts, and other random adventures (ie. fetish shows (to be honest I did not know what I agreed to go to), drag queen shows, Gwar concerts, hey I will try anything once). See I am not that weird, just bored I guess. I blame the fact that for a very long time I had about 5 things going at once. I don't know how to sit still, I can't really relax the way other people can. I can sit for about 1 hour and then I start getting stir crazy. I actually feel more normal when I am juggling 3 or 4 things at once. That is not to say I am not "busy", or that I don't have enough work. Oh I have plenty of work, but that doesn't give me the little adrenaline rush, or joie de vie that I need, that I crave.

Since baby A came along I have not had much time to feel this way. However, with my mom here helping out I have found myself with a lot of free time (comparatively). Those old feelings of stir crazy are creeping up and I am trying to figure out what I want to do about it. If Dylan were here we would probably bugger off for a few days to go explore some new place, go camping or take a mini trip. Those things are less thrilling alone. Some people get their fix by jumping out of planes, off high buildings, or bridges (attached to a bungee of course). I am too afraid of heights and dying to use those old standard adrenaline fixes. So now I have to come up with something. Here is a short list of ideas I have so far.

1. Dress up in my psycho nurses costume from a few Halloweens back and wander around Walmart offering free checkups.
2. Get a trench coat, walkie talkie and sunglasses, and follow strangers around pretending to be a spy.
3. Get myself some peeps, a few cans of ginger ale and hang out in random locations eating them and looking sketchy. If that doesn't make any sense to you, consider yourself lucky.
4. Put on a bathing suit and rubber boots (sorry for the mental picture) and go puddle jumping.
5. Drive to the airport with a toothbrush, deodorant, and 1 change of clothes. Get on the first flight you can.

I wish I could say I would do one of these, but I will probably just go get a new haircut, paint my nails a sassy color, blast some music and drive fast with the windows down. How did I get so boring?

In loving memory of a ridiculous day.

Fete Nationale

2010-06-24T10:01:00.002-04:00

Bonne Fete Nationale mes amis. Today is Quebec's national holiday. Its like our version of Canada day (which is moving day here in Quebec). Quebec is not the only place that celebrates St John Baptiste Day, France, Denmark, Sweden, Finland, Latvia and Estonia all celebrate some version of this holiday, typically in the form of a religious feast. While I am not religious I can certainly get behind the idea of a feast!

Anyways, St Jean Baptiste Day (spelling differs if you are reading a French or English text and we don't want to discriminate here) is a big deal here in Quebec. There is a ton of religious and political history surrounding this celebration but we are not going to get into that. Mostly because I lost interest half way through reading about it. Blah blah, something about the Pope designating St John Baptiste as the patron Saint of French Canadians. Blah blah blah, celebrations organized by the church later rejected during the quiet revolution. Blah blah, first time the lyrics of O'Canada were heard publicly. Blah blah blah, now everybody in Quebec gets the day off regardless of religion or language. Who says this blog is not both fun and educational. Suffice it to say that overtime this has caused some real points of contention between the Anglo's and Francophone's. Today it is just a great chance to celebrate Quebec culture. There are huge celebrations in both Montreal and Quebec City, parades, flags, face painting and all sorts of food, and fun festivities. It is a great time to visit Quebec.

Since this is baby A's first (and possibly only St Jean Baptiste day), we will be celebrating this year in Quebec City. After all, she was born here and this is part of her culture. Sadly she does not speak enough French to translate for us so I will have to do my worst. In any case I love to visit Quebec City (especially when I do not have to work at the mental hospital) so it should be a great time. Here are a few shots from when Dylan and I were there 2 years ago.

Petite Champlain

The famed Chateau Frontenac

I am very excited because this time I will be taking my good camera and I can't wait to get some beautiful shots of the city.